The Assignment
by aushapasha
Summary: Loner Dr. Paige Smith is a psychologist hired by SHIELD before the battle of New York. She is assigned to keep track of the mental well being of The Avengers after the battle and Agent Coulson's death. After she receives a new assignment, we find out the magnitude of the devastation left behind after the attack on The Avengers and New York. OC/Cap Non-slash FULL SUMMARY INSIDE
1. Chapter 1

_**Loner Dr. Paige Smith is a psychologist hired by SHIELD before the battle of New York. She is assigned to keep track of the mental well-being of The Avengers after the battle and Agent Coulson's death. After she receives a new assignment, we find out the magnitude of the devastation left after the attack by Loki and the Chitauri. As new alliances are made, can old ones be forgotten? What happens when an experiment goes too far? Can Paige survive her new assignment even when it tilts her world on end and could cause complete devastation to life as she knows it.**_

**A/N: Those of you that are familiar with my other stories may be surprised that this isn't a Twilight story. Some may be disappointed that I haven't finished my other stories, but I am working on them! Many thanks to yagalinus0420 for being a super awesome beta and my own personal internet shrink! Go to her page and check out her stories...share the love people! Reviews are always appreciated! No planned update schedule, but I'm shooting for at least once a week. If you don't like the idea of an OC...give it shot. if you still don't like it, I understand and you can walk away with no hard feelings at all. And just so everyone knows, almost every main character from The Avengers will make an appearance. **

**As always...I own nothing in the Marvel Universe. Joss Whedon is a genius and I'm not. I just had a dream that wouldn't go away.**

Maria Hill.

She was really starting to get on my last nerve. Never opening up about her and trying to maintain this hard ass persona she had created. It was exhausting trying to work with her.

"Doctor, I understand that I was ordered by Director Fury to come and see you, but I don't see how these sessions are supposed to _help _me." She stated calmly.

I took a deep breath before responding. It had been this way for the last two years.

"Maria, if you don't feel like you are making any progress, why do you keep coming for our weekly appointment?" I asked, for the 105th time. I waited patiently for her answer, knowing that it would be the same as it was the other 104 times; but I secretly hoped it would be different.

She narrowed her eyes slightly at me and squared her shoulders. I braced myself for her outburst.

"I have come ever week for the last two years because I was ordered to do so." She stated; surprisingly calm. I saw her eyes dart over to my bookshelf. Along with the occasional knick knacks and pictures of places I had visited, there was also a picture of the Avengers team. Included in the picture was the ever cool Agent Coulson.

I glanced over to where the picture stood in a simple wooden frame. I felt a rush of remorse; something I felt often when I saw Phil. Or thought about him or he was mentioned.

He was an excellent agent. He had truly believed in the Avengers initiative and what each member could bring, even when others doubted the idea.

"Maria-"I started before I was cut off by an overhead page.

"Doctor Smith. Paging Doctor Smith. Please report immediately to the director's office." A disembodied voice rang out over the paging system.

"Same time next week, Doctor?" Maria smirked at me. I shook my head slowly.

"No. I'll send you an appointment time Maria." I stood and began collecting my file on Agent Hill.

"I may even cancel. Please wait for notice from me." I said as professionally as I could muster.

Before I had even finished my sentence, I heard the door open and shut.

Maria Hill. She was exhausting. I was tired of trying to get her to open up about Coulson and any lingering feelings of survivor's guilt she may be harboring. I took another look at the picture on the shelf and wondered what Phil would have said about this.

I collected my things and made my way out of my office. I looked to my secretary and was instantly happy, yet again, that Stark had created a version of JARVIS for my needs. It was a simpler program than what I understood he had, but it served my needs. I named her Stacey.

"Stacey; I'll be in the Director's office. Reschedule anything for the next three hours. I have a feeling I'll need some time to unwind after this meeting." I said flippantly. Stacey's voice came out through the speaker system.

"Yes Doctor. You have no appointments remaining this afternoon. I will forward any messages to your phone." She said as pleasantly as a computer could.

I turned to roughly where I thought I would have had a secretary sit.

"Stacey, do you know why the Director wants to see me?" I asked knowing full well, that she could easily hack into his office and see if I should be prepared for anything.

"No ma'am." Was her short answer.

I rolled my head on my shoulders and cracked my neck. I grabbed my key card and walked out into the long corridor.

Working for S.H.I.E.L.D should have been a dream come true. And for many reasons it was.

Being recruited at age 29 to work as a psychologist for the single most influential and secretive government organization was quite the boost to my ego. But, I always reminded myself that I had worked hard for my degree and I earned my job with every single session I held.

S.H.I.E.L.D employed two psychologists in its Helicarrier; one for the general population of agents and employees and one for a smaller and more elite group of individuals. I was assigned to the latter.

Maybe it was because I could easily detach myself from given situations, I mused as I continued down the corridor. I noticed agents either averting my gaze or outright staring at me. It was something I was used to.

SHIELD encouraged alliances amongst agents and employees; but friendships were frowned upon. It was one thing to be colleagues and work together; it was another to go out and get shitfaced on a Saturday night and sing karaoke with your coworkers.

I occasionally broke that rule, especially with Phil. I remembered how he would sometimes come by my office at the end of the day and convince me to have a drink with him. Then there were a few times I went out with Barton and Natasha, but I wouldn't consider those friendships per se.

I turned the corner on my right and smiled a little to myself. I didn't need friendships or alliances. I had been on my own long enough and that suited me just fine.

As I approached Fury's office I was reminded of my first visit to this office. That was after he'd showed up at my private practice in Kansas City, Mo and offered me a job.

Fury didn't have a secretary…or a version of JARVIS. He had cameras in his office. He knew who was outside his office door and when they arrived. He was a master at reading body language and could decipher a person's mood before he even spoke to them.

I learned to wait outside the door until you were permitted inside the Director's office.

I bounced lightly on the balls of my feet, waiting somewhat impatiently for him to open the door. He had paged me 6 minutes ago. I was probably considered late by his standards. Finally behind the door, I heard his gruff voice.

"Doctor Smith! Come!" he barked. I rolled my eyes again in an over exaggerated was to let him know I thought his command was unnecessary.

I opened the door and like always, was shocked at how dark it was inside his office. Huge monitors lined the back wall. If rumors were true those were how he held teleconferences with the President, NSA, FBI, CIA and Department of Homeland Security. I also knew for a fact that he could access any part of the Helicarrier through those monitors; save for private quarters. He had his eye and ears on every single square inch of this base.

Fury was currently standing at his windows to my left. His hands were clasped behind his back and staring out into the sky. We were currently were gliding over the Atlantic Ocean, but I knew we would soon be docking in New York, where hundreds of agents would take shore leave.

I took a seat in one the hard plastic chairs he had and waited for him to speak.

I respected Fury; and I believed he respected me. If I ever decided to claim any alliance to anyone, it would be him. He seemed to understand what my issues were and I felt gave me a little more slack than other member in his elite team.

"How is Agent Hill progressing?" he asked as he turned and strode to his desk chair and sat opposite me.

I took a deep breath. This was going to go one of two ways: Fury's way or the right way.

"Agent Hill is unresponsive to our sessions. She refuses to acknowledge Agent Coulson's presumed death and is unwilling to communicate her feelings." I stated stoically.

Fury gave me what can only be described as a death stare. His eye narrowed directly on me.

"Doctor, Agent Coulson died at the hands of Loki two years ago. He was interred in his hometown in Montana." Fury stated evenly; just as he had after the battle when the Avengers first fought together.

I looked pointedly at the Director. I had a feeling that apart from Stark, I may have been the only person to openly challenge him, even if it was in the confines of his private office.

He reached under his desk and immediately the lights came on. All the monitors on the back wall went blank. I blinked rapidly to adjust to the light, where it had been so dark.

"Paige, we've been over this. The general consensus is that Phil Coulson died in the battle of New York. We need to maintain that line of thinking." Fury explained to me like I was a juvenile. Not for the first time I might add.

"Nick," I started and he nodded to allow me to continue. "Phil was a friend. He was the first to approach me for recruitment and I trusted him. I know that friendships are frowned upon, because in the event that we lose someone, we have to be able to move on." I stopped to run a hand over my face and stand up. I started pacing.

"How can I effectively do my job when the truth about Coulson and how he "died" is still up for debate?" I used air quotes; Fury hated air quotes. Stark used them all the time.

"Paige; I understand the connection you believed to have with Agent Coulson, but let me assure you that he is in fact dead." He stood and came to stand in front of me. He placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Paige, I placed Phil in your path specifically because of his personality. He was the only person that could get you to open up and helped you to see how much good work you could do with SHIELD." He dropped his hand and moved to the window again.

"Then why wasn't there a funeral?" I asked suddenly. I noticed Fury straighten slightly.

"Director, I did some searching on my last leave. There is no gravesite for Agent Coulson located anywhere in Montana. There are also no records of his ashes being spread anywhere." I added before he could spit out another lie.

Director Fury turned to look at me. I saw a combination of things written on his face; the main thing being anger.

I immediately regretted letting that slip. I'd done some digging on my own, and had used the few connections I had to do more when I hit a brick wall.

"Doctor, you're asking about things that are above your pay grade." He stated calmly, but I could hear the anger under that facade. He moved to sit down at his desk again.

"You gave this pay grade." I replied. "How am I supposed to do my job, and help these people find closure if no one was able to attend his funeral? I personally would have wanted to say my goodbyes. Agent Hill, Banner, every single member of SHIELD would have wanted to pay their respects." I explained as I tried to calm down.

"I know he's not dead, even in the eyes of the government." I locked my gaze with Fury's.

I was teetering on the brink of insubordination, and possibly writing my own pink slip.

"Doctor, are you implying that I covered up Agent Coulson's death, to my own gain? Or that of SHIELD's?" Fury asked me evenly.

"I'm not implying anything. I'm simply stating that the research I found doesn't add up." I said, not breaking my gaze and willing my voice to stay strong.

"You don't have the clearance to back that claim up." He countered.

"No, I don't. But wasn't it just 2 years ago when Tony Stark had hacked into your mainframe in a matter of hours?" I threw back at him.

He closed his eye for a moment. I seriously thought I might get a direct answer from him.

"Did you employ Stark to dig into Coulson's record?" he asked. _Interesting…_

"No, Stark personally doesn't have anything to do with this, but I can guarantee if he had an inkling about this, then he already knows." I sat back down in the chair across from his desk.

I was honestly feeling slightly smug. Maybe I had gotten one step ahead of Fury. I saw the Director nod his head. He turned again to look at me.

"I would appreciate it if that information remained classified." He ordered as opposed to asked.

"Does it serve a greater purpose? Because, the Avengers don't trust you as it is? Do you think that's wise?" I asked. I felt myself losing control of this situation. I reverted to my psychology training.

"Doctor, I have a request of you. Two actually." He replied. _Answer averted. What now?_

"I need a new blood panel done on you." Fury said as he shuffled some papers in front of him.

_Wow, that's a 180. Why…?_

"I just did a current blood panel a month ago. They're required quarterly. What's wrong with mine?" I asked suspiciously.

"Not all the results came back. We'll be docked for three days, I expect that when we pull out, that I will have your current results on my desk." He said as he leaned back in his chair.

"Something is…off. And frankly, I'm concerned." The Director told me.

My mind was racing. Something was wrong with me.

"What do you mean? Am I sick?" I asked, more concerned than I wanted to be.

"Paige, when you spoke with Loki before Thor took him back to Asgard, what happened?" he asked.

I racked my brain; he'd read my report. He knew what happened.

"Nothing; he wouldn't speak to me because a) I'm mortal and b) I'm a woman." I stated simply.

I had gotten nothing from that preliminary meeting with Loki; not that I got much more when I took my little trip to Asgard.

"He didn't give you anything to think on? Didn't somehow bring up any memories that clouded your judgment?" he asked seriously.

"Because if he didn't, then you are the only one he hasn't gotten to." He stated.

"Except for Natasha…and you." I replied.

Fury pinched the bridge of his nose. He took a moment before standing and walking back to the window.

"I don't believe that there is something wrong with you, but maybe something we never caught before. I would prefer we have a more recent sample from you." He said as he turned back around to look at me.

Before I could respond that I would have it taken care of, he jumped back into a line a questioning.

"What is your recommendation concerning Agent Hill?" he asked. I shrugged.

"I believe that she has repressed any feelings regarding her fellow agent's death. I believe that she is a risk to not only herself but others." I stated simply. I walked over and pulled her file out of my briefcase and tossed it on his desk.

"I also believe that she is still fit for active duty, as she has been for the last 24 months. I will no longer be scheduling sessions with her. If she wants to talk about it, well, she knows where to find me." I said with what was left of my interest in her as a patient.

"You're tired of her?" Fury asked knowingly. He moved back to desk and flipped the switch which plummeted us into near darkness again.

I slumped back in my chair and shook my head, even if he couldn't see me. I was exhausted by everything lately, this meeting especially.

"I can't help people that don't want help. I told you that when you assigned me to the Avengers Initiative. People like Stark, who thinks they have no problems except how to spend their money. Dr. Banner…don't get me started." I rolled my eyes again; they were probably getting ready to roll out of my head.

I thought I heard Fury snicker. _Nice. Laugh at my job. Jerk._

"I was under the impression that Stark came to you to make a sizeable donation to your alma mater? And I hear the Dr. Banner prefers a more casual approach to sessions with you. Don't you usually have lunch or dinner with him at least once a week?" he asked pointedly.

I sighed. Of course he knew all this. I nodded slightly. I wanted to add that Banner and I never spoke about anything specific and Stark wanted to make a donation to my university to try and get a new psychologist in here.

"I did get to travel to Asgard. But as you read in my report, Loki was equally unresponsive to my questioning." I sat up and leaned forward. "I am pleased that I seemed to make progress with Natasha and Clint. But seeing as they don't have any ridiculous _"superhuman abilities",_ I think that made all the difference."

I could make out Fury's face in the darkness; he had something to say. He had a project for me.

"I have an assignment for you. I want you to lighten your case load." He said.

I sighed, "my case load is light enough already. And I don't think I have to remind you that I am not an agent. I don't take assignments." I said coolly.

"How is Rogers doing? I know you're familiar with his file?" he asked.

"Sure, born in 1922, was given the experimental super serum, World War 2, Red Skull…yeah, I got all that." I replied.

"How have your sessions been with him?" Fury asked as he moved back to his desk.

"He only came to see me once. Every member of the team was required to see me once. He regretted Phil's "death", but is dedicated to the Avengers and SHIELD. You read my report." I retorted. I had no idea where he was going with this,

"I did. How is acclimating to his new life?" he asked as he picked up a file and placed it on the desk in front of me. I glanced at it and noticed it was labeled _Steve Rogers AKA Capt. America._

"As well as he can. You found him two and half years ago. He's had time to catch up on history, learn about advancements in medicine and technology. Nick, he's over 80 years old, trapped in a 30 year olds body. How do you think he's acclimating?"I said as I picked up the file.

"I've given Rogers a suggestion that he should get to know you. Whether that's professionally or personally, is no concern of mine. He's a solider; he has his orders. I have the uttermost faith that he will follow through." He said as he stood. I knew that was my cue to leave, but I remained in my seat.

"What do you mean "get to know me"? Are you suggesting that I make friend with Rogers?" I asked incredulously.

"I think you both could learn a lot from each other, and frankly I need to know where he stands in his new life." He said.

"Director Fury, I know I don't have to remind you that I am not a soldier. I may be under your employ, but I will not delve into a personal relationship with…Captain America because you want me to!" I wanted to sound forceful; but I had a feeling I sounded like a petulant child.

"Doctor Smith, I believe you and Rogers can gain some insight from each other. I know you understand what Captain Rogers has experienced. Even after all this time, he still needs to catch up to the time he's living in now. "The Director explained.

"Just put yourself in his line of sight, as it were. He keeps a rigorous schedule and he'll be expecting you to come around at some point. I expect a preliminary report within the month." With that he turned and took the same position he had been in when I entered his office.

I slowly stood and packed up the file into my briefcase. I was in over my head as it was; I truly didn't think I was qualified for this job.

I was about to be put to the test.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I know I said I was shooting for an update at once a week, but here's another chapter a little early! I'm really enjoying writing this story and if you're enjoying reading it…then click that follow button and let other know! I'm not an author that holds chapter's hostage for reviews, but I'd love to know what you think! Certain songs keep popping up when I'm writing, so if anyone is interested, I will create a playlist for this story. I hope you enjoy this! Again, many thanks to yagalinus0420! You rock girlfriend!  
**

***Disclaimer…again, I do not own any characters, locations, or plot ideas derived from the Avengers movie, any Marvel comics, and I don't own Steve Rogers….but I'd like the chance to let him own me! ;)**

Chapter 2

Stacey had sent me some messages, just as she said she would to my phone. I checked them as I walked away from Director Fury's office. I had wanted to go to the gym after the day I'd had, but now it seemed like I had homework to do.

As I scrolled through my messages, I didn't see anything out of the ordinary. Just as I was about to exit out of my email program, a new message popped up.

**From V. Potts**

**Subject: Professional opinion**

_Paige,_

_I know we've talked briefly on a few matters before, but I was wondering if I could pick your brain about something. I know you will be docking within the hour; would you be free to come to my office at Stark Tower? If you have other commitments, I understand, but if not I'll be looking for you around 4pm._

_Please let me know if we need to reschedule._

_Pepper_

_P.S. I've secured a suite for you at the Four Seasons. I know that you prefer a little more living space when you can get it._

Well, I thought, this is interesting. I shot off a reply letting her know I would be there as soon as we docked and thanked her for the reservations. Pepper and I had met several times, usually always to discuss Stark's sessions and her concerns about his ego-centric personality. I personally didn't understand what she saw in him. Yes, he was attractive. As he's stated many times before: "Genius, millionaire, playboy, philanthropist". Pepper saw something in him that others didn't. I knew Fury needed him, even respected him. I respected him because he was a philanthropist. He had changed his weapons company into a green energy company; providing sustainable energy at a fraction of the cost. He almost single handedly stimulated the economy and you had to respect that.

Pepper and I had developed a working friendship. I respected her tenacity, and I think she saw me as a younger version of herself; I was determined and worked hard. I'd achieved a lot in my short life, after all the things I'd been through. I even, if truth be told, looked up to Pepper Potts.

I reached my quarters and kicked off my shoes as soon as I entered. I dropped my briefcase on my small dining table and stretched my arms over my head. My room was small, but I was used to small. I didn't have it crammed with a lot of things; mostly because I didn't have much to my name.

I looked over to the only picture I kept in my quarters; my parents and I. I was 6 and had a goofy and awkward smile. I was sitting on my mother's lap and my dad was next to her with his arm draped over her shoulders.

It was the only picture I had of the three of us. They were both dead 6 months after that picture had been taken and I was in the foster care system. I'd like to think that they would have been proud of me, but I honestly couldn't remember much about them. I could remember my mom's laugh. The way the sun caught her auburn hair. I remembered my dad's kind, green eyes and the way his rough hands felt when he would hug me. I guess those things were enough to get me by.

I sat down at my desk and opened my personal email. A few from some former colleagues, probably wondering where I was. One from my former roommate from the dorms at the University of Missouri.

I scanned it quickly; she was getting married and she wanted me to come. The wedding was 8 months from now. I sent a quick reply telling her I'd try to make it.

I scanned the other emails. The Chief of Police in Kansas City knew that I had been recruited for a government job, but he didn't know the details. I had my own private practice, but I was often called upon by the police department to do profiling. I suspected he thought I was working for the FBI. If only he knew.

I sighed as I shut down my laptop and opened my briefcase. There it was glaring at me from the top of the stack, Steve Rogers SHIELD profile. I pulled it out and set it on the table, not ready to actually open it. I thought back to our first meeting.

_20 months ago_

"_ , what brings you here today?" I asked as I sat pen in hand._

_I saw the man they called Captain America. His blue eyes were alert and gorgeous. I could make out his taut muscles under the sleeves of his plaid shirt. His brown leather jacket was draped across the arm of his chair. I could honestly see why people found him attractive; I wasn't blind. But the chiseled features and impressive physique didn't do it for me. Sure they were an added benefit, but those eyes were the feature that was speaking to me._

_He'd seen so much. The Great Depression and the loss of his family. A man that gave him a chance and World War 2. They also held loss and sadness in them, something that was understandable but, I thought unnecessary._

_I wondered if people could see that in my eyes too._

"_Please call me Steve, Ma'am." He replied calmly as he sat relaxed in an armchair across from me._

"_I'm here to talk about Agent Coulson. You know that and I know that." I saw him smirk slightly and I was confused by his demeanor. This didn't seem like the polite man I had read about._

"_We're here specifically to talk about the battle of New York and Agent Coulson's death. I want you to tell me what your feelings are." I commented as I scratched down a few notes on the pad on my lap._

"_I feel like I let him down. It's my fault that he's dead!" He exclaimed._

"_Steve, it's natural to feel guilt. The purpose of this session and any further sessions is to get to the root of the guilt. In my experience a certain event can trigger memories and feelings. I-"_

"_In your experience? Don't talk to me about experience; I'm old enough to be your grandfather." He spat._

_I put my pen down and put the pad of paper on the table between us and looked directly at him._

"_Is that how you feel? Like a grandfather?" I asked calmly. I knew Fury wanted more out of this session than just closure over Phil._

"_I'm 89 years old…isn't that old enough to be a grandfather?" he asked._

"_You live in the body of a 30 year old. Do you have the mind of an 89 year old?" I shot back._

"_No, I don't." he stated with a sigh. I saw his shoulders slump forward slightly._

"_Then why would you say that? Do you feel you should be a grandfather at this point?" I asked, desperately trying to see the root of this problem. _

_Obviously, I knew that had he not taken the Super Serum, he probably would be a grandfather right now. I knew about Peggy Carter and assumed that she fit in here somewhere._

"_That's not the point. An innocent man died. I should have been able to prevent it." He said as he stood to look out my window._

"_Steve, I don't think I really need to remind you, but a lot of innocent people died when Loki came to Earth. Could you have prevented that too?" I asked and stood to pour myself a glass of water. He looked over to my movements and I gestured to the second empty glass. He nodded his head and I poured one for him as well. I picked up the glass and handed it to him._

"_I understand that, but as the Captain of this team, it's my responsibility to ensure my team members come out of the fight safely." He said hotly as he slammed his glass on the table so forcefully, I was surprised it didn't shatter._

"_Steve, the title of Captain was a stage name for you during the war." I said as tactfully as possible as he rolled his eyes at me. "You say you need to ensure your team members safety. What about Bucky?"_

_I knew I was on dangerous ground._

"_Bucky has nothing to do with this." He shook his head. "That was a long time ago."_

"_Regardless of how long ago it was, memories of guilt over Bucky's death would be triggered by Agent Coulson." I stated as I waited as he let this information sink in._

"_Death is my burden to bear Doctor. I have to live the rest of my life, watching people I love and care for die." He said remorsefully._

_Obviously, the man thought he was immortal, but I didn't think it equated to a god complex. He'd survived being frozen in ice for 70 years. His metabolism was 4 times faster than that of a normal human, so his body was able to heal and regenerate itself. _

"_Are you afraid that you won't ever die? That you'll never be at peace with your life?" I asked quietly. I didn't actively think about my death, but I knew very well that it was a basic part of life. I couldn't imagine thinking that I would never die; watching loved ones grow old and die...leaving you alone._

"_If I was going to die, don't you think it would have been in the impact of that ship hitting the ice?" he asked sarcastically._

"_Steve, I don't have those answers for you." I replied sadly. I reached out and hold his hand to comfort him, knowing that I was crossing the line._

"_That's the problem I have Doctor Smith, I don't think you have any answers for me." He said. He grabbed his jacket as he dropped my hand, not before squeezing it lightly._

_I saw another flash of something in his eyes...regret? And with that he was walking out my door._

Captain Rogers never came back to see me. I never sought him out. I felt like I had violated the professionalism of Doctor/Patient by comforting him like that. I was supposed to remain neutral.

The only times I ever saw him was in the gym, but we stayed as far from each other as possible. He was usually lifting weights, while I took over the treadmill or elliptical. If he was using a treadmill, I would go to the weights and do light reps.

We never came across each other in the corridors, but I was privy to some Avengers meetings. Fury usually wanted me there to gauge the members reactions to information they were given. Steve and I never made eye contact. We never directed questions to each other. Banner had asked me about it during one of our weekly meals.

I honestly thought Dr. Banner was trying to start a friendship with me, and I wasn't opposed to that. He was an intelligent man, and I wasn't afraid of him. Many people were, and I think he respected me for it. But when Bruce asked me about Steve, I shut down. First of all, I wasn't prepared for "Paige, what the hell is going on between you and Cap?"

I didn't know how to answer it, so I didn't. I just walked away. Thinking about it now, that was 3 weeks ago and I had been avoiding Bruce since.

I shook my head as I stood up and stretched.I pulled out an overnight bag. If Pepper Potts wanted to pick my brain, then I would use her connections to get a fancy hotel room for myself for the night. I didn't mind living on the Helicarrier, but when I could get away, I did.

I threw in a pair of old ripped blue jeans and a nicer pair of jeans, just in case I decided to go out to dinner instead of ordering room service. I pulled out a black sweater and a green tank top to go under it. I walked to my dresser and grabbed some underwear and socks. I was about to pull some pajamas out when my door beeped.

Who the hell is there? I wanted to scream; sometimes I just wanted to be left alone. Instead I went to the control panel and sighed.

Natasha.

I pushed the button to open the door and there she stood in all her toned glory. Her curly red hair was pulled into a ponytail and she wore jean and a t-shirt that said I heart NY. I smirked at her appearance. She smiled back.

"What's up Doc?" she asked with a twinkle in her green eyes. _Oh, hilarious._

"You need new material, Nat." I said with a laugh as I stepped aside so she could come in. I shut the door behind her.

"Leaving us so soon Paige?" she asked as she eyed my bag. I walked back over to my bed and continued packing.

"I'm taking shore leave, just like everyone else." I said matter of factly. I pulled some old boxer shorts and a wife beater out of my drawers and packed them into my bag.

"Why are you dressed like that?" I asked as I went to my bathroom for my toiletries. I came back out and Natasha was looking out the window. We had started to pull into the harbor. Another 30 minutes and we would be docked.

"Clint, Bruce and I are going out. Do you want to come have dinner with us? Clint's trying to get Steve to join us." she answered as she turned back around.

I shook my head. "No, I have an appointment as soon as we dock." I replied, not wanting to notice the mention of Rogers. "Besides, this sounds more like an Avengers day out to me." I said with a wink.

She laughed. It was a beautiful, throaty sound. I had always had the impression that Natasha never let her hair down, so to speak. But once she opened up to me, I learned that wasn't true; she was just very dedicated and diligent in her job.

"It sounds that way, but it was actually Bruce's idea. He's trying to reacquaint himself around the general population." she said with a shrug.

"Besides, he wanted me to ask you since you seem to be ignoring him. You're not trying to make him angry, are you Doc?" she asked with a smile.

I ignored her question. She knew I was avoiding all the members of the team, and now that Agent Hill was off my schedule, I could do just that.

_Except for Fury's little project..._

"I think he'll do just fine. He knows where his limitations are and like he's admitted himself, it's not a matter of not getting angry," I started saying when she cut me off.

"He's always angry. I know." she rolled her eyes. I laughed; not because Banner's problem was funny, but because she knew all too well how my train of thought was going.

"If you think it's going to be a problem, you can call my cell and I can come and help run interference." I offered.

"Between me and Clint and if we can get the Cap out, I don't think we'll need it. I was asking because I would like to get know you on another level." She said, almost shyly.

Natasha and I had spent plenty of time together. We had always kept things casual; she didn't talk about her past and I didn't talk about mine.

"What are you playing at Natasha?" I asked suspiciously. I waited for her to respond.

"I'm not playing at anything Paige. Why did you immediately go there?" I heard her ask, sounding a little cross.

"I've had a long day. You're just another person suggesting that I make friends and play nice." I replied. I saw Natasha looking at the picture of me with my parents.

"Do you remember them much?" she asked quietly. I walked over and sighed.

"Not really. I was only six when the house burned down. I didn't go on to live with family who could tell me about them." I said as I turned to look at her.

"Look, we're going to have dinner, maybe a few drinks. It wouldn't hurt to expand your horizons a little." she said as if it were the most innocent thing ever.

"Paige, I think you're interesting. You helped me get over a rough patch. Clint speaks highly of you, and Bruce enjoys your company." she said as she moved back to the door.

"Besides, you might even have some fun. I bet we could find a good looking guy for you." she said with a twinkle in her eyes.

I rolled my eyes, "The last thing I need is a hook up." I was racking my brain trying to think of what else I might need for the leave.

"Paige, when was the last time you got laid?" she asked pointedly. I locked my gaze with hers.

"6 months ago, not that it's any of your business. When was the last time you got laid?" I asked defensively.

"About an hour ago." she said with a wink. I laughed, I couldn't help it.

"I'm not saying you need to go out and have a one night stand, but would it kill you to let yourself have some fun?" she asked me, exasperatedly.

I shook my head. I hadn't been out with anyone since the last time we docked in San Francisco 6 months ago. That had been a disaster.

"You might have point, especially after the day I've had. I'll call you later after my meeting. Have a good night." I said as I went to grab my shoes that I had kicked off by the door.

"You too Paige. Oh, and if you're going to see Pepper, I'd dress a lot more casually. She's been off with Tony all day." she smirked and was out the door before I could ask her how she knew about my meeting with pepper.

I shook my head and looked down at my modest pencil skirt and blouse. These people were getting so frustrating! I turned back to my room and pulled the nicer pair of jeans out of my bag and changed into them. I pulled a billowy peasant blouse of my closet. Casual, but nice. I slipped a pair of black flats on and gave myself a once over in the mirror.

Not too bad for 31 years old. I stood at 5'9 with brown hair and hazel eyes. I worked out every morning, and sometimes during the day. Working for SHIELD, you never knew when being in shape would benefit you. I glanced at my midsection, and my slight spare tire. I was conscious of it, but I doubted others noticed.

When I had lived in Kansas City, I was always at home cooking for myself. When and wherever we docked, I usually went out for a lavish meal. The mess hall here on the Helicarrier was definitely lacking. I liked a good meal whenever I could get it.

I tugged my hair into a low ponytail, wishing that I hadn't been so stubborn about growing it out. I had kept my hair short, like a pixie for as long as I could remember. I personally thought it suited me, but I had made the decision to grow it out two years ago. Right after Phil died.

I shook my head and berated myself. It had been two fucking years! I needed to move on. How was I supposed to be a role model to anyone, to help them move past the grieving stage, if I couldn't do it myself?

I grabbed my overnight bag and slung it over my shoulder. I grabbed my briefcase and purse and headed for the door. Once I had locked up I made my way down the corridor to the flight deck.

Protocol dictated that we show our SHIELD ID cards to leave and board the ship. I was digging in my purse looking for my ID when my overnight bag fell off my shoulder.

"Oh, for the love of all things that is holy!" I exclaimed, exasperated. I continued digging through the depths of my purse when I heard a familiar but quiet voice.

"Ma'am, can I give you a hand with your bags?" he asked quietly. I looked up to see none other than Captain America himself looking at me expectantly.

"Mr. Rogers, I appreciate the offer, but I can manage perfectly fine on my own." I answered, slightly more annoyed than I would have preferred.

I instantly regretted my tone when I saw the look in his eyes. Hurt combined with embarrassment. I finally pulled my ID out and straightened up.

"I'm sorry Mr. Rogers. I guess I'm ready to be off this ship." I offered, trying to lighten this situation. But my mind was racing; what is he doing here now? Is this what Fury meant by him seeking me out?

"No apologies necessary, ma'am. Just thought I would offer to help." He said, still looking embarrassed. He looked down to the dock and I followed his line of sight. Dock hands were setting up the planking so we all could go ashore.

"Mr. Rogers, I thought we agreed that the term ma'am was unnecessary?" I said, trying desperately to ease his embarrassment. "Please, call me Paige."

He looked over at me and smiled. I'd be a lying ass if I said he wasn't dreamy. Blue eyes, light brown hair, chiseled features. And the smile, the smile was definitely swoon worthy.

"Paige it is then, but only if you call me Steve again." he replied evenly.

He picked up my overnight bag and handed it to me. I had read his file before, when Fury first brought him into SHIELD. He was born in 1922, the ma'am thing was understandable. So was the offer to help. Although, I would say he got the gist of the feminist movement since he handed my bag to me and didn't try to hold onto it.

"What are your plans for shore leave, Steve?" I asked nonchalantly. I looked up at his 6' frame as he towered over me slightly.

"Dinner plans with Natasha, Clint, and Dr. Banner. What about you?" he asked as he pulled his brown leather jacket on.

"I have a meeting with Pepper Potts, if we ever get off this damn ship." I mumbled. I looked around hoping to get off soon and catch a cab. I'd never make it across town at this rate.

As if he was reading my mind, he chimed in.

"Would you like a ride? I'm headed over to see Tony before dinner." he asked me suddenly. I turned to look at him when he smiled again.

"It's perfectly safe, and I have an extra helmet." he pointed over my shoulder and I turned to see his motorcycle being rolled out on deck.

I took a deep breath. Riding on Captain America's bike, with my arms wrapped around said American Captain. My libido, which had been silent, even after my brief conversation with Natasha, started to speak up. _Do it!_

"I don't know Steve. I've never ridden before and..."I trailed off, mostly because I wasn't sure what to follow up with.

"You don't have to if you don't want to, but trying to catch a cab in rush hour traffic in New York...good luck!" he laughed at that last part.

I sighed because, damnit, he was right. I justified the thoughts in my head.

_He was going the exact same place I was. The bike would probably be quicker than a cab. I was supposed to get close to him, per Fury's orders._

"Alright." I said quietly. He looked down at me again.

"Beg your pardon?" he asked me. I wasn't sure if hadn't heard me or just couldn't believe I had agreed. After all, I had done everything possible to keep my distance. _But so did he._

"I said yes. Thank you Steve, it's very generous of you." I answered, fighting to keep my voice even.

"You're welcome." he said as he grabbed my bag from my shoulder. We go the all clear from the deck crew. We could safely go leave the ship.

"Paige, may I ask you a question?" Steve asked as we moved down to the dock to wait for his bike.

"Of course. What's up?" I asked as I checked my watch for the time.

"Why have we been avoiding each other?" he asked as a member of the flight crew parked his bike in front of us.

I couldn't answer right away, and in my hesitation Steve had managed to pack my overnight bag in one of his saddle bags.

"I'm not sure what you mean, Steve." I said, avoiding his gaze.

"I'm sure you do, Doc." he said as he handed me a helmet. I stared at it and I felt him take my briefcase and purse from me as well and pack them into the bag on the opposite side.

"Do you know how to put that thing on?" he asked, since I had apparently lost the ability to speak.

I shook my head and he stepped close to me and placed the helmet gently on my head. As he began to fit the trap to fit my head, he looked into my eyes.

"Paige, there isn't reason for us to behave this way. I know now you were only doing your job and trying to help me." he said as he adjusted the head gear.

"Steve, I...I'm sorry." I said as he finished and took a slight step back. "I shouldn't have behaved that way; it was completely unprofessional." I said as I looked up into his eyes.

"I'm sorry too." he said as he stepped over to the bike and swung a leg over. He deftly gave it a kick start and I was surprised at the thrill I felt at hearing the engine rev.

"Climb on. We've got places to be." he said simply.

I copied his actions and swung my leg over and situated myself behind him. I was about to wrap my arms around him when he looked over his shoulder.

"Hold on tight. We won't go too fast, but you'll want a good grip." he said with a smile. "If I'm going too fast for you or you feel sick, just squeeze my thigh."

"Why should I squeeze your thigh?" I asked, slightly perplexed.

"So, I'll feel it over the vibration of the bike." he said with a laugh. "Ready?"

I shrugged, "As I'll ever be."

He turned back around and started to move slowly through the small crowd of dock crew. I turned and looked back towards the Helicarrier and was positive I could see Director Fury standing on the deck, arms crossed over his chest, smiling.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hello all! Another update for you! We currently have had over 200 views of this story...if you're lurking in the background...come play with us...I promise I don't bite! :) Again, if you are enjoying this so far, please review! I would love to hear some feedback! Again many thanks go to yagalinus0420 for being a fantastic beta and friend! Also, I want to extend my thanks to ym4yum1: she has given me a lot of insight with her mad research skills! She wrote a sweet one-shot, and you should check her out!**

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

True to his word, Steve didn't drive too fast through the streets of New York. He weaved in and out of traffic with ease, and I realized that I was enjoying this ride. It was exhilarating to feel like I was flying through the city. I usually hated when motorcycles drivers weaved through traffic; I just thought it wasn't safe. But the way Steve handled his bike; let's just say I felt perfectly safe.

He pulled up in front of Stark Tower and drove into the underground parking garage and parked in a designated spot for motorcycles. He propped up the kickstand and cut the engine. He patted my hands that were wrapped around his waist and slowly released him.

I climbed off the bike and stood on shaky legs and removed my helmet. Steve copied my movements and was standing next to me.

"Well?" he asked while pulling my bags out. He set them on the ground at our feet.

"That's was amazing! Thank you!" I exclaimed as I passed my helmet over to him. He chuckled as he packed both the helmets away. I picked up my purse and briefcase while Steve reached down to carry my overnight bag.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it. You can ride with me anytime you want." he offered sincerely.

"Thanks. Shall we?" I asked as I gestured towards the elevators.

We made the short walk and Steve punched the button and we waited for the ride to come to us. The contraption beeped and we stepped inside. I chuckled lightly as I looked at the control panel. 23 floors, with the penthouse on the top. There was a little brass plaque with the initials _T.S. _engraved next to a key hole; Tony Stark's private quarters.

"Where are you meeting Miss Potts?" Steve asked, his hand hovering over the buttons.

"Her office is on the 22nd floor." I said. "Where are you meeting Mr. Stark?" I asked when I noticed he hadn't requested another floor.

"I have no idea where Stark is, but I'm sure Pepper does." he said with a grin.

The elevator moved swiftly upwards. I tried to catch a glimpse of the Cap from under my lashes, when he spoke up.

"I'm sorry for earlier Paige." he said quietly. I reached out and laid my hand on his arm.

"There's no need to apologize." I said as I removed my arm when I felt the rippled muscles under his sleeve.

"I assumed that you weren't interested in furthering our professional relationship after our session. I should always make myself available to my patients." I said when he cut me off by shaking his head.

"Doctor, I'm not your patient." he said forcefully. I regretted that term; patient would imply my seeing him my office more often.

"We're team members. We work together. We don't need to walk on eggshells around each other." he stated firmly.

I was taken aback; I knew full well I was considered part of the Avengers team, but I didn't go on missions with them. I was about to defend my thoughts when he spoke up again.

"Paige, you're an important part of the team, even if you don't fight with us. You fight for us...you help us fight ourselves when we need to." he said as the elevator doors opened.

I would have responded had Pepper not been standing there in front of us.

"Oh, Paige! I'm so glad to see you. Thank you for coming to see me in your off time." Pepper said as she extended her hand to me.

I stepped out of the elevator and shook her hand warmly. It was always nice to see Pepper. She had a calming presence about her, and she was sharp as a whip.

"My pleasure Pepper. It's nice to be off the ship, to be honest." I said.

"Captain Rogers, how are you?" Pepper asked as Steve followed me off the elevator.

"Well Ma'am, how are you?" He asked politely. He was still holding my bag and I desperately wanted to take it from him so we could all get on with our business.

"I'm fine, and please call me Pepper." she replied with a slight blush. "Tony's in the penthouse, I'll send you up."

She stepped in the elevator and inserted her key to send Steve to the top floor.

"Thank you Pepper. See you later Paige." he said.

I nodded, "Thanks again for the ride Steve." I said. "Oh, my bag!" I exclaimed.

He grinned and tossed it to me before the doors closed between us. I noticed Pepper's eyebrows raised in question.

"Later Pepper." I stated firmly. She turned and started walking down the hallway. I sped up slightly to catch up to her.

"Happy will take your bag over the hotel. I've already checked you in." she said as we kept walking. We made it to her office doors where I saw Happy Hogan sitting and reading a paper. He jumped up and folded the paper.

"Nice to see you again Doctor Smith. I'll leave your room key at the front desk." he said. I handed him my bag.

"Thanks you Mr. Hogan. How are you?" I asked genuinely. I liked Happy whenever I got to see him. He was jovial and friendly, and completely devoted to Tony Stark.

"Just fine Doc. I'll see you later." He said as he walked back in the same direction we had just come from.

"Let's go inside and talk." Pepper said as she opened her door. I followed her in and immediately noticed her view, just like I always did.

"Can I get you something to drink? Coffee?" Pepper asked as she sifted through some mail on her desk.

"Whatever you're having is fine. How are things going here, Pepper? "I asked as I sat down on the brown suede couch. Pepper was busying herself at the coffee maker.

"Things are going well. Our sustainable energy program is progressing well. Tony has a clean bill of health..." she turned to look at me. "As clean as it can be." she added with a smile.

"Those are all good things." I said as she came and sat in the armchair next to the couch. She sighed as she sat down and I saw her toe off her shoes.

"What did you want to talk about Pepper?" I asked in a more formal manner than I planned.

She smiled at me, "Paige, I didn't ask you her as a psychologist."

I leaned back against the soft cushions and ran my hands through my hair.

"I think I found him." she said as I stared at the ceiling. I glanced over at her and she was smiling softly.

When I first read the official report regarding Phil Coulson and his death and burial, I couldn't believe it. I never doubted the fact that he confronted Loki and was it ended badly; he would have done anything to give the Avengers a step up against him. It all came back to his death and the funeral, or lack thereof.

I originally came to Pepper, because obviously she had resources available to her that were out of my reach. I just wanted her to find out if there was information that wasn't included in the report. She agreed readily, because she considered Phil a friend. She had been involved with him and this game much longer than me. I honestly thought when I hadn't heard from her about it that it meant she never found anything.

I leaned forward, "What do you mean?"

She stood up and went to the coffee maker and poured two cups. I watched as she poured the cream into mine. She always remembered how I liked it. When she turned to walk back towards us she finally answered.

"I found a trail. SHIELD was very careful to erase a paper trail and a digital one, but I found something." she said as she handed me my cup.

My hands were shaking as I took it from her. I set it down immediately on the small table in front of me.

"Pepper, I..." I couldn't form words. I needed a minute to collect my thoughts.

"Paige, I never thought I'd find him, but I set up some facial recognition software to search for him across the globe." she started when we were abruptly interrupted.

"She used my software, and didn't bother to tell me what she was doing." Tony Stark announced as he entered Pepper's office.

Pepper had the decency to look embarrassed, but I was angry.

"Doc, before you start spouting off to me about privacy rights, keep in mind that you asked my...asked Pepper to spy on someone for you." he said as he took up the armchair his better half had previously occupied.

"And she was using my software." he said smugly. "Pepper, didn't you think I would notice?" He looked up to where she was standing.

"Stark, don't try to play that you're hurt to either of us. Pepper has known you long enough to know better; it would be insulting." I said as I finally picked up my cup to take a drink.

"And what would insult you, Doctor Smith?" he asked, amusement in his eyes.

"If you were truly mad, you would have blocked Pepper's access and she and I wouldn't have had this conversation. You're just as curious as I am." I shot back at him.

"Actually, I'm more curious about your relationship with _the star-spangled man with a plan_." he said with what I could only see as an evil smirk.

"Mr. Stark, my personal life is none of your business. But let me assure you that I don't have a relationship with Mr. Roger, other than our working one." I said as I set my cup back down.

"You work for SHIELD, you don't have a personal life anymore, Doc." he stood and walked over to where Pepper was standing.

"Tony, I wanted to tell you, but I know how you get about Phil." Pepper said softly. She tugged on the lapels of his coat.

"If you had told me, I would have been able to help you find him a year ago...like I did." he replied.

I jumped out of my seat and crossed over to them.

"You found him a year ago? How long had you been looking for him?" I asked incredulously.

Tony turned to look at me, "You weren't the only one who considered Agent Coulson a friend Paige." he answered. "I'll leave you two hens to talk. If you'd like my information, it's already in your email Pepper." He started to walk back towards the door.

"Pepper, dinner later?" he asked with a wink. "Oh, and Doctor, there's a man in my office who wants to be your friend. Maybe it's time to stop chasing the dead." He gave me a pointed look and walked out without another word.

Pepper looked at me and I could see she was trying to decide which topic to discuss first.

"Paige, I had no idea he was already on to us." Pepper explained as I walked back to the table to pick up my cup.

"It's ok Pepper. We knew he'd figure it out sooner than later." I said as I walked to the floor-to-ceiling windows behind her desk.

"My real concern is how much longer he'll keep it quiet." I murmured. Pepper came to stand next to me.

"If he found something a year ago, and is just bringing it up now, he's not going to go blabbing about it." She said as she looked out over the skyline with me.

I snorted loudly.

"Maybe I should talk to him about it tonight to make sure." She offered. I nodded.

"I've already been verbally reprimanded today by Fury for bringing it up. Let's try to keep it quiet for as long as possible." I reached into my pocket and pulled out a flash drive.

"Let's see what he's got." I said as I handed it to her. She walked over to her desk and sat. She quickly pulled up her email.

"Tony says he's encrypted everything, so you can read this on your computer without SHIELD finding out." She explained as she hooked up my drive to a USB port.

Her phone vibrated on her desk. She picked it up and read her new text message aloud.

"Tony says that the key word is 'scotch'. Oh, and that Steve is wondering if you'll need a ride anywhere later." she said as she set her phone down and clicked open the file.

With a few clicks she had it transferring itself and looked up at me with expectant eyes.

"Not you too, Pepper." I moaned. I walked away from her desk and set my coffee cup by the machine.

"Why is Captain America asking you if you need a ride?" she asked me curiously.

"He gave me ride over here, since he had a meeting with Stark." I said with a shrug.

"Tony didn't have a meeting with him." Pepper said, confused.

"You didn't seem surprised to see him with me. And you sent him up to the penthouse..." I trailed off.

"Every member of the Avengers team has explicit permission to come and see Tony whenever they want." Pepper told me. "Tony will leave meetings to see whoever might show up."

I took a seat in one of the chairs opposite her desk. I was trying to decide if I could continue to confide in Pepper. So far, I'd only come to her about Phil and my reservations concerning his death.

"Fury wants me to be friends with Steve." I finally blurted out. I hadn't planned on telling Pepper anything, but there it was.

"Don't you want to be friends with him?" Pepper asked me. I looked up to see her looking at me intently.

"Well, I don't know Pepper! I never really had any friends growing up and I've spent a lot of time not pursuing relationships with people because of my job." I explained. That was the excuse I'd used for years.

The truth was I was afraid. The last people I was close to, my parents, died. Phil was killed, just after I came onboard with The Avengers; I wasn't sure how I would deal with losing anyone else.

"Paige, what would be so bad about you and Steve having a friendship or even a relationship?" Pepper asked as she pulled my flash drive from her computer and slid it across the desk to me.

I narrowed my eyes and looked at the attractive redhead across from me. Pepper looked at me expectantly with her blue eyes shining. He freckles looked bolder, like she had recently gotten some sun. Her ginger hair was pulled up into a neat bun that she wore so effortlessly.

"Pepper, I know better to assume that you didn't dig into my personal background; whether it was Tony that asked you before our first session or you doing it on your own." I said as I picked up the flash drive and fiddled with it.

"What I know about you I learned from you Paige. Yes, Tony did ask me to look into you, but everything I found went directly to him." she told me as she leaned back in her chair.

"I have some ideas though." she trailed off. I looked up to her and realized that if I counted anyone as a friend, it was this woman across from me.

She never pushed and she never made me feel uncomfortable. Even when one of us had the upper hand, I always felt like we were on even ground. I knew I had opened up to her and of course, she would have come to _some _realizations.

"You told me you lost your parents when you were young and got placed into the foster care system because you had no other living relatives." she said quietly, watching me. I nodded and she continued.

"I've gathered that it was difficult to make friends that way, shuffling from one home to another. Were you close to anyone?" she asked as she handed me a tissue. I hadn't realized that I was crying.

"No. I didn't see the point. The first home I was placed in had 6 other foster kids. No one really got the attention they deserved. As I got older, I was shuffled and ignored." I stood and began pacing.

"I think that's why I studied so hard. If I could get the best grades and apply for as many scholarships as possible, someone would have to pay attention to me." I stopped and looked directly at her.

"And it worked! I got a full ride to the University of Missouri and excelled. I was so wrapped up in my studies and being the best, that friendships and relationships weren't important anymore." I shoved my hands into the back pockets of my jeans and rocked back and forth on the balls of my feet.

"Then Phil showed up, after all those years of you being alone, and became your friend without you even realizing it." Pepper said as she stood and moved towards me.

"Paige, were you and Phil...involved?" Pepper asked as she placed a hand on my shoulder.

I shook my head, "No. Phil was a mentor, like a brother to me."

"I didn't think so. Can I hug you?" Pepper asked as she turned me to look at her. I nodded, suddenly lost for words.

She came and wrapped her arms around my shoulders and lightly patted my back. A leaned into her embrace and wrapped my arms around her waist and cried.

I cried for the loss of my family and childhood. I cried for all those years that I not alone felt alone, but let myself shy away from people that were probably put in my life for a reason. But most of all, I cried for Phil and the loss of my first true friend.

I heard Pepper softly encouraging me and as I calmed down she released me. She looked into my eyes and for the first time, I felt alright; like not everything was going wrong.

"Thank you Pepper." I said as I dried my eyes with my tissue. I laughed lightly.

"Paige, maybe this assignment isn't just a way for Fury to find out how Steve is doing. Maybe it's a way for you to come out of your shell." Pepper said as she walked back towards her desk.

I took a huge breath and slowly released it. Pepper had a point; maybe letting someone is, even if it was Steve Rogers, wasn't just for Fury and SHIELD's benefit. If I could get closer to members of the Avengers team, maybe I would be able to help more of them.

"You might have a point Pepper." I said as I went over to the couch and picked up my briefcase and purse.

"I always do, Paige." she replied with a smirk.

"Oh, Pepper. Can I come by tomorrow and meet with one of your doctors?" I asked suddenly, remembering my earlier conversation with Director Fury.

"Sure, is there a problem?" she asked concerned.

"Apparently, my blood panel is insufficient." I explained what I had been told during my meeting with Fury.

"Why are they just catching that something's off now?" Pepper wondered.

"I have no clue. Will they be able to get my results before I have to be back on board?" I asked as I dug around in my purse for my phone.

"Sure, why don't you come by tomorrow morning; say 10 o'clock?" Pepper said as she inputted the information into her phone.

I nodded as I was scrolling through my phone looking for Natasha's contact. I was going to call her and tell her I was coming to dinner. I was ready.

"Ladies, I seem to not be interrupting yet again." Tony said as he glided into the room, without knocking again.

"Oh, Mr. Stark, Pepper and I were just finishing up." I said coolly. I didn't want him to look at me and see that I was crying. I sniffed softly and he turned to away from gazing at Pepper to look at me.

I blushed as soon as I saw his eyes searching mine. I looked down at my feet, automatically embarrassed to be seen as vulnerable. I felt his finger tilting my chin up so I was forced to look at him.

"Red rimmed eyes are not a good look for you, Paige." the Iron Man murmured softly. "I miss him too." He released my chin and I nodded.

"But that information is classified and if you share that with anyone...well...I'll have to kill you." he winked at me and I smiled at Pepper.

"Thanks again Pepper. See you tomorrow." I said as I moved towards the door.

"That's what friends are for Paige!" she called as I stepped out of her office and shut the door behind me.

I leaned against it and took a deep breath. When I exhaled I almost choked when I realized Steve was standing there, hands in his pockets, just staring at me.

"Oh, Steve! I'm sorry; I didn't realize you were here." I said as I tried to recover. He grinned as I blushed and tried to catch my breath.

"Did your meeting with Pepper go well?" he asked as we continued to stare at each other. I was excited about the information that I now had about Phil. I would just need the time to go over everything.

I looked up to meet Steve's eyes and he looked genuinely interested. I wondered if Stark had told him anything. I had the feeling that Steve would be outraged to find out that SHIELD had covered up Phil's death. I knew that, realistically, if I allowed myself to get involved with Steve or anyone involved with the Avengers for that matter, I would have to come clean about Phil.

I hated that SHIELD and Fury had lied to me, and I'd be damned if I would do that to other people. I just needed to go through all the information before I could share anything.

"It went well." I gestured down the hall and we started making our way to the elevator.

"How was your meeting with Stark?" I asked, waiting for an answer. Steve shrugged his shoulders and looked down at me sheepishly.

"I didn't have a scheduled meeting with Stark. I...I just thought I would offer the ride." He stuttered. "I didn't think you'd accept if you knew I wasn't really headed here."

We reached the elevator and he pushed the down button.

"Steve, if we're going to be friends, we have to be honest with each other." I said, hoping I wouldn't be eating my words shortly. The doors to the elevator opened and I stepped into the lift.

"Are we going to be friends, Doctor?" Steve asked me, hesitating to step over the threshold.

I laughed, "Sure. After all, I can't keep asking for rides from you without us being friends."

He smiled and stepped into the lift with me. He pressed the button to take us into the parking garage. Steve was looking up at the ceiling and I couldn't help but admire his features, once again.

I was attracted to the blue eyes and sandy hair. The chiseled jaw line and cheek bones. I knew what he looked like without his shirt on; I'd seen him the gym enough times.

"If you keep looking at me like that Paige, I won't be able to look at you like my friend for very long." I heard the Captain say under his breath and I felt myself flush. He turned to look at me and smiled. I smiled back and wondered when I had decided to let my walls come down, when I had realized I needed companionship. I felt my long forgotten phone vibrate in my hand. I glanced down at the screen and saw Clint Barton's contact information.

"It's Barton." I said as I slid my thumb across the screen and answered the call.

"Hello Clint." I looked up at Steve, but his expression was unreadable.

"_Doc, are you coming to meet us for dinner? Because Tasha is starting to get real annoying. She keeps talking about how she wants you to meet up with us and OW!" _Clint was rambling and it sounded like the Black Widow had had enough.

I laughed as I imagined Natasha whacking Clint upside his head. Steve looked at me crossly and stepped out of the elevator as soon as the doors opened. I followed him and had to rush slightly to keep up.

"Clint, tell Natasha that I will be there shortly. Just text me your location." I said. "By the way, is Roger's coming? I know Natasha said you were going to invite him." I leveled a look at the Cap when he turned as soon as I said his name.

"_I called him, but no response. Doc, can you just get here before Natasha goes on a rampage?" _he asked before he hung up on me.

"So friend...Why the sour puss?" I asked as we stood by his bike.

"Oh, uh..."he stalled looking everywhere but my eyes. "I guess you have plans."

"Steve, if you had answered your phone, you would know that you have plans too." I replied as I told him about dinner with several other members of our team.

"I figure we run by the hotel so I can drop my briefcase off and then go and meet them." I smiled as I reached for the helmet I had worn earlier. "What do you say?" I managed to strap the helmet on by myself and look to Steve eagerly.

He quickly pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket and started scrolling through.

"Three missed calls from Clint, two from Natasha, and 2 texts' from Banner." He said sheepishly.

I smiled and grabbed his helmet and handed it to him. When he finally took it, I packed my briefcase and purse into the saddle bags.

"I guess we're going to dinner together, huh Paige?" Steve asked me as he swung himself onto his bike.

I grinned and copied his movements and settled myself behind him. I wrapped my arms around his waist and raised my voice as he started off the bike.

"Seems that way Steve." I managed to get out before we were taking off out of the garage.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**A/N: Again, many many thanks to yagalinus0420 for all her help and ym4ym1 for keeping me centered in the original stories! I don't usually post a new chapter if I don't have the next one ready to go, but I woke up this morning inspired to write and post! As always, i would love to hear your take on this little piece of insanity that is consuming me! **

Dinner had been nice if not quiet. We met Clint, Natasha, and Banner at a small Mexican restaurant that had a back room we could sit in and not be too bothered. I wasn't recognizable, but unfortunately Steve and even Bruce were to some degree. I had the feeling Natasha preferred to be away from the larger dining room after her years of espionage, and Clint had a hard time focusing on the present company if too many people were around.

"It has been too long since I had decent Mexican food." Bruce all but moaned as he took another huge bite of his enchilada.

I grinned as I sipped on my blended margarita. I had never been a huge fan of Mexican, but it beat Shawarma in my book. I knew it was somewhat of a tradition for the Avengers, I just didn't have a taste for it. I was picking at what was left of my beans and rice when Natasha spoke up.

"So Paige, finish your story." she prompted me. I had been telling them about how I felt when I first left Kansas City and joined SHIELD. Our first port had been Los Angeles; I thought KC had been a big city, I was so wrong.

"Where was I? Oh, so I pick up a map of LA and think I can walk and do some sightseeing and make it back to the ship before we left port." I started laughing; I had been so naive and young.

"Fury sent Agent Hill to pick me up. She used the GPS in my phone and came barreling onto the sidewalk on Hollywood Blvd." Everyone laughed with me.

"Maybe that's why she doesn't like me." I added as I signaled to the waiter to bring me another drink.

"I don't think it's a matter of her not liking you." Clint spoke up. I quirked an eyebrow at him in question.

"I think you represent something she'd rather not relive or think about." he replied. The table grew quiet and I suddenly wished I hadn't come out.

I slung my purse over my shoulder and stood up abruptly. Before anyone could say anything to me, I made my way past the bar and out a side door. I wound up in an alley and tried to collect my breath. I reached into my purse and pulled out an old and slightly crumbled pack of cigarettes.

I knew it was a disgusting habit, but I had picked it up when I lived in Kansas City. I hadn't touched one in 18 months, but I always carried them with me. I guess it spoke to my willpower. I pulled one out and put it between my lips and lit it with my lighter; willpower be damned. I sucked on the filter and felt the smoke invade my lungs.

"I'm sure I don't need to tell you that Doctor's have declared cigarettes harmful to your health." I heard a voice say amusingly behind me. I turned to see Bruce closing the door gently behind him.

"I know it's awful, but sometimes I can't control my urge." I smirked, implying he wasn't the only one that struggled.

Bruce laughed humorlessly and came to stand in front of me. I blew out a stream of smoke as much away from his face as possible.

"I won't insult you by offering one." I said as I slid the pack and lighter back into my purse.

I knew Bruce never drank alcohol, nor took any drugs or smoked. He said he wanted to keep his body pure. I really thought it was because he didn't want to alter any part of his mind and trigger the _other guy_.

"You know Paige; I had hoped that by you agreeing to come to dinner tonight, we might get to know each other on a more personal level." He said as he looked me over, appraisingly.

To say I was shocked would have been an understatement. I had never had an inkling that Bruce could be remotely attracted to me, in any way. I respected Bruce and I admired him. He was only a few years older than me, and while we weren't in the same field of study, we had both worked hard for our titles and recognition we received. Although, I would agree it was unfortunate that his was due to the green monster alter-ego known as _The Hulk. _

"I was disappointed to see you and Rogers' show up together." he said as he licked his lips and stepped closer to me.

"Well, like I said earlier, we were both at Stark Tower and headed here." I replied, trying to keep my calm. I was getting increasingly nervous and desperately wished I hadn't walked out into a deserted alley.

I had never been intimidated or scared of Bruce before. Even when watching the footage from the battle of New York, I wasn't afraid of the Hulk...I was fascinated. To know Bruce and talk with him, I had an idea at the kind of control he possessed. He had never shown me any signs of losing it before now.

I took a self conscious step backward and Bruce moved with me. He was so close that even in the dimly lit alley; I could see his usually brown eyes looking more hazel, as if they were turning green. That's when I really started panicking. As my breathing became shallower, Bruce took notice and leaned in even closer to me.

He reached up and cupped my face so gently, but when I locked my eyes with his I saw exactly the opposite. My hands were trembling and my long forgotten cigarette fell to the ground.

"Bruce..." I whispered searching his eyes. "Please don't do this, please don't hurt me." I was pleading; I had never heard my voice sound like this before.

"Paige, I don't want to hurt you." he murmured roughly. Bruce continued to hold my gaze and I saw the green flash vividly in his eyes. I let out a sob I hadn't realized had crept up into my throat.

As soon as the sound escaped, Bruce sprung back and was staring at his hand. I heard his labored breaths and tried to see what he was looking at. His fingers looked wet and shiny and I instinctively reached up to touch my face. As soon as my fingertips met my cheek I realized I had been crying.

Bruce looked up at me and at once, I saw those same familiar and friendly eyes I had come to know. I started to take a step towards him and he put his hands in front of him defensively.

"Paige, I'm sorry. I...I don't know what happened." Bruce stammered. I noticed he was continuing to back away from me. His entire body was shaking like he was convulsing or having some kind of seizure. He was breathing deeply and I thought he was on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Bruce, I'm fine. Let's just talk this through." I said, trying desperately to regulate my voice.

"NO!" the _other guy _roared at me. "Stay away Paige. I have to get out of here." He exclaimed as he tore off down the alleyway and towards the street.

"Bruce! Bruce!" I called after him, begging him to turn around and come back. After a few moments I realized he wasn't coming back. I exhaled and ran a hand through my hair.

_What the fuck just happened?_ I racked my brain trying to come up with an answer. I dug around in my purse and pulled out my pack of cigarettes and lighter. I had raised the filter to my lips, but couldn't seem to get my thumb to work the lighter.

The restaurant door swung open and I saw a figure standing in the shadows.

"There you are! Trying to skirt out of the check?" Steve asked as he walked towards me. I relaxed slightly, but couldn't meet his eyes. I could feel him staring at me intently and I wanted so badly to wrap my arms around him and have him hold me.

"I know you could probably lecture me on the dangers of these things, but I can't seem to get a light. Would you mind?" I asked as I opened my palm to display the BIC.

He took it slowly and slid his thumb over the guarded spark wheel and cupped his free hand around it to protect the flame. I leaned in and inhaled the smoke. I stepped back and exhaled; watching the smoke linger around my face.

"Bucky smoked." Steve said carelessly. I hummed in response. I knew he was trying to distract me; biding his time before he could ask what was wrong. "I didn't know you smoked, Doc."

I shrugged, "I don't usually. It's a bad habit I picked up when I was working in Kansas City; this is my second one in 18 months." I added quickly.

"Why are you smoking, Paige?" He asked me quietly. I was still avoiding his eyes; I didn't want him to see that I had been crying.

"I usually do when I'm stressed out." I answered flippantly. I flicked the butt to the ground and stomped it out. I was usually more concerned about littering, but it was the furthest thing from my mind at the moment.

"Look I'm tired and I think I've had enough to drink." I pulled my wallet out of my purse and shoved a few bills into Steve's hand. "This should more than cover my meal."

It was at that moment I looked into Steve's eyes. I saw confusion immediately replaced by concern.

"Have you been crying? Did something happen between you and Banner?" he asked quickly. I instinctively took a step backwards.

"I'm just tired Steve. I'm going back to the hotel." I said as I turned on my heel and quickly made my way towards the street.

I knew if he wanted to Steve could easily catch up to me. I heard him calling my name and begging me to come back. I prayed that my abrupt departure had caused enough confusion that he didn't think to run after me.

Once I reached the street I flung my hand in the air and a taxi pulled over almost immediately. I crawled inside the backseat and gave the cabbie my destination. I leaned my head back against the seat and closed my eyes. Instead of the calming blackness I was so used to behind my lids, all I could see was Bruce's brown eyes flashing green.

I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands as the taxi pulled in front of the hotel. I handed him a wad of money and stepped out onto the curb. It was May, but there was a cool breeze that I tried to enjoy for a moment.

I shook my head and swiftly made my way through the lobby and to the elevators. I was happy to find that it was either too early or too late in this bustling city to have to share the tiny space with other passengers. All I could focus on was getting to my room.

The elevator doors opened when it reached my floor and as I stepped out I was suddenly exhausted. Whatever adrenaline had been coursing through my body had left and I felt drained. I fished my room key out of my pocket and stopped dead in my tracks when I saw a masculine form sitting on the floor leaning against my door.

Steve looked up in my direction and jumped up immediately. He ran a hand through his hair in a boyish manner that had me questioning why I had wanted him to hold me just a short time ago.

"Paige, talk to me please?" he begged as I reached the door. Steve stood blocking my path, and I wasn't sure if it wasn't intentional.

"Steve, I'm tired. I just want to go to sleep, please?" I started to plead. He shook his head severely.

"Not until you tell me what happened." he stated simply. "What happened between you and Banner tonight?" I sighed; he wasn't going to let up. I idly thought of trying to distract him somehow, but with exhaustion setting it, it was as if I couldn't think clearly.

"I don't want to talk about it." I said as I made a move to shove past him, but he kept blocking my path.

"Paige, aren't we supposed to be friends?" I nodded sedately; I knew what he was trying to do.

"Then you need to let me in." he said firmly as he jabbed a pointed finger in my direction and I flinched back. I shook my head and pushed past him. I slipped my key card into the reader when I heard him behind me.

"What did he do to you Paige? Please tell me." I heard him quietly. I opened the door and I heard him follow me inside. I flopped on my bed and felt the softness of the bedspread comforting me.

"Can we talk about it later Steve? Please?" I asked as I propped myself up on my elbows. "All I want to do is take a hot bath and go to sleep." He stared at me for a long moment and finally stepped to the French doors that led to the suite's terrace.

"I'll be out here when you're done. We can talk then." he said as he let himself outside.

I thought about the slew of profanities I could hurl at him or even locking the doors behind him. But it appeared the Captain was just as stubborn as I was. I sighed as I sat up and took off my shoes.

I walked over to my overnight bag and pulled out my pajamas and a pair of fresh underwear and walked to the bathroom. I realized I still had my purse slung over my shoulder and I removed it and set it on the counter with a plop. I moved to the tub and turned on the faucet. Once I had the temperature set and the stopper in place I went back to the vanity.

It was when I looked into the mirror and saw my reflection that I understood why Steve had been so concerned. My eyes were red and my face blotchy from tears. I grabbed a washcloth and ran it under cold water from the faucet. I patted my face and moved to turn the water off over the tub. I stripped down and reached for the hair band that I always wore on my left wrist to put my hair up.

I grabbed a hand towel and my phone from inside my purse and set them both on the edge of the tub. I stepped in and lowered myself into the water. I let myself lay there for a few minutes, enjoying the almost weightless feeling. The light on my phone was blinking, notifying me of everything I had missed this evening.

I dried my hands on the towel and picked up my phone. I had never enjoyed having such an advanced piece of technology in my hands before, but I really did enjoy this phone from Stark Industries; although I was pretty sure that Tony could eavesdrop on every conversation or text I received from the comfort of his office.

I selected my call log and saw that I had half a dozen missed calls from Steve, one from Natasha, and one from Stark himself. I went to my voicemail and after entering my pass code, heard Steve pleading with me through four messages to please call him. Natasha asking me if I had finally decided to break my six month streak and if Banner was in on it. I cringed and knew that I would have to tell her something soon; just not tonight. I finally waded through to the message from Tony.

"_Pepper has informed me that you would like to take advantage of our medical staff." _He paused and I heard the distinct clinking of ice in a glass. "_I'm sure there's a fantastic and boring reason for that. Please be here at __9 am__...we'll have a meal together and discuss your reasons." _He was quiet again and I almost thought he had forgotten to hang up when he spoke up again.

"_We also need to talk about this evening, Paige. I have some concerns."_

And with that the message was over. I stared at my phone and felt myself starting to panic. How did he know what had happened tonight? My thoughts immediately went to Steve. He didn't know what happened...yet. He assumed that Bruce and I had words or an altercation, and I wondered if he would contact other members of the team to inform them.

I shook my head and sighed. I had been able to do a basic psych profile on him and I knew that if he didn't have all the information he would wait to take action.

I leaned my head back and I thought back to my time before SHIELD. I had a thriving practice and was freelancing with the local police department. I missed those times; even if they hadn't been very exciting. I felt fulfilled there. But I hadn't formed any friendships. I had acquaintances and working friendships, but no one that I called to have dinner with or go to the movies.

Phil Coulson had changed that for me. When he first approached me, all I saw was a simple black suit and a government demeanor. I remembered being more than surprised when he came to me offering a job within the government. I never applied for such job and I had just opened my own practice 6 months before.

But Phil put himself into my life. At first I was wary; here was some strange man who I thought was following me and offering me a high profile job. But every time I declined, he was friendly, constantly telling me that I was the ideal candidate. I couldn't imagine how I was.

"_Doctor Smith, we believe you are the ideal person for the job. We aren't looking at anyone else." he told me calmly while we sat on a bench in a park a few blocks from my office. _

"_Phil, we've been over this. I have just opened my own practice and I'm working with local PD a lot. Why should I give this success up for a job I didn't seek out and that you can't tell me too much about?" I asked with a smile. He grinned at me and stood up to stretch. _

_I looked up at him and wondered how the stereotype of government agents had gotten so cold. Phil was even tempered and even funny. I had only known him for several weeks, but I could tell that he was an honest man, even if he couldn't always be forthcoming. _

"_Just think about it Paige. It would be an incredible opportunity for you." He took his sunglasses out of his jacket pocket and slipped them on. I stood and we started the walk back to my office. _

"_Why am I so ideal?" I asked as we made our way down the street. I had already asked this question several times and gotten a noncommittal answer. _

_Phil stopped walking and looked at me. I stood next to him wondering, hoping he would finally give me a little more information. _

"_Because you've got heart and determination; we need more people like you." He said it so simply that it took me by surprise. He started walking again and I grabbed his arm to stop him._

"_What does that mean?" I asked quickly. Maybe I would finally get some answers. _

_He took his sunglasses off and looked at me seriously._

"_I would think that you would have guessed that we did a background check on you." I nodded. I had assumed as much, it was a government job after all. I knew what my background would produce. _

"_Your parents died when you were six and you had no other family to take you in. You got through high school with a 4.0 GPA and received a full ride to Mizzou. You found yourself a job and put yourself through school, with no outside support system." I nodded and noted that he sounded as if he was reciting some monologue he'd memorized. _

"_I hate to say this Paige, but in this line of work, its better if you don't have anyone waiting for you." he sighed, and I thought I saw remorse on his face. _

"_Is it dangerous?" I asked. "You just told me it's an elite unit, and your boss wants someone to be held accountable for their mental health." I added quickly. _

"_It can be, but you wouldn't be a field agent. You'd be in an office or your private quarters." He explained. _

"_I need some time to think about it Phil." I said as we started walking again. _

"_That's an improvement from a few weeks ago." he smiled. "You wouldn't even consider it when I first came to see you." _

_We had reached my office and I pulled my keys out of my pocket and unlocked the door. I didn't invite him to follow me and he stood outside the door. _

"_I'll call you later Phil. I think I may have some more questions." I said and he nodded and walked away._

I shook away the memory. I had called him later and we had a drink. I asked him what it was like to leave everything he knew behind, and he assured me that it was easy if you didn't leave anything behind. I made my decision that night and 3 days later I was on the Helicarrier getting briefed and meeting with each Avenger, with the exception of Thor, for the first time.

My water had gone cold so I climbed out and wrapped myself in a towel. I drained the water in the tub and dried off. I took a look at my reflection in the mirror and didn't see the broken woman I had been when I first came in here.

I changed into my clean clothes and moved to the bathroom door. I took a few deep breaths; I didn't know what to expect when I faced Steve again. I turned the handle and stepped out, flipping the light switch as I went. I looked around and was surprised that I didn't see Steve. I went to the mini fridge and pulled out a small bottle of white wine. I thought about pouring it into a glass, but changed my mind. As I unscrewed the cap, I noticed Steve pacing on the terrace with his phone pressed to his ear.

I went to the doors and slipped outside unnoticed. I stood silently sipping my wine watching as he paced; he hadn't noticed me yet.

"Dr. Banner, please return my phone call as soon as possible." He said through gritted teeth. He ended the call and exhaled loudly.

"Rough night Cap?" I teased to alert him of my presence. He turned to look at me and I smiled. It felt forced and weak, but I wanted him to understand that I was alright; even if I had been shaken up before.

"Doctor, how are you feeling?" He asked as he pulled a chair out from the wrought iron table.

He gestured to the chair and I sat, gratefully. I was still feeling wiped out from all the adrenaline that had coursed through me earlier. He sat in the chair opposite me and rested his elbows on the table and just...stared at me. It was unnerving; I felt like I didn't know what to do with my hands, so I just kept holding onto my wine.

"I'm fine Steve." I huffed out. I realized that as much as I didn't want to recount what had happened tonight, I had to tell Steve. If for no other reason than he had taken on the role of team leader.

"I just don't want you to freak out. Yes, something did happen between Bruce and me, but I'm not hurt or even upset anymore." I huffed and took a drink of my wine.

"I'm worried that you'll make a bigger deal out of this than necessary."

I sighed as Steve looked at me intently. I couldn't figure out why he was looking at me like that.

"Paige, I promise to listen to you." Steve finally said and reached across the table to hold my hand, just as I had held his in our first and only session.

I looked up into Steve's eyes and saw curiosity mixed with something else I couldn't identify. It looked like he was trying to convey some sort of emotion to me, but it looked like his eyes were shining. If we had been in a cartoon, there would have been little sparkles in his eyes.

His thumb was stroking the back of my hand and I suddenly had the idea that he was trying to charm me. I pulled my hand away and sat back in my chair.

"I don't know what you're playing at Cap, but I don't like it." I said crossly. I looked at him and waited for him to argue with me.

"I'm sorry Paige." he chuckled softly as he sat back in his own chair. "I should have known better than to try to flirt with you so you would trust me."

I snorted, "How many times has that worked for you?" I wondered how many times, how many meetings or witnesses he'd tried that on and it worked.

"More than I'd like to admit." He ran a hand through his hair. "You saw right through me though, huh Doc?"

I considered this for a moment and couldn't decide whether it was good that his charm had no effect on me or whether that was a sad notion.

"Do you want to know what happened, Steve?" I asked simply. He nodded and I told him everything that was said in that alley; I spared no detail.

When I was finished I stood up and walked over to the terrace wall and looked out over the city. I didn't want to look at Steve; I couldn't. While I relayed the story to him...he looked worried. I understood he might have some concern for me and my well-being, but I think he was worried about what was happening with Bruce.

I heard the iron chair scrape across the concrete as he stood up. I turned around to lean against the wall as the Captain walked over and stood next to me.

"I need to talk to Bruce." he stated simply. I shook my head and moved to stand in front of him.

"No. This is between Bruce and me." I said with a shake of my head. "We will talk about it when he's ready." I started to move back to the French doors when I felt him grab my arm to stop me. I tried to tug my arm free, but he turned me to look at him.

"Do you understand that he could have killed you?" Steve had a quiet fury in his voice and it felt like his eyes were boring straight into mine.

"But he didn't! He controlled himself!" I shook free of his grasp and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Bruce knows when he's about to lose control and he stopped himself before he hurt me." I let out an exasperated sigh.

"Steve, I wasn't even scared...just confused." I admitted.

"Paige, something like this needs to be brought to the attention of the team. Fury should know about it too." he said and went fishing in his pocket for his phone. As soon as he pulled it out, I grabbed it and flung it over the terrace wall.

"Paige!" Steve hollered at me and looked murderous.

"Captain Rogers; this is my problem! Not yours and not the Avengers'!" I stated as I shoved into his chest. "Do I make myself clear?"

All at once his angry expression turned to one of confusion.

"Why are you protecting him?" he asked me suddenly. I rolled my eyes at the absurdity of his question.

"I'm not protecting anyone. But if you all come charging at him what do you think he's going to do?" I looked up at him indignantly but didn't wait for him to answer.

"He'll run and he will never come back. Bruce has been the man he once was since joining up with this motley crew and you want to ruin that!"

I felt for Bruce, I really did. I didn't like what happened between us tonight and I wasn't excusing it, but I'd be damned if he was going to suffer any more than he already was.

"I think it's time for you to leave Steve." I said as calmly as I could muster. "I have an early morning tomorrow." I turned and walked to the terrace doors and let myself inside, where Steve followed close behind. I walked straight to the door of the suite and waited for him.

He reached the door and grabbed the handle when he turned to look at me.

"You have two weeks to talk to him. If you can't get to the bottom of whatever is going on, then I step in." He informed me.

"Is that an order, Sir?" I asked with a cocked eyebrow. I was showing my defiance. I didn't care if he was the team leader or a _national hero._ I didn't care if he and every other Avenger considered me "one of the team", I was not about to take orders from him.

"It's a request, Paige." He reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose and when he looked at me again his eyes were shining, as if tears were just under the surface.

"I can't explain it, but seeing you hurt...it makes my heart hurt. I don't want to see anything happen to you." he said it so quietly I almost didn't hear him.

"I'll be hurt if you don't let me deal with this myself." I responded evenly. He nodded once and opened the door. When he crossed over the threshold he turned back to look at me and smiled.

"You have to explain to Stark why my phone is lying in pieces on the sidewalk of Park Avenue." he chuckled softly.

"I'll tell him tomorrow morning when I see him. You were helpless to a woman's rage; I think he might understand that." I countered. He nodded again and before he turned to walk away I reached out and put a hand on his arm.

"I'm sorry Steve, but thank you for listening." I said sincerely.

"Sure." was the only answer I got from him before he turned and walked down the hall.

I shut the door and locked it, letting out a huge sigh. I went and sat on the edge of the bed and called to set up a wakeup call for 6am. Since it was almost midnight, I could probably get a good 5 hours if I went to sleep right away. I fished my phone charger out of my briefcase and plugged in my phone.

As I crawled into the bed and got settled under the covers, the only thing I could focus on from this whole ridiculous night was what Steve had said just before he left.

Apparently, his heart hurt when he saw me hurt. Which didn't make much sense to me at first, but as the hours dragged on and I tossed and turned, I thought I had it figured out.

When Steve had first seen me in that alley, I _was_ hurt. Maybe not physically, but I had been crying...my own heart hurt after seeing Bruce in that light. I was sure I had looked broken when Steve found me, but I was still having a hard time wrapping my mind around the fact that it hurt him as well.

Maybe that was something friends dealt with. Maybe opening myself up was only going to lead to problems; I mean I had almost been accosted by The Hulk tonight.

I looked over at the alarm clock and the illuminated numbers telling me it was 2 o'clock. _Jesus H!_

I rolled over one more time and flipped my pillow over to the cool side. I started counting my breaths and mentally slowing my heart rate. I lost count as I floated off into a dreamless sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I'll keep this as short as possible...this chapter is rough. Luckily, I'll make up for it with a CapPOV for the next chapter. If you haven't reviewed...please do! Tell me you hate it, love it, or tolerate it...leave a little something? Again, my love and appreciation to yagalinus0420 for being an awesome beta! **

Dreams are a funny thing. I was not one to remember my dreams vividly or really one to even dream. You had to get REM sleep to dream. I don't think I've slept more than 4 or 5 hours since I was a child. After my parents died when I closed my eyes, all I could see were their faces smiling at me; and while that should have been comforting…it wasn't. Because I knew I would never see them again.

I lived in a group home for 2 years after they died and because I was tormented by some of the older kids, I never slept well. Thinking back on it now, I still couldn't understand that kind of coping mechanism. All of us kids were alone in the world, but yes, let's pick on the girl whose parents died in a fire, as opposed to others that were drug addicts or on prison.

Then I was subjected to dozens of foster homes; where I think the parents there really did have our best interests at heart, but there were always 4 or 5 of us foster kids living there. They never really had the time to give any personal attention.

I never had a lot of close friends at school, choosing instead to focus on my studies so I could move on from this point and give myself the opportunities that I deserved.

I didn't go to my prom or Friday night football games. I had a total of 3 signatures in my senior yearbook: from my Principal, the woman that worked in the attendance office, and my favorite English teacher. My childhood and teen years were rough on me.

I had never felt more alone in my life.

Well, aside from right now.

I woke up and felt very groggy and my head was pounding. I sat up slowly and took in my surroundings and gasped when I realized that I wasn't in my beautiful hotel suite. It took me a moment to gather my thoughts as I stood up and saw that I was in fact being held in a small grey room. There were no windows, but it did have a sturdy looking metal door and what I assumed was a two-way mirror. There seemed to be a small bathroom that didn't have a door, but upon closer inspection I saw that there was a pocket door hidden. There was also a metal chair that was sitting over by the door. I walked to it and found a pair of sweats and a note.

Dr. Smith,

I'm sorry that this is the way things must be, but I assure you that you will be treated with the utmost respect while you are here. We have no intention of hurting you, but we need some answers.

Please cooperate with us and you'll be released as soon as we are satisfied.

There was no signature but it was hand written. As soon as I had finished reading it I started crying. Apparently, while being held here I was going to be respected. I snorted with disgust.

I was being held against my will…that just screamed respect.

I grabbed the sweatpants and gave them a once over, looking for anything that might tell me something about where I was, but they were very nondescript. I pulled them on over my shorts and went to the mirror. I looked at my reflection in it and realized I'd never know for sure what was behind there. The fluorescent lights in the room were incredibly bright. I turned back around and glanced around again. It looked like an interrogation room in some prime time cop drama. I thought about going back to the cot that I woke up on to try and remember anything about how I got here, but my bladder had other ideas.

I walked back to the glass and knocked. I figured someone had to be watching me.

"Hey! Where the hell am I?" I shouted, hoping anyone would hear me.

About 30 seconds later a young woman wearing a lab coat walked through the metal door and it shut behind her with a thud.

"Doctor, my name is Lorraine. I'll be helping to take care of you while you stay with us." she said with a smug smile on her face.

"Where am I? How did I get here?" I asked, as I started to feel myself start to hyperventilate. Lorraine looked at me with large eyes.

"Dr. Smith, if you cooperate, I'll be able to give you some information." She said somewhat hastily.

"Of course, there are some rules I need you to follow to ensure your safety here." She added as I slowly sat on the cot. "As soon as we are finished with you, you'll be able to leave. As long as you follow the rules, you'll leave on your own and not in a hospital bed." She said evenly as I looked at her.

"Why am I here?" I asked again. Lorraine laughed loudly. She walked over to me and tugged on my arm to stand me up.

"Come with me." She said as she led me out of the room.

"You'll walk ahead of me the entire time." She said as she gestured for me to walk into a long corridor.

There were no windows and no doors that seemed to lead anywhere else. I continued walking until I came to dead end. I looked around and noticed a red blinking light.

"There are cameras everywhere Doctor." She said as an invisible door slid open to reveal a room that looked a bit like a conference room. There was a long table on one side of the room that held several different chafing dishes and as I moved closer I smelled the aroma of various foods.

"Please eat Doctor. We'll need you to keep up your strength." Lorraine told me as she went and poured herself a cup of coffee.

I turned back to the table and grabbed a plate and began to lift the lids on the dishes. I saw scrambled eggs, breakfast meats, roasted vegetables and platters of fresh fruit and cheeses next to them. I loaded a plate and walked over to a table and set it down. I was looking around for any other drinks when Lorraine spoke up.

"Water? We also have orange juice, coffee and tea. I would suggest water though…" she trailed off as she looked at me expectantly.

I had eaten, although not really enough of anything. I had loaded my plate, but ended up picking at everything. Lorraine led me to a small locker room area where there was a change of clothes and toiletries. I decided that a shower might just clear my head. I turned on the water and after stripping, I stepped under the stream.

The water finally warmed up and I began washing myself with the nondescript bar of soap. I was wracking my brain trying to remember anything about how I got here. I had spoken to Steve about what happened between Bruce and me in the alley and I knew that Tony Stark was expecting me at his office at 9 this morning.

I felt a small twinge of excitement at that thought. He knew where I was supposed to be and I hoped would be concerned when I didn't show…ever. Steve knew where my hotel was and if he didn't … surely Pepper would be able to do something!

Maybe they left the room ransacked when they took me. If I put up a fight, maybe they would be able to at least put it together that I was taken against my will.

I sighed as I washed my hair. I couldn't remember anything; how they got in or if I tried to fight them. Had I been drugged? Anything was possible at this point, but how could they have done it? I rinsed my hair and turned off the water. I grabbed a towel and began rubbing myself dry before stepping out of the stall.

Trying to drug me at the restaurant left a huge margin for error because they wouldn't know what I would order. And I was pretty sure I would have felt the drugs before I even made it to my hotel. I rummaged through the clean clothes and found a new pair of underwear and pulled them on. I put on my bra and found deodorant. As I finished getting dressed I had an idea. This woman didn't want to hurt me, but she would if she felt she needed to. I needed to find out why I was here and what they wanted with me. It was obvious that whoever had captured me thought I had something or knew something.

I stepped out of the bathroom and stood awkwardly in the empty space. Lorraine looked up at me and smiled.

"Do you feel better then?" Lorraine asked as I stepped back into the main part of the locker room.

I nodded slightly as I continued to dry my hair with a towel.

"There's a hamper for your dirty clothes and towels." She told me and pointed to a white plastic bin. I put my dirty clothes in and deposited the towel.

"Let's get you back to your room; I'm sure you have plenty of questions." She smirked at me.

Of course I have questions…

Again, I walked in front of her and felt a little like I was leading a two person parade. We made it back to the same room I had woken up in and Lorraine took up residence in the metal chair I had noticed earlier. I sighed and dropped down on the cot.

I stared at her for what seemed like hours. I had already asked her my questions before she took me to eat and shower. Right now, I wanted to listen.

"So, you really have no idea why you're here?" she asked me finally. I sighed and shook my head. I desperately wanted a notepad and something to write with; keeping track of everything and anything I learned could only work to my advantage later.

"Just tell me why I'm here, please?" I wanted to beg and scream, but keeping my emotions in check would keep me sane and informed for the time being.

"Paige, when you were a child your parents died. You were only 6, but we saw something in you…something that had the potential to be amazing." She started slowly.

"Do you remember anything about your life before your parents died?" Lorraine asked as I tried not to hyperventilate since my parents were mentioned.

"I don't remember much of my life before the fire. The therapist I saw when I was a teenager believed that the trauma of losing my parents essentially erased my memories of them. Something akin to selective amnesia." I explained as she nodded slightly in front of me.

"Well, that's truly a shame." She stood up and went to move to the door.

"Wait!" I jumped up off the cot and ran to stand in front of the door.

"You said you would give me answers." I crossed my arms over my chest.

Lorraine quirked an eyebrow at me and sighed heavily. She went to sit back down in the metal chair.

"Paige...from a very early age, your parents noticed that you were...different." She explained slowly; letting that tiny bit of information set in.

"Different how?" I asked skeptically. "And what the hell do my parents have to do with me being here?"

"Have you ever had an IQ test?" Lorraine asked instead of giving me any answers.

"Not that I'm aware of." I answered slowly.

"You had one when you were 4 years old." She told me as I stared blankly back at her.

"Your parents had noticed that your cognition was astounding." Lorraine began, she stood and started pacing.

"Your parents had expressed to your pediatrician that you seemed to possess the ability to make logical thoughts around 2 years old. You had an exceptionally clear concept of time and were speaking in full sentences." She told me as I struggled to understand what she was telling me.

"Your IQ was tested and your parents were on the verge of allowing for you to be put into a special program where your high intelligence would be nurtured." Lorraine said as she sat down.

"Our organization is continually on the lookout for exceptional young minds. We don't take students away from family and we encourage them to have friends outside of our program; we feel that socialization is extremely important." Lorraine sighed.

"One of the most important things we look for however, is compassion." Lorraine said with a wry smile.

"High intelligence is obviously a key element we look for and expect, but compassion for your fellow man...that's something that is inherent in people...it can't be duplicated." She looked at me as if she was expecting me to respond.

"Why were you testing us? What was the purpose?" I asked not really wanting to hear the answer.

"We were trying to replicate the success of Dr. Erskine's original serum. We found adults willing to undergo the experimentation process, but we found that when faced with the idea of their death and that of their fellow soldier...well, they would choose themselves; even if that other person would be a better benefit to the world." She explained to me.

"We decided that we would train children from early ages to adapt, with the help of the serum. They were trained in combat and languages, but we also encouraged them to have a sense of comradery and willingness to lay down their life for someone else." She looked at me and sat down.

"So, you were trying to create an army? Out of children?" I asked incredulously. "For what purpose?"

"Not an army of children, but children that would grow into exceptional people, willing to fight for this country, but with the intelligence to defend the United States without excessive force." She said pridefully.

"But other countries, nations that are considered our enemies will use excessive force to gain the upper hand." I spat out. This wasn't making any sense to me at all.

"Is this organization responsible for my parent's deaths?" I asked quietly. I always wondered if someone other than a shitty electrician was behind the fire that killed my parents.

Lorraine looked at me and smiled sadly as she shook her head.

"No. We were as equally surprised and shocked when that tragedy occurred." She paused and I looked up to her to see if I could read her expression.

Lorraine had a blank look on her face and her eyes were vacant.

"After that, you were moved into foster care in the state of Missouri and even with all our resources, we decided that you had had enough upheaval in your life that it was unnecessary to continue with our program." She said as she blinked and looked over at me.

"We initially found you 3 years ago when you were still working with the Kansas City Police Department, but before we could approach you, you had disappeared completely." She told me as I thought back to my life 3 years ago.

I met Phil 2 ½ years ago…and after only about 6 weeks of talking to him I had decided to join SHIELD.

"We never had the opportunity to reach out to you before you went to work for SHIELD. We lost track of you, but you popped back up on our radar 9 months ago." She looked at me for confirmation, and it took me a moment to realize what she meant.

"I was at a press conference." I said slowly as she nodded. "There was public outrage about the damage done in New York and people were questioning whether The Avengers were fit to protect and serve this nation."

I remembered the panel there. I had stood next to the director of Homeland Security. I never said a word; but I was there to alleviate concerns. I knew that every news outlet had covered the press conference…and my name and credentials would have been displayed.

"6 months ago we finally had the opportunity to restart the experiment. We found a vulnerable time when you had your guard down and we injected you with another round. We've developed a brand new version of the Super Serum; I'm sure you're familiar with that?" Lorraine asked as I stared at her with my mouth gaping.

"Luckily for you, we've had years to perfect the serum. You will be pushed further physically than you ever have before." She continued as she sat back down.

"You were one of the original test subjects. At age 5 you received the preliminary shot. Now we train you to work harder, be stronger. You'll take risks...and survive. No more aging. No pain no hurt..." She trailed off and looked at me with this wistful expression that made me wonder if she wanted to be in my shoes.

"Did you ever think that after all these years that maybe I could make up my own mind about this? You kidnapped me!" I could feel my blood start to boil.

"You didn't get to me 25 years ago and decided to track me down so you could finish your experiments?!" I flung myself off the cot and at the other woman.

My hands tightened around Lorraine's neck and I saw her face turning red. She was clawing at my arms and kicking her legs, trying to do anything to get me to loosen my grip on her.

Suddenly I felt myself being pulled off her by two men. I struggled against them while they hoisted my feet off the ground. I kicked and twisted as Lorraine slowly picked herself up off the floor. I saw my handprints in bright red around her neck and I was immediately disgusted with myself.

I began to sob quietly as the two men sat me down on the cot. I vaguely heard Lorraine speak to them before I heard the heavy door shut again.

"Paige, that kind of behavior will not be permitted." She choked out with a raspy voice.

"Yes, we are going to run some tests on you...but the tests will be done to gauge the effectiveness of the experiment." Lorraine said as she moved herself to the door.

"The actual experiment took place just before your parents died." She added with a smile as she walked out the door.

I sobbed as the effect of her words hit me.

My parents had agreed to some kind of testing.

I had been taken to complete the experiment.

Over the next few weeks, I learned more about the people that had taken me. I was put through numerous tests of endurance. I was put on a strict strength training regimen that brought me up to optimal physical attributes.

The more I spoke to Lorraine, the more I came to realize that everything she told me was true.

I saw all the original paperwork that my parents had signed. There were even videotapes of the first few sessions I was a part of.

After 6 months...I gave up hope of being found and rescued.

I was enjoying how I felt; how strong and secure I was. I was learning so many different languages and about so many cultures. It was overwhelming at times, but I could see where it would be worth it.

I had wondered why I had grown up if I had been given the serum at such a young age. The way Lorraine explained it, I felt foolish for not figuring it out on my own.

The children were all given a low dose of the serum...something to encourage our metabolisms to speed up and help our cognitive abilities to increase. We were all given the chance to grow, but because I had been left out of the full experiment process; my body had actually matured slightly more than was ever intended.

I was relishing in the fact that in 6 more months, my training would be complete and I would be leaving. I had already decided that I wasn't going back to SHIELD. Director Fury had to have known about this and he hid it from me. He hid my potential to do what? Shrink a bunch of arrogant "superheroes"?

I was going to lead my life as I would have before SHIELD. Maybe I would open my practice again, and when I was called upon I would do my duty and serve my country. More successful test subjects like me could eradicate the need for organized military. More men and women could stay at home with their families and not have to put themselves in harm's way.

I would do it for them.

The 10 month mark brought me to my final testing. I had CAT scans and MRI's. I was put through more intense endurance testing and was deemed to be a peak physical performance. This was the last test and I had been preparing for it since I accepted what my fate really was.

I had to subject my body to the vita-rays...and hope that I was destined to be more than I had been before.

Lorraine came to collect me for the exposure.

"Paige, are you ready?" She asked me as she entered the room.

I nodded and walked ahead of her into the corridor.

"What happens if it fails?" I asked for probably the hundredth time. Lorraine stopped me and turned me to look at her.

"Paige, it will work because you are the ideal specimen." She had told me this many times before.

I had long since stopped wincing at the term 'specimen'.

"But, if for whatever reason your body rejects the vita-rays, then we will care for you as long as you're alive. The ramifications can be ghastly...the physical is worse." She looked away for a moment and I knew this was difficult for her also. We had become friends since I had been here.

"Paige, you'll be well enough in your mind that if you choose to ask us to end you...we will have no choice but to honor your wishes." She sighed and waited for me to respond.

"I understand." I took a deep breath and exhaled. "I'm ready; let's do this!"

We entered a large medical room and I saw a gurney situated in the middle of the room. The staff inside directed me to the gurney and as soon as I laid down they strapped me to the table.

I felt the last injection enter my body through the needle and watched as calmly as I could as everyone left the room.

Lead doors closed and I heard someone's voice through an overhead speaker.

"Paige, we'll begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, and 1."

That's when the room went pitch black.

- 1 Year Later-

I had to get back to my apartment to change out of my work clothes before I had my therapy appointment. I checked my watch again as I made my way down the sidewalk. I reached my apartment about 10 minutes later and noticed that I had just enough time to take a quick shower before I needed to leave. I took off my uniform and threw it in my hamper. Luckily I didn't have any other appointments today, so I could do laundry as soon as I got home.

I sighed as I stepped into the shower. I was tired and my feet hurt. I worked a double shift at the diner I had worked at for the last couple of months. I showered quickly and stepped out to get dressed. I pulled on a pair of loose fitting jeans and a simple black t-shirt. I went to my dresser to pull out some socks when I noticed my pants seemed to be sliding down my hips more than I was used to. I grabbed my socks and found my belt.

My reflection caught my eye in the full length mirror that hung off of my closet door. I lifted my shirt slightly and smiled when I saw the defined abs that were underneath. After I recovered from my accident I realized that working out and maintaining my physique was apparently something that was important to me before.

When I awoke that day in the hospital and the subsequent months I spent in recovery had given me the motivation to speed my recovery along. The results were amazing. I was running several miles every morning and I had just saved enough money to be able to afford a gym membership.

I slipped the belt through the loops and pulled my socks on and went to find my shoes. Once I located them I slipped them on and grabbed my purse.

I looked around my small apartment and sighed. After I had come out of the coma, I found out that the apartment I had before the accident had been rented and my belongings had actually been sold to try to make up the back rent.

That was all in the past now. I went and pulled my phone off the charger and wasn't surprised to find that I had no missed calls or texts. I slipped it into my pocket and walked out the door. I made my way quickly to my therapist's office and checked in with the receptionist. I sat and waited patiently, idly flipping through an old magazine.

Finally the therapist came out into the waiting room and invited me into his office. I took my usual seat on a beautiful chaise lounge. It was brown leather and had obviously seen enough patients to make it soft and comfortable. I assumed my general position; sitting Indian style and resting against the back.

I equally adored and loathed my therapist. He was obviously smart and surprisingly funny. I knew it was his job to help me dig deep and finally admit the things that were holding me back in my life...but there were so many things I couldn't explain; so many answers I didn't have because I could barely remember anything from before the accident.

It seemed like sometimes he forgot that and expected me to pull the information out of my ass.

"Well, Nicole." Dr. Barnes started as he took a seat across from me. "Last time we spoke about you wanting to improve your quality of life; not just your physical health but also your mental and emotional." He stated in his melodic British accent.

"What have you done to start that?" He promptly shut up. It was the same way every session. He would start with a prompt and I would talk...sometimes for the entire hour with no questions from him and sometimes he would have to drag things out of me.

"Um, well I joined a gym. So, even though I'm still running in the morning, now I can add to my workout. So that knocks out the physical side." I said with a shrug.

"I'm not so worried about my staying in shape. It seems to have come fairly easily since the accident, even if I don't know how I did before that." I added quickly.

"What about your mental and emotional aspects of your life?" Dr. Barnes prompted. I shrugged again. I wasn't sure what to say.

"I looked into the local community college, but I'm not really sure. From everything that I've found about my life before the accident, I didn't go to college and I just...I just feel like maybe my age and the fact that I was in a coma for 6 months might affect my learning in a negative way." I finally spat out.

It felt good to actually say it out loud. I know the old adage is that no one is ever too young to educate themselves, but I also had limited brain function for a couple months and then my body refused to wake up.

"Nicole, you're doctors have run their tests. There is no lasting damage to your brain." Dr. Barnes spoke softly and precisely.

"What is your real fear?"

I averted his eyes; this is where I knew I would start to feel uncomfortable.

"What if I start going to school and then my memory comes back and I realize that I'm doing something I have no interest in?" I sighed as I stood to pace the room.

"What happens if I got to school and nothing makes sense? What if I can't keep up?" I plopped back down on the chaise lounge and reclined against the high arm.

"Nicole, for the most part, those are all things that people are concerned about when they consider going back to school." He said calmly.

"You know very well that your memory has the potential to return at any point in time. We luckily were able to track down some information on you based on dental records, so we know a little about yourself." Dr. Barnes poured himself a glass of water and took a small sip.

"This is the time in your life when you can start fresh. You can discover what interests you, what things you would like to learn more about."

I nodded, "But at what cost do I get to start fresh?" I sat up and stared at the older man. "I hoped and prayed that I had a family that would find me or a husband. But no one ever came forward. There was no missing persons report...it was like I was invisible before. I lost so much and nothing at all just to have this opportunity to start over."

He remained silent for a few moments while I collected myself. I don't know if it was a good thing or not, but I had never cried in this office.

"The fact that there was no emotional support in the form of friends or family when you were recovering from your accident explains your desire to improve your emotional life as well."

"Nicole, how are you looking to improve your emotional life?" Dr. Barnes asked me as I stared at my favorite spot on the wall behind his desk.

The wallpaper was beige with a small brown swirl pattern and there was one spot where the swirls from two strips didn't meet up just right.

"I'd like to meet someone; go out on dates. I'm friendly with some of my coworkers, but I don't do anything except work. I want to hang out with people." I answered finally.

Again, I was faced with silence and I hated it. There were times that I just wanted him to give me the key to unlocking all the right answers for my life and other times when I just wanted to quit seeing him altogether.

"Alright Nicole, you said you joined a gym. I want you to take the opportunities that come up when you meet new people. Enjoy conversations with them and try to create a familiarity with them." Dr. Barnes explained.

"Nicole, you are a smart young woman. Let yourself experience new things and people. Meeting new people and making friends is a fantastic journey. The next thing you know those friends will be trying to set you up with their brother's or friend's, and you'll have the opportunity to date."

I nodded; I knew what he was trying to tell me. But I was hesitating because...I knew who I wanted in my life.

Well, not specifically, but I had an idea. Tall with blond hair and blue eyes.

Sounds typically what men look for in a woman.

I didn't know if I had a type before my accident, but I certainly did now.

"Nicole, why don't we talk about your dreams, hmm? Have you had any new ones?" Dr. Barnes asked me.

I sighed, "A few. It seems like they're all the same." I admitted. "Every time I see myself in a small room that I can't get out of. Then it flashes to me strapped to a table and people staring at me from behind a large window."

"And has the ending continued to change?" he asked quietly. "Yes...most of the time I get rescued and wake up just as that guy Captain America rescues me. But I've seen the big green one, umm, The Hulk. And just the other night it was Tony Stark." I answered.

"Nicole, it isn't uncommon for coma patients to have strange dreams after they recover. I think the small room is really your mind and what you're seeing in the dream is what your body experienced during the coma." Dr. Barnes explained for about the millionth time.

"You can't escape the room and that represents your mind not being able to control your body and being strapped to the table would be you lying prone in a hospital bed."

"But what about being rescued by members of...what did you call them again?" I asked flustered.

"I believe they're called The Avengers." He sighed and took another sip of his water. "Nicole, your subconscious cannot cope with the idea that it wasn't controlling your body. You learn of these things, like superheroes, and your mind grasps onto the idea. Suddenly you are being rescued instead of just awakening."

"I guess I understand that part." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "But there is one thing that I don't understand."

"What is that Nicole?" Dr. Barnes asked me.

"No matter who it is that finally rescues me...when they do...they always call me Paige." I sighed as I pushed some hair behind my ears.

"Perhaps you had a nurse with that name that took care of you while you were in the coma." Dr. Barnes supplied.

I shook my head, "No I wrote a personal note to all the nurses and doctors that worked in that unit in the hospital. I requested every name so I could thank them. No one was named Paige."

"How do you feel in the dream when you hear that?" he asked me as he slipped his glasses off his face.

"I get a sense of familiarity. Like I've heard them call me that before." I smiled weakly at the man sitting across from me.

"Nicole, all the information from your dental records led you to a birth certificate, a social security card, even your high school transcripts. Nicole Smith is your name." Dr. Barnes concluded.

20 minutes later and I was walking out of the elevator and out onto the street. I glanced around me briefly and decided to find a place to get something to eat.

Dr. Barnes was right. I had been lucky enough to find so many of my personal records; there was no question that I was Nicole Smith. I was born in Bozeman, Montana. My parents had died when I was in high school and I left a few years after that.

Then a year ago I was in a horrible car accident that put me into the hospital in a coma. I was lucky enough to wake up and have no apparent brain damage.

I was lucky.

I saw a little cafe that I had visited before and was checking my bag for my current book while moving toward the cafe door.

I bumped into someone and my bag slipped out of my grasp.

"Oh, for the love of all things that are holy!" I exclaimed as I bent to pick up my bag and the few items that had fallen out when I heard a voice.

It was soft and masculine, but had a hint of trepidation and fear laced with it.

"Paige? Paige is that really you?" he asked me.

_Paige…there was that name again…_

I looked up to correct him but was taken aback by his beautiful blue eyes. They were a soft, pale blue but they looked concerned and were searching my own. His blond hair was brushed and was set into a simple, respectable all-American boy next door look.

Suddenly his arms were around me and he was hugging me.

"Paige! I can't believe it's you!" He cried as he sat me down. I took a much closer look at him and it dawned on me...

"Are you Captain America?" I managed to squeak out before the darkness of fainting took over.


	6. Chapter 6

**Ok, where do I even start? Of course, I own nothing...I'm not that cool. Secondly...this is totally unbeta'd...I felt like I had made you wait too long as it was, so my lovely yagalinus0420 hasn't even seen this finished product yet. Sorry. Thirdly...don't hate...but it's a short chapter. The next chapter will most likely be Cap POV also...but it may be split between him and Paige. I got the most responses from the last chapter! Thank you so much! I promise that more questions will be answered. For those of you, and there are SO many, asking about Phil...I can't say whether or not he'll be back...he hasn't told me anything yet! As for anything else...I had a lovely visit with my sissy in law!  
**

**Cap POV**

The last year had been hard on me...hard on all of us. The Avengers had lost one of their own; and while Dr. Paige Smith wasn't considered a "hero", she was a member of our team.

I set down my newspaper, unable to continue the crossword puzzle I had worked on for the better part of an hour.

Like often, my thoughts drifted back to Paige.

She was so smart and funny if you gave her the chance. She had been put through the proverbial ringer and came out the other side much better.

There we were one night having dinner with Banner, Natasha, and Clint...and the next thing I know she's gone. If she hadn't worked for SHIELD, I would have thought that maybe she didn't really exist.

As long as I live I will never forget that night and the way I felt. I had surprised Paige in the alleyway behind some forgettable Mexican restaurant after she had an encounter with Bruce Banner...and The Hulk.

She had been understandably shaken up after the incident. When she ran off to her hotel and I went to speak to her there, I saw a woman who had let her guard down. She was exposed and raw.

I wanted to hug and comfort her. I had flirted with her, trying to make her understand that I cared. Instead, she saw it as a ruse to get her to talk.

How could I make her understand that my attraction was more than skin deep? When I had my first and only session with Paige, she had made me question myself.

She had me pegged before I had even sat down in her office.

I had kept my distance to try to reign in my feelings for her. The attraction was so immediate and intense I didn't know how to cope with it.

It was like seeing Peggy again...but she wasn't Peggy, and I wasn't the same man I have been 70 years ago.

I fished my wallet out of my pocket and placed a few bills on the table. I gathered my paper and threw my jacket on and made my way to the door.

I had just stepped through it when a woman bumped into me and dropped her purse.

I was about to apologize and help her with her belongings when I heard her voice...a voice I was sure I would never hear again.

"Oh, for the love of all things that are holy!" She exclaimed as she bent to pick up her bag.

I could never mistake that voice that was slightly throaty, and the way she said that phrase.

I had heard it the last day I saw her.

The next thing I knew I was hugging her and crying.

"Paige! I can't believe it's you!" I cried as I set her down. She looked up at me strangely.

Her hazel eyes were the same but her hair was lighter and it looked bottled. The cut was impossibly short but I found that it suited her beautifully.

When her eyes went wide with realization at who I was...I didn't see the joy of recognition...I saw disbelief.

"Are you Captain America?" She managed to squeak out before she fainted in my arms.

I guess I was lucky that there weren't many people out on the street at this time of day. A little too early for people to be off work, and seeing as this wasn't a particularly busy street, I knew I had a little time.

I checked for her pulse and found it steady and strong. I brushed the wisp of bangs away from her forehead and looked at her face. She looked so beautiful, even in this life changing situation.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called the one person that could help me right away.

"Stark, I've got a girl here that you've got to see to believe!" I exclaimed when he answered the call.

"_Look Cap, years ago that would have gotten my attention but seeing as I'm a taken man...deal with the floozy on your own." he said sarcastically. "Oh, and good for you by the way."_

"Tony, you don't understand." I breathed out. "I was sitting the cafe working on my crossword, and I was thinking about her...well, I guess I'm always thinking about her and then BAM, I walk out the door and run right into her."

My hands were shaking as I looked down on her again. She passed out; oblivious to the joy and turmoil I was feeling.

"_STEVE!" _Tony bellowed at me through the phone. _"You aren't making any sense. Who did you find?"_

"She's here Tony; I can't even believe this..." I sighed.

"Tony...it's Paige." I breathed out. I waited for a response...

"_Where are you?" he asked hurriedly. _

"At the corner of Grove Street and Bedford." I said as I looked around me again.

"There's no one out here Tony. I feel like someone is watching me though."

"_I'm on my way Steve. Is she ok?" Tony asked and I could swear I heard his propulsors in the background._

"She fainted when she saw me. I mean, we ran into each other and when she realized it was me...I caught her though." I stuttered. "She didn't hit her head or anything."

Suddenly I saw Tony, suit and all. He flipped the faceplate off and glanced down at the woman lying in my arms.

"Jesus Christ!" I hollered. He turned and walked a few steps away and then hurried back to me.

I had picked her up and was holding her in my arms.

"Are you sure that's her, Rogers?" He asked me with a wild look to his eyes.

I squared my eyes directly on his.

"It's her." I answered affirmatively.

He nodded once and replaced the faceplate.

"JARVIS, send Happy to my location immediately." He ordered his computer.

"_Sir, Mister Hogan is waiting for Ms. Potts. She should be leaving momentarily. I'll be happy to send them both over as soon-"_

"I'll call Pepper. Get Happy here now!" he roared.

"_Yes sir."_

"How did you find her?" Tony asked me. I looked at him in shock.

"I didn't." I started. "I was in the cafe and Tony, I was thinking about her when I got up to leave and..."

At that moment Happy raced up to the curb in Tony's Rolls Royce. I moved steadily to the back seat and laid her down. I climbed into the front and Tony told Happy to go back to Stark Tower.

"I've going to get Pepper. Do not call anyone, do you understand me?" Tony asked me hastily, and I nodded my head in acknowledgment.

Happy took off down the street as Tony shot off into the sky; and I sat in the front seat of a luxury car with a miracle in the back.

~*~*~*~*~*~*12 Months Prior~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"What do you mean she never showed up?" I asked Pepper as tried calling Paige's cell number again. She had done it at least 7 times since I had shown up about 20 minutes ago.

"Well old timer," Tony started with a smirk. "Sometimes people don't come to their appointment, that's usually when we say she didn't show up." He rolled his eyes at me and walked to the sidebar and poured himself another drink.

I knew he was nervous; even someone like the infallible Tony Stark could be shaken. Paige had so much as disappeared without a trace. He had JARVIS trying to locate a GPS signal from her phone, but there was no luck yet.

Pepper told me when I first came into the apartment that she had even called the hotel, and apparently Paige had checked out already. A quick scan of the Helicarrier's security information told us that she hadn't gone back to the ship.

We couldn't find her and I had a knot in my stomach and a lead weight on my shoulders.

I was essentially that last person to see Paige between last night and now.

I looked back to Pepper who shook her head slowly at me. I dropped my head and felt the fear welling inside of me. I swallowed it down and looked back up to Tony and Pepper.

"Steve, did she say anything to you last night? Tony says you were with her late..." Pepper asked and I immediately felt sorry for not bringing it up.

"Well, the reason I went to see her at the hotel was because of something that happened with Dr. Banner." I said seriously.

I relayed everything, just as Paige had told it to me. When I finished I locked eyes with Tony.

"Bruce knows something Tony. I know he does." I said vehemently. Tony set his glass of bourbon down as gently as he started to approach me.

"Steve, look I get that you want to defend your girl's honor or whatever." He started quietly.

"She's not my girl, Stark! But the big guy almost burst out and attacked her in an alleyway! Don't you think it's more than a coincidence?" I shouted directly in his face.

"Calm down lover boy. Aren't the two doctors friends or something?" he asked neither Pepper nor me in particular.

"She said that they usually saw each other at least once a day. They normally ate lunch together." Pepper offered up. She shrugged at me and I looked back to Tony.

"Don't you think we should consider every possibility at this point?" I asked him. Something felt wrong about this; he had to feel it too.

"I think...as much as I can hardly stand the man, that we should call Fury." He said as he grabbed his glass and moved back to the bar.

"He'll know how to handle this."

"Fine, I'm going to see him now." I said as I grabbed my jacket and slipped my arms into the sleeves.

"I'll go with you." Tony said as he kissed Pepper on the cheek. "You seem a little "_emotionally invested_"." He said using his fingers to make air quotes.

"Look Stark, how would you feel if it were Pepper?" I asked and gasped as soon as the words left my mouth.

"She's not Pepper though, is she?" Tony countered. "I would be devastated and scared, but I sure as hell wouldn't jump to conclusions!"

I looked to Pepper and she crossed the room and put a hand on my shoulder.

"Yes you would and you have." She said offhandedly to Tony. "I care about her too Steve. I'm sure she's fine and we'll find her in no time." She offered to me. I nodded curtly.

We had gone to Fury and he had set up a search that probably rivaled the one Howard Stark had done for me.

Months went by with no information on where she could be or who was responsible for her disappearance. At first the thought was that she was taken as part of a bigger scheme to get to one of us; but she was never used as leverage, nor was she offered up for negotiations.

Natasha and Clint took Paige's disappearance extremely hard. Natasha had seen in Paige someone that could be her friend. In a world where we wonder so often if people are trying to befriend us for our powers or our connections and not for who we really were.

Clint had seen a confidant...someone who would understand his desire to keep to himself. He had always stayed in the shadows, literally and figuratively, but after the incident with Loki, Clint had become even more withdrawn.

When he started seeing Paige for his sessions, he wasn't even talking to Natasha very much. He told me that Paige had told him that even when we betray our friends, if they truly care for us their support and friendship will always be there. And while she never told him that she also had trouble making and keeping friends, Clint started to come around. It was no surprise that he and Natasha were romantically involved, but he considered me and the others as friends; and it's true enough to say that we felt the same way.

Stark told me that Pepper cried often for the loss of Paige. The two women had apparently reached an understanding about being friends just before Paige's disappearance. Pepper thought of Paige as like a younger sister, and only wanted for her to be happy. She had seen right through her and knew that was what Paige needed.

As for Stark...he enjoyed riling Paige up. He said that she was a great debater and he really loved how fired up she would get after he said something completely asinine.

All these perspectives on Paige after all those months of searching for her left me realizing just how much I had missed her.

What everyone else felt for Paige, I felt too. But my perspective and feelings for her were becoming unbearable.

I agreed with everyone else's opinions of her, but I knew she was so much more.

How could I have been so blind as to let myself always keep my distance?

When Director Fury called me into this office 10 months after Paige's disappearance was the last thing I wanted to do at that point.

We had just come back from a mission and I was exhausted. All I really wanted was a shower, maybe a couple hours worth of sleep...and then to check to see if there was any new intel on Paige.

"Captain, I trust everything went as planned in Prague." He stated while I stood at attention.

"Yes sir. The situation is completely under control." I answered affirmatively.

Fury nodded as he took a seat behind his desk and gestured for me to sit across from him.

"Cap, I know how hard you've been working and I want you to know that it hasn't gone unnoticed." He said, while looking over at his huge windows.

"Thank you Sir. But I couldn't do all this without the others-" I start to answer when Fury raises a hand to cut me off.

"I'm talking about your work to track down our good Doctor Smith." Fury says with a sly smile. "Your dedication is unparalleled; and I know that your professionalism will agree with what I have to say."

He shifted his gaze towards me, and I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand at attention.

"It's been 10 months Cap; I think it's time to call off the search." Fury tells me with a finality that was haunting.

"Sir, with all due respect, she could turn up at any moment." I explain; my voice laden with frustration.

"Captain, with all due respect the search for Dr. Paige Smith is not sanctioned by SHIELD any longer. Your new orders are to cease and desist." Fury challenged.

"My recommendation is for you to find a way to respectfully say your goodbyes to Dr. Smith, and then move one." He told me as he stood and moved towards the windows that were currently overlooking the Pacific Ocean.

I was shocked into silence. The idea of giving up was not in my nature. Although, this wasn't the first time the idea had been presented to me.

After the first six weeks of her disappearance Banner made the same suggestion…and he kept throwing it out there every chance he got. I was initially suspicious of his thoughts until Natasha said she thought maybe we should stop also.

It was the conversation with Pepper a month ago that left me feeling confused as to what course of action to take.

Pepper wondered if maybe Paige just didn't _want _to be found. That perhaps for some reason she had dropped off the face of the Earth for reasons unknown to any of us.

Could that be why we hadn't found anything of her?

"What do you want me to do? Have a funeral for her?" I snapped.

"No one is declaring Paige Smith dead, Captain." Fury replied, without so much as looking at me.

"We had more time to grieve for Agent Coulson." I shot back at the director.

He finally turned and looked at me.

"Agent Coulson's body was found." He said, sharply. "You give me a body; you can take all the time you want."

I was furious; how dare he say something like that about Paige? Especially after spouting off about how she was a part of our team.

I moved to the door to leave without being dismissed.

"You wanted Paige and me to cross paths? To what end?" I asked over my shoulder.

"So you could help each other heal." Fury said on a sigh.

"Who's going to help me heal now?" I asked.

I left the office before I could hear his reply.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I don't own anything! Sorry I was absent for so long...my SIL had come to visit and Cap stopped speaking to me! Jerk! Oh well...again, many loves and thanks to yagalinus0420...who is leaving me for vacation! *sniffs* kisses! So...how about some reviews? If it sucks, at least tell me! :)**

**Cap POV**

After leaving Fury's office I found myself pacing in my private quarters. I was clenching my fists repeatedly and trying desperately to calm down. I was taking deep breaths, but nothing was working.

I stopped pacing and looked to my desk where a simple wooden picture frame sat. I had acquired a security photo of Paige from the day we spoke on the deck of the Helicarrier.

We were standing next to each other, and I knew we had been discussing her taking a ride with me on my bike to Stark Tower.

Her chestnut hair was in a low ponytail and a slight smile was playing on her lips. I sighed as I picked the frame up and looked at the face that I had memorized well before it disappeared from my life.

My thoughts drifted to Peggy. I saw so many similarities between these two incredible women. So determined and headstrong; but vulnerable in their own ways. Beautiful and brilliant.

I had learned through records that there had never been any type of memorial for me all those years ago. Peggy and the guys in my squad never had closure.

I would have wanted people to have the chance to say goodbye if the situation had been reversed. I wondered if Paige would have felt the same way.

A part of me wanted to believe that she would understand that we all needed closure...that I needed closure.

Two weeks later at the makeshift memorial service, that's what I kept telling myself.

Pepper had helped out with every detail and everyone who was there told me how nice and simple things were.

But I honestly couldn't tell you anything about that day.

I was so wrapped up in my own emotions and grief.

I remember thinking how it was 10 short months ago that Paige and I had started to form some sort of friendship. How I was hoping that that small seed of friendship would bloom into the love, desire, companionship.

And how selfish was I to think that even if she could see me in that light that she would want to be with me. A man who very possibly would never age or die. A man who may not be able to have a family. Yet, that's all I wanted...and with Paige.

I never even knew how or when I came to this realization, but the only thing I wanted for my personal life, was a life with her.

"Steve, Dr. Foster and Thor are getting ready to leave." Pepper told me, breaking me out of my introspection.

I nodded as the God of Thunder and the kind Dr. Foster approached me.

I tried to put on my best smile as the couple approached me.

"Captain" Thor started as he clapped a hand on my shoulder. "In my world we do not honor lives without a body of-"

I was staring at him incredulously. Surely someone would have explained this to him.

"I think what Thor means is that it was a lovely service Captain Rogers; and I'm sure he's grateful for the cultural education." Dr. Foster cut in.

"Thank you Doctor. I'm very touched that you could be here." I said sincerely. She nodded at me.

"Captain, I have spoken to my brother many a time at length." Thor started, "I believe we may have a problem."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Loki seemed truly surprised to hear about the good doctor, but he appears to know nothing." He stated simply.

"What do you mean 'appears' to know nothing?" I all but growled at him.

"I am sure that he is not aware that he has any information on the disappearance. It is as if his brain is clouded." Thor explained to me quietly.

"I am sorry I cannot be of more help my Captain."

I nodded slowly, "I understand Thor. I appreciate you doing what you can."

He smiled and walked away to speak with Tony and Pepper, while Jane lingered near me.

"What happens now?" I asked quietly.

"What do you mean Captain?" She asked as she looked up to me.

"He escorts you back to Montana and then what?" I looked down at her and she smiled sadly.

"Then I go back to work." She responded quietly. "We might get lucky and have a few days together."

She smiled as we looked to the god that held her heart.

"But then he leaves you." I said solemnly.

"And I have to wait. But I don't ever give up hope that he'll come back to me." She answered as she looked up at me again.

"Steve, I know this is difficult, but if you really believe that Dr. Smith is out there somewhere, you can never give up hope." Her voice thick with conviction.

"You can hold onto hope forever if you need to." She added quickly as Thor began to walk back towards us.

"My forever is an eternity." I murmured sadly after they had said their quiet goodbyes as I headed to the door.

Before I could leave I saw someone making their way towards me, and I couldn't help but feel like he didn't belong there.

"Steve that was a lovely service. I'm sure Paige would have been very happy with it." Bruce said softly.

"I didn't see you when we first started..." I trailed off knowing full well that he hadn't been there and that he disagreed with the entire search for Paige.

"I tried to get here earlier, but I was working on an experiment that didn't quite go as planned." He answered; his eyes darting around the room.

He looked haggard, not like the man I had met two years prior.

There had been something off about Bruce for some time; but since he never opened up to anyone about himself, I had no idea what he was dealing with.

It hadn't escaped my attention that he was spending less time with Tony and more time alone.

"I wasn't aware that you were currently working on anything." I replied, staring at him. "Is it anything interesting?"

"I'm not doing it for SHIELD" He laughed nervously, "It's for some colleagues actually."

He was fiddling with his glasses and he was continuously clearing his throat, as if he had something stuck in there.

"Well, at least you came. I'm sure Paige would have appreciated that." I said as I gave him a half-hearted smile and moved to leave.

"You have no idea what Paige would have liked." He hissed at me.

I turned around to look at him and saw the green tint to his irises. His nostrils were flaring and he was starting to breathe heavily.

"You never spoke to her unless it was necessary! You spent so much damned time looking for someone you didn't even know!" He all but shouted at me.

I caught a flicker of recognition from Natasha over Bruce's shoulder. Instead of creating more of a scene, I pulled him out into the corridor with me.

As soon as we were through the door he shrugged me off.

"Bruce, I don't know what's been going on with you, but I feel like you've been out of sorts for some time now." I started and shoved my hands in my pockets.

"You didn't really offer any help in finding Paige _and _you thought we should have given up long before this." I huffed out.

"Who the hell do you think you are to talk to me like this?" I asked, fighting the urge to pull my hands out of my pockets and riddle his body and face with my fists.

"Forget it Cap!" He growled at me as he turned to leave. "You aren't worth it."

He strutted away and I was left feeling enraged and even more confused than I was just minutes ago.

I made my way to my quarters to shed the suit I was wearing and to try and gather my thoughts.

Bruce's words had stung. I knew he and Paige spent time together; usually sharing a meal or two in the cafeteria or always sitting together in meetings that she was privy too.

But she was incredibly private and I couldn't imagine her opening up to Bruce so much that he would think he knew her better than anyone else.

When I reached my door, I was feeling like a hypocrite.

I didn't know Paige any better than Bruce, but I was mad at him for insinuating he did. My mind's eye went back to the first time I met her.

Before the battle in New York.

Before Phil's death.

I assumed that she would seem awestruck and out of place, but I soon discovered that she would fit right in.

She was introduced by Phil and after a brief meeting everyone went to speak with her.

If Paige was star struck, she never showed it. The only person she could have possibly known of was Tony and it's almost as if she held more disdain for him than anything else.

I could tell he was not only giving her the once over as a woman, and he wouldn't be able to deny that she was beautiful.

But he was also testing her mind and wit. I heard him ask her what her professional opinion of him was. All Paige could ask in return is whether or not he meant Tony Stark or Iron Man, because he was obviously suffering from some kind of split personality.

It was one of the only times I saw Tony at a loss for words. It was fantastic!

When I introduced myself to Paige, she immediately asked for me to call her doctor instead of ma'am. That was something I always struggled with.

She proceeded to ask me how I was adjusting to my new life. The look on her face expressed genuine curiosity and concern.

I explained how it had felt waking up and the loss of everything familiar to me.

I gave her my standard answer that it was quite the adjustment, but I was coping and learning new things every day.

She looked at me for a moment, sizing me up I was sure. Instead, she did something that no other psychologist had done for me since waking up in the 21st century.

Paige had opened herself up as a person, not a professional.

"Captain Rogers, if you ever feel like you'd like to talk about things...please feel free to come and see me." She said softly as she reached her hand out my arm. "I know what it feels like to be lost."

She smiled briefly at me before she dropped her hand, and I returned it as well as I could, but the shock was overwhelming to me.

She had opened herself up as a person, another human being; not as a person who wanted to study me.

Looking back, that may have been when I first fell for her. Her generosity in that moment and the way she spoke to me as an equal, not as a broken man...touched my heart more than I wanted to admit then.

Anyone would have given her so much credit. She came into this not knowing fully what she was signing up for.

A league of superheroes led by a one-eyed man.

But we weren't even that yet; we just a man in an iron suit, an extremely skilled spy and assassin, an archer with incomparable skills, and then me; a man that had been frozen for 70 years.

I remember that she spent a lot of time with Phil and I was consumed with what their relationship was like.

I tried to get to know her after our initial meeting, but we never really had a chance; or I wouldn't give us a chance.

And that's where we stood now...Paige was gone, stolen from us.

We had said our goodbyes and I would never have my chance to tell her that the way she looked at me all those times when she thought I was avoiding her, the time she tried to comfort me in her office...even her taking a ride on my bike; those were the times I fell in love with her.

And I sounded like a freak...a stalker. It was the oddest thing I had ever experienced. We hardly spoke and barely knew each other, yet I loved her.

That idea was haunting me as I sat in the cafe and tried to work on my crossword, but I couldn't concentrate.

Little did I know that when I walked through the door to that little cafe my life would change once again.

Paige was back and I wasn't going to let her go.

I looked on as Paige was lying limply on the black leather couch in Tony Stark's office. Pepper was sitting quietly on the floor by her, ready for her to wake up.

I knew Happy was dutifully sitting guard just outside the door, while Tony was having JARVIS run scans on her frail body.

I felt helpless just standing there having nothing to do. Tony had told me to keep my distance while work was done. My fingers itched to brush the wisps of hair away from her eyes.

I took a closer look at her and while she looked the same, I saw some vast differences.

The most notable was that her long dark brown hair was now a short cap of hair that looked more auburn. She was wearing a black t-shirt and loose jeans; the pants looked like they were huge on her, but she didn't show any signs of malnutrition. The shirt fit her better, but only slightly.

Her arms looked defined, as if she had been working out and lifting weights. Paige hadn't been out of shape before, but the woman laying there in front of us now was...built.

"Sir, brain functioning appears to be normal. Blood pressure is slightly elevated compared to her previous records." JARVIS stated.

"Thanks buddy." Tony said as he dumped the contents of her purse on his desk.

"What are you doing?" I asked, concerned. I learned enough to know that you didn't touch a woman's purse.

Tony didn't bother to look at me as he opened her wallet. I watched as he fished out her driver's license.

"Nicole Smith, 215 W 83rd Street." He looked up at me finally. "She's living in the Upper West Side."

I stared at him and then looked to Paige. She was going by a different name now?

"Steve, why don't you go through her phone? See who she calls the most?" Tony asked and I caught the small flip phone as he tossed it to me.

I opened it and found her recent call list. The only number that was in there was titled "work".

"It looks like she has a job...and only 3 contacts in her list." I said as I looked to Tony.

"She's a got a bank card, no credit cards, library card, and about 28 bucks in cash...all ones and fives." Tony said as Pepper walked over to us.

"You said her name was Nicole. Paige's middle name is Nicole." Pepper offered up. We looked at each other and then slowly our eyes drifted over to the couch where Paige was now sitting upright and rubbing her eyes.

I made to go over to her, but Pepper stopped me with a look. I scowled at her, but didn't move from my spot by Tony's desk.

Pepper walked over casually and stopped about 3 feet from her.

"Hi, my name is Pepper Potts. You fainted and my friend brought you to my office to recover." Pepper said quietly as Paige looked up at her. "How's your head?"

"I'm ok." She said as she stood slowly. "I'm Nicole, Nicole Smith." She stuck her hand out and Pepper shook it calmly.

"Can I ask you a question?" Paige or Nicole asked Pepper.

Pepper nodded.

"Have we met before? You seem really familiar, but I can't place it." Her brow furrowed and she seemed genuinely confused.

Pepper looked over to where Tony and I stood. Paige looked over to us also, and her eyes went huge.

"Oh my god! You're Tony Stark...you're Iron Man!" She squealed like a little girl. I saw Tony smirk and walk over to her.

"It's very nice to meet you...Nicole, is it?" He shook her hand and she was beaming ear to ear. Her gaze traveled over to me and if it was possible her smile got wider.

"You ARE Captain America! I knew it! I ran into you outside the cafe!" She exclaimed as she made her way to me.

I smiled as she approached me.

"It's nice to see you again." I said as she looked up at me with her big brown eyes.

"You saved me." she said quietly. I looked over her head to Tony and Pepper and they both looked concerned.

I was confused; whatever she had been through, I certainly had not rescued her.

"What do you mean?" Pepper asked her gently.

Paige's eyes widened and she shook her head.

"It's nothing...I should go." She said quickly. "It was a pleasure to meet you." She said as she stuck her hand out again for me to shake.

I took it gently and looked her square in the eyes.

"It was so wonderful to see you again." I said before I could stop myself. She seemed confused but brushed it off as she shook hands with Tony and Pepper again.

"Oh, um, Nicole. Here's my card." Pepper said as she handed her the small paper. "Why don't you call me this week and we can meet up."

"Oh, sure. I'll think about it." Paige deposited the card into her back pocket and smiled.

She headed to the door lightly shaking her head when I turned to Tony.

"We can't let her leave!" I said under my breath. Tony smiled sadly at me and simply shook his head.

Paige was standing at the door when she turned back to look at the three of us.

"I have these dreams; I have them all the time." She said quietly. "I'm trapped in a small room and when I'm finally rescued...it's you." She pointed at me and I took a tentative step towards her.

"Every dream, just before I wake up you come barging in and you call me Paige. And now you've called me Paige outside the cafe, and you all seem so familiar. Like I've been here before. I-I just feel so confused." She rushed the words out and I wanted to move to her and wrap my arms around in comfort.

"I think you should look at this." Tony spoke up from behind me. Paige walked back over to us slowly and looked at the file he had tossed on the desk.

She slowly opened the folder and I realized what Tony had given her.

Staring up from the file were two pictures: one of Paige's official SHIELD ID card, and the other was the picture of Paige, Phil and The Avengers team.

She looked at the pictures for what felt like an eternity and then she finally looked up at us.

"That's me...how is that me?" she asked us as she fought back tears.

"I think it's going to be a long story." Pepper said as she led Paige back to the couch.

A long story didn't seem to be the half of it...Paige didn't even know who we were, and we had no idea why.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: My lovely beta yagalinus0420 is on vacation...but i think she would love this chapter. A little angst, a little drama and then some filler...sorry! :) I wanted to get this finished and posted today, because it's my birthday! I also finally got the bug to update my other story The Walk, so I'll be working on that today! **

**As always, please leave a review...I have the time to respond to them all...so go ahead! And to the two guest reviews I got...Thanks!**

**Enjoy! And to those of you in the States...Have a happy and safe Independence Day!**

**Paige POV**

I had read human interest stories in the paper about people who won the lottery. You know what almost all of those people had to say? That it was like all their dreams came true.

HA! I got those people beat.

Ever since I had woken up in the hospital, caught up on the last few years of events since I couldn't remember anything, I found out who the Avengers were I had dreams about Captain America rescuing me.

Dr. Barnes said my dreams were normal for someone who had been in a coma.

They were always the same: I was trapped in a small room and then it would flash to me strapped to a table with people looking at me through a large window.

Then he swoops in...Captain America.

I would probably be swooning, but I wasn't really sure what swooning was.

The one thing I always omitted from my sessions with Dr. Barnes is the way he looks at me when he comes to save the day...

_He looks at me like I'm his entire world._

I'm sure my subconscious was really just playing games with me. I mean, Dr. Barnes explained that my mind would have felt trapped in the coma, and my dreams are a representation of that.

_Then why does he call me Paige in the dream...and now I'm apparently this person._

I needed some answers...now.

I looked back down at the file that sat in my lap and shifted slightly on the leather sofa. I could feel three sets of eyes staring at me, but I couldn't bring myself to look up at them.

I was flipping through the papers in the file, but I wasn't really concentrating the way I should have been.

I cleared my throat and looked up to them.

"I don't understand any of this." I said glancing back down at the file. "Can someone try to explain this to me?"

Pepper came to sit next to me on the sofa, but I noticed she kept her distance choosing to sit on the opposite end. She looked at me for a moment and then looked back to where the Iron Man and Captain Hunk...I mean America still stood by the desk.

"Actually uh Nicole, why don't you tell us a little about yourself..." Pepper said while looking lost.

I shrugged, "That's going to be a little difficult." I said with a shake of my head.

"Why?" That question came from Mr. Stark whose eyes were blazing with curiosity from across the room.

"Well, I was in a coma and I don't remember anything about my life before that!" I stood up and started pacing.

"Everything I know about me was gained through records of my previous life. I was able to track down my birth certificate, my high school transcripts; my parent's death certificates...everything I know about myself came in a file very similar to this that one!" I said as I pointed a finger at the paperwork that had fallen off my lap when I got up.

"Can you tell us what you do know?"

Captain America finally decides to chime in...lovely.

"I was born in Bozeman Montana. I'm an only child, my parents died when I was in my junior year in high school and then I left after I graduated. I moved to New York, got in an accident and here I am." I sighed, exasperation heavy in my voice.

I watched as Stark and the Captain looked at each other and had what appeared to be a silent conversation.

"I agree, it sounds very familiar...but don't you think she would have been a little old for a Red Room type of experiment?" Stark asked quietly.

"Red Room? What experiments are you talking about?" I asked walking closer to them.

"It's just a thought right now." Stark said with a smile that I'm sure was designed to dazzle people, women in particular.

"Cut the crap!" I all but shouted. "Tell me why you think I'm...Paige."

"Sure, ok. Have a seat Ms. Smith." Stark said with a shake of his head.

"Everything that we know about Dr. Paige Nicole Smith is in that file." Stark said as he paced in front of me as I resumed my seat on the sofa. I picked up the file and began going through it again, with renewed vigor.

"We are affiliated with an organization and you were employed by them...or rather, Paige was employed by them. Paige was a criminal psychologist brought in to help us-" he gestured between himself and the Captain, "With any issues that may come up with our mental health."

I nodded, I was reading about her education; graduated summa cum laude from the University of Missouri with a degree in psychology. She worked freelance with the Kansas City Police department while owning her own practice.

She saw mostly troubled teens and young adults before joining SHIELD.

I looked again at the security photo of an ID card for Dr. Paige Smith. There was no question it was me...or at least I was supposed to be her.

I was starting to feel really confused.

"So, how is it that I'm sitting here as Nicole Smith, when you're telling me I'm a doctor? And that my real name is _Paige Nicole Smith?" _ I asked as I closed the file and place it on the cushion next to me.

"About a year ago, we believe you were kidnapped." Stark started. "You were staying in a hotel here in New York; you were on leave from the Helicarrier. You had an appointment here the morning we discovered you were missing."

"Why did I have an appointment here?" I asked. "If you were essentially Paige's patient, why was she coming here?"

I watched as they all shared a look, and it made me uneasy.

"SHIELD has certain protocols in place to ensure the safety of its members and employees." Stark told me and I let out a very unladylike snort.

"Problem?" He asked me critically.

"Safety protocols...Paige went missing?" I rolled my eyes, "They're doing a stellar job!"

Pepper smirked beside me and the Captain laughed quietly.

"Point taken." Stark said as he crossed the room to retrieve a drink from the bar.

"Anyway, one of those protocols is that you are required to have a blood test taken every 6 months. Apparently something was found in Paige's..._your _blood panel that was a concern to SHIELD." Stark explained as he sipped his drink.

"What do you mean _something was found_? If I really am Paige, is there something wrong with me?" I asked feeling slightly concerned.

When I left the hospital the doctors gave me no indication that there was anything wrong with me except for the memory loss.

"We don't believe so." Pepper offered up. "We took the liberty of obtaining your records after you went missing and what we found is actually quite remarkable."

I heard Captain mutter something under his breath, but I chose to ignore him.

"Well, what is it? Am I actually a superhero too?" I asked on a laugh and continued laughing until I noticed the look passed between Pepper and Stark.

As my laughter died down and realization set in...

_I am NOT a superhero! That's absurd._

"Paige, do you know how Steve Rogers came to be Captain America?" Stark asked me.

I shook my head and tried to calm my heartbeat.

"I haven't a clue." I answered.

"Cap, you want to take this one?" Stark turned to where the man stood and I saw him nod slightly.

"I wasn't always like this..." Steve started. He explained to me about being failed attempts to join the Army. Meeting Dr. Erskine and being injected with the serum.

He then told me about how SHIELD and other agencies thought the formula for the serum had been lost and with the doctor's assassination, no one had been able to duplicate it.

I sat back and took it all in. I couldn't understand why they would pick a kid that was weakly for the experiment, and maybe Steve recognized the question in my eyes.

He explained that Erskine had chosen him because the doctor knew that a hero should have heart...and that he saw that in Steve.

When I had received my history lesson on Captain America, the serum, and the defeat of Red Skull I sat feeling more than a little overwhelmed.

"I just have one question right now..." I said as three sets of eyes looked at me intently.

"What does this have to do with me?"

When I returned to my apartment that evening, my head reeling from all the information I had become privy to, I wasn't alone.

And that did not sit well with me.

I had agreed after some deliberation to return to Stark Tower the following afternoon.

Blood tests...Tony Stark wanted my blood.

If I hadn't been so preoccupied with the why, I would have been creeped out by the way the Iron Man had looked at me.

I put my key in the lock and turned to look at my companion.

Steve Rogers.

He had asked me to call him by his given name and I agreed, mostly because referring to him as Captain America sounded a bit ridiculous.

I turned around to face him and I saw that he was staring intently at me.

"Thank you for seeing me home." I said nervously. "Would you like to come in for a bit?"

He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.

"Normally, I would say that it would be inappropriate, but these aren't really normal circumstances, are they?" he asked.

I turned back around, opening the door and flipping the light switch as I walked in. He followed me and I heard him shut and lock the door.

"I wasn't expecting company." I said lamely as I picked up my tennis shoes and tossed them into my bedroom doorway.

"Make yourself comfortable." I gestured to the small living room as I went to my kitchen.

"I'm going to have a drink, would you like one?" I asked as I opened the cupboard.

"Sure." He nodded and I pulled to mismatched glasses out and set them on the counter.

I moved to icebox, feeling his eyes on me the entire time. I pulled an ice cube tray from the freezer and popped a few out for each glass.

"When I was getting ready to leave the hospital, a local church kind of came to my rescue." I started, feeling myself getting ready to babble.

"I had lost my apartment and didn't have any money. I was offered a place to stay at the church until I got back on my feet. I found a job and started to save every penny I made."

I reached above the icebox and grabbed the bottle of bourbon and poured the amber liquid into both glasses.

I handed one to him and he followed me to the living room. I gestured again for him to sit and he did so on the futon that served as my couch.

"When I was ready to look for my own place, the church took up a donation for me. Clothes, home goods; there was even a large monetary donation." I took a sip of my drink and settled on the bean bag that sat opposite the futon.

"It was large enough to actually cover the deposit and first month's rent. I used my savings for my utilities." I sighed as my verbal diarrhea continued.

"The first month I was here, I worked almost non-stop it seemed. When I finally had a whole day off to myself, I ended up going out for milk." I stopped to look at Steve and he was staring at me intently again.

"I bought the milk and a bottle of bourbon. I can't remember if I was much of a drinker before, but I knew I liked it and I wanted it." I shrugged as I took another drink.

"I drank the entire bottle...and I have no idea why I'm telling you this." I muttered as I looked away from him.

"I'm sure you had a massive hangover the next day." he said with a smile.

I laughed quietly, "No, I didn't. It was amazing. I got up and went to work like I hadn't drunk an entire bottle."

Steve frowned slightly at my admission, "I actually can't get drunk either. The way my cells regenerate because of the serum..." he trailed off and we were sitting in my living room in an awkward, but not entirely uncomfortable silence.

"Paige can we talk about this?" He finally asked. I grimaced when used that name.

"I'm sorry." He murmured softly. I shook my head.

"It's ok. I understand that this could be difficult if you've ever only known me as...her." I couldn't bring myself to say her name anymore.

It was difficult to think that I was someone else.

He nodded, "It hard to imagine sitting here with you as Nicole...when to me you will always be Paige."

"Do you think I'll ever remember?" I asked quietly. His eyes shot to mine and I thought he was mad at first.

"I mean, do you think I could ever be Paige again?"

"I hope so..." he answered softly.

The silence set in again, so I decided to finally bring up the subject we had both been avoiding.

"So...this serum business? What happens now?" I asked as I finished my drink and went to place my glass in the sink.

"Well, when Tony checked your medical file and saw that you had trace amounts of something that had a similar make up of the serum that's running through my body, he came to the conclusion that at some point you came into contact with it." He explained to me, even though I had heard this same story about an hour ago.

"Ok, so now I give a sample of my blood to confirm?" I asked as I sat back down on the bean bag.

"Yes." Steve nodded and stood to put his own glass away.

"Somehow someone was able to replicate the serum. In the wrong hands it can be extremely dangerous." He said as he sat back down on the futon.

"If we can figure out who took you...maybe we can find out who has been working on the serum."

I sighed. This all seemed like something out of a movie...or preferably a good book.

I was just a waitress who had lost a huge chunk of her life.

I wasn't a psychologist working for a secretive agency that employed superheroes.

"Can you tell me about Paige?" I asked Steve after a moment.

He snapped his head up to look at me and I saw his Adam's apple bob up and down as he swallowed.

"What do you mean?" he countered.

"What was she like?" I said as I moved to futon. "Maybe we like the same things...I don't know. That probably sounds ridiculous."

"No, that actually makes sense." Steve cleared his throat.

"Paige was brilliant but not in an overly egotistical way, you know what I mean?" he asked with shinning eyes.

I shrugged, "She wasn't shoving it in people's faces?"

Steve laughed and it was so cute.

"No, she never did that. In fact, I think she thought that the only reason she had accomplished all she had was because she dedicated herself to being better. I think she thought that she had something to prove." Steve told me as he turned slightly to face me.

"He parents died when she was very young and she spent time in an orphanage and being bounced around from foster home to foster home." He smiled and closed his eyes, like he was trying to remember exactly what she had confided in him.

"I think she felt that because of that, working to be the best was the only way she would survive."

"That makes sense. When I woke up and realized that I had no memory of anything, I knew that if I could piece my life back together I could make it." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.

"Maybe its self-perseverance. I knew that even if no one was there to take care of me, I could take care of myself. I had to." I finally said.

Steve smiled at me and I so wanted to reach out and grasp his hand.

"Paige would agree with that sentiment. Although, I don't think she was very sentimental." He looked away from me and shook his head slightly.

"She had a hard time getting close to people or letting them get close to her. Pepper told me that they were getting closer, but Paige disappeared soon after that..." he trailed off.

I felt a sadness wash over me. Just from this small description of this woman, I felt like we really could be the same person.

I had trouble making and keeping friends. I was wary of people and felt like if I didn't deem them to be a quality person, then I couldn't bring myself to be friends with them.

I knew that sounded terrible, but I would rather feel alone than have toxic relationships with people.

"She must have felt very alone." I said quietly. Steve looked back to be and shrugged.

"It seems like you two were close though...I mean you seem to know a lot about her." I offered up wondering if maybe there was more to the relationship between the doctor and this captain.

Steve chuckled and I wasn't sure what the joke was.

"Paige and I weren't close at all." He sighed, "She tried to help me, she made herself vulnerable to me and I pushed her away."

He related to me about his one and only session with Paige and how he felt that she couldn't possibly understand how he felt. He lost his best friend after saving him and lost the woman that would have probably been the love of his life.

"That was before I learned that she was orphaned at such a young age. She understood the dynamic of loss...but I was too stubborn..." he muttered and leaned back and closed his eyes.

"You talk about her like she's a lost cause...or that you are." I said after a few moments.

"Isn't she?" he replied. "Does any of this trigger anything for you?"

"No, it doesn't...but that doesn't mean I won't ever remember, right?" I countered.

"I guess not." Steve looked at me and I was drawn into his eyes.

"I won't pretend that I want you to look at me and tell me that you remember; that you, as Paige, can tell me everything that happened to you in the last year." He closed his eyes for a moment, almost as if he was trying to clear away any tears that may be there.

"But as much as I'll wait for that day for as long as I live...my duty is to this country and its people. You are one of those people Nicole; my responsibility is to find out if you have been subjected to the serum and to do what I can to help you through that."

I nodded as I felt my own eyes fill with tears.

There was a small part of me, maybe the juvenile part that wanted my dreams to come true, that wanted to hear Steve tell me that none of that mattered.

He would tell me that all that mattered was that I or Paige was safe and alive.

I wondered how invested he was in Paige; the way he spoke of her made it seem like he cared for her. But he confessed that they hadn't been extremely close.

I couldn't wrap my mind around the seeming contradiction.

All I wanted since I came out of that coma was to have someone care for me; to talk about me with quiet reverence like Steve did about Paige.

I blinked several times to try to clear my eyes and my head.

"If she was here, what would you say to her?" I asked quietly. I wasn't sure why I was asking this specific question or if I even wanted to hear his answer.

"She's not here...not yet." He replied. "Maybe not ever."

I nodded and went to stand. I was ready to go to bed; my mind completely exhausted.

Steve seemed to understand my intentions and stood as well.

"Would like me to pick you up tomorrow?" he asked me as he moved to the door.

"Sure, that would be great. Thank you." I answered with the best smile I could muster.

He nodded and unlocked the door. Before he left he turned to look at me one last time.

"Uh Nicole, Paige may not be here...but you are." He started softly. "You're important too."

I nodded dumbly, unable to speak.

"Would you be willing to let me in? To get to know you...it might make it easier if she never comes back." He said finally.

"Um, sure." I shrugged not knowing what he truly meant.

"How about lunch tomorrow? After everything?" he smiled then. It was small, but I saw it creep up to his eyes.

I nodded, fearing my own voice. I moved over to the door as he opened it and stepped into the hallway.

He bid me goodnight and I locked the door behind him.

As I stood by my front door I slowly realized that Captain America, the literal man of dreams, had asked me to lunch.

I grinned and shook my head slowly. I turned out the lights and made my way to my bedroom.

After going through my nightly routine, I settled in bed and let myself drift off to sleep.

That night I experienced a different dream than I had since I came back to consciousness.

I was standing on a dark street with a faceless man. I couldn't hear anything he was saying to me but I felt terrified, but defiant.

I knew that whoever this man was wouldn't hurt me purposefully, but there was an underlying concern for my safety.

I felt tears stream down my face as his bright green eyes glowed at me before he ran away.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: I'm sorry that it has taken me this long to update...and that this is a shorter chapter than the others. I've had some medical issues come up in RL with me and my hubs, so writing kinda got put on the back burner. This may seem like filler or fluff, and it partly is :) It may also seems slightly disjointed, like there are a lot of things being thought or said and they seem to have no rhyme or reason. Most of it is setting things up for the next few chapters. Ok, a few huge thankk you's! 1) yagalinus0420...who is still my beta, even if she did me leave me for vacation and JUST got back...and is behind on several chapters...I'll excuse her for that! She's awesome and crazy! To DemonicSymphony: your simple review for chapter 6...left me confused for a bit...when I went back read it, I knew what you meant so THANKS! To the ever endearing ym4yum1...thank you for always picking out the things you like and telling me so! I love to see what you pick up...I'll be reviewing for you today! To the 2 guest reviews...they rocked, I wish I could have replied back! Join up or sign in so we can count you as our own! Finally, to anyone following this story...whether you folowed, favorited, or put me author alert...THANKS! Those emails are almost as good at the ones with reviews. Please leave me some love...this story could always use some more!  
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**Disclaimer: Of course I don't own Marvel or any of its characters, storylines, or anything else...because I'm me...oh! I'm also not Joss Whedon...which I'm sure my husband is grateful for everyday!**

**Paige Pov**

When I woke up from the nightmare, I found my body slicked with a thin sheen of sweat. I untangled myself from my covers and swung my feet over the side of my bed. Leaning forward on my thighs, I tried to catch my breath.

When I felt like I had sucked in enough air I stood slowly and walked to my tiny bathroom. I flicked on the light and was met with my frightening reflection in the mirror. I shook my head and used the toilet.

While washing my hands I decided to make use of the early hour and try out the new gym membership I had just bought. I washed face quickly and was brushing my teeth when I heard the distinctive sound of my cell phone ringing.

I was surprised to hear it at first, but I remembered that I had given it to the three people I met yesterday.

I reached it just in time and hadn't bothered to look at who was actually calling me.

"Hello?" I answered quietly.

"_Hi, did I wake you?" _Steve asked me shyly; his voice laced with apology.

"No, I woke up from a nightmare and decided to get up." I told him as I went to my dresser to pull out my workout clothes.

"_Are you alright?" _ He asked me, the concern evident in his voice.

"I'm fine. What's up?" I asked, wanting to desperately change the subject.

"_Um, well...I couldn't sleep either." _He said, and I could hear the shyness creeping back up slightly.

"_Would you like to get breakfast?" _ He asked finally.

I smiled to myself. When I first realized who it was, I was worried that he might have changed his mind about spending time with me today.

"I was planning on going to the gym actually." I replied and I heard a sigh escape from him. "Do you want to come with?"

"_Sure. I can be there in about 10 minutes." _He said before ending the call.

I couldn't help but feel a little slighted; he never used my name.

Either name.

I figured it may have been difficult to call me Paige when I obviously wasn't that person anymore, but I was Nicole...he could have said it at least once.

I shook my head at the petty thought. As much as I was going through, learning that I was a completely different person, he was dealing with a similar set of problems. The person he knew was no longer here, and a stranger was in her place.

I quickly changed as I let my mind wander. There was one thing that was bothering me and I made a mental note to bring it up later.

I heard a knock on my front door and moved to peek out of the privacy hole. I saw Steve standing on my doorstep, hair disheveled and in what appeared to be his own exercise attire carrying two cups of coffee. I opened the door and welcomed him in.

"I took a chance and got you some coffee." he said in lieu of a greeting. I smiled as I took the cup from him.

"Thanks, although coffee doesn't do much for me." I said as I took a sip of the hot liquid.

Steve looked at me with a curious expression on his face. I felt my cheeks heat up under his gaze.

"What do you mean?" He asked me finally. I shrugged as I set the cup down and began pulling on my socks.

"I don't get a boost from the caffeine." I said as nonchalantly as possible. "Soda doesn't do much for me either."

Steve considered what I said for a moment before commenting.

"I only drink it out of habit honestly." He said softly. "I don't get a buzz from coffee, soda, or liquor."

I nodded at him recalling our conversation over bourbon the night before.

I slipped my shoes on and tightened the laces.

"It's a side effect of serum, right?" I asked as I stood and reached for the coffee cup.

Steve shook his head a little as I pulled on a light jacket I kept on a peg by the door.

"Not necessarily," was his simple answer. "I can only speak for myself, but things that usually have a big effect on other people don't have the same effect on me."

I nodded as we moved out into the hall of my apartment building. I locked up behind us and we made our way downstairs to the street.

As we moved through the city early in the morning, I felt a comfortable silence surround us.

"So...umm," he started with a sheepish grin. "Do you always go to the gym after a nightmare?"

I shook my head as we continued down the street.

"No, I just joined the gym last week. I usually just go for a run." I answered with a shrug.

"Do you have nightmares often?" he asked casually, but I saw him staring at from the corner of my eye.

"Actually no. My dreams always involved being saved...by you." I said, feeling suddenly shy.

"Any other dreams I didn't really remember."

We remained silent as we crossed the streets and finally reaching the gym.

After I signed up both in Steve told me he wanted to "check out the weight situation", so I moved to the treadmills.

I got myself set up and started the run.

I was lost in my thoughts and got caught up thinking about the first run I took after I was discharged from the hospital.

I was feeling depressed about my lack of family or friends and was feeling so alone in the world.

So I laced up some sneakers and took off. It felt like I was flying and I instantly loved it and had the feeling that I had loved it before I went into the coma.

When I got back, I realized I had been gone for almost 2 hours.

I wasn't winded. My legs and back weren't sore.

I figured that later that night or the next day I would feel it; I never did.

Since that first run, I mapped out my route. All in all on a typical day I ran 20 miles.

It never occurred to me that there was an underlying cause to my motivation and stamina. I just thought that my body was used to it.

Now I had the idea that I might have been subjected, injected with something that would boost my metabolic system.

I noticed someone moving in my peripheral vision. I glanced down to the display and noticed that I had run 10 miles already. I was moving at a slower pace than I was used to, but I had wanted to get a feel for the machine.

I heard someone clear their throat and I looked to my left. There stood Steve in all his sweaty, glistening glory.

"If you want to get a shower before you have to be back at the tower, we should go." He said simply.

I nodded and started to cool down a bit. As soon as I was done I hopped off and took a huge drink from the bottle of water he handed me.

"13.7 miles...we've only been here for 45 minutes." Steve said, his voice laced with curiosity.

"I could have done more, but I'd rather have that shower." I answered with a shrug.

We made our way out of the gym and were met with what looked like the beginning of a beautiful day.

The comfortable silence I had enjoyed during our walk from my apartment had turned awkward on the way back. I couldn't take it anymore.

"What's on your mind, Steve?" I asked as we waited to cross the street.

"It's just," he sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "It's just weird. And I'm sure it's even worse for you...to think that you may be someone else, but we thought she was gone and we had a memorial. And here you are, looking like her, talking like her...you are her..." he trailed off and I knew where he was going with this.

"But I'm not?" I asked as we continued to make our way down the street. He nodded.

I took a deep breath, "I don't know what's going on, and this is difficult for me...but maybe all this happened for a reason."

"Something bigger than us?" Steve asked quietly and I nodded in affirmation.

I wasn't specifically religious. I volunteered at the church that had helped me when I was released from the hospital, but I didn't attend services. I just didn't have the inclination to do so.

But I did believe that everything happened for a reason.

The "accident" and being in a coma. Obviously and quite literally running into Captain America.

I even felt like if we found out that I had undergone the same treatment Steve had all those years ago, that there had to be a reason for it.

When we reached my apartment I offered to let Steve use my shower and bathroom to clean up. He told me to go first, so I headed into my bedroom and shut the door behind me. I could hear Steve tinkering around in the apartment, but instead of feeling nervous that he could be going through my stuff, I felt comfortable.

It was odd for me. I hadn't had anyone in here since I moved in, and it was oddly comforting to know I wasn't alone.

After throwing my dirty clothes into the hamper, I took a quick shower. I wanted to try to save Steve some hot water.

I climbed out after I had rinsed my hair and wrapped my robe around me quickly. As I wiped the steam from the mirror, I took a good look at myself.

Short hair that had a dull brown color to it. I sometimes used a cheap box of hair dye to brighten it up a little, but hadn't had the inclination to do it for some time.

I took a closer look at my face when I noticed a faint scar. I had seen it before and honestly thought nothing of it. It was a line that was perpendicular to my upper lip. I didn't remember how I had gotten it, but I did remember something glaringly obvious;

Out of the few pictures I had seen, Paige did not have this scar.

I felt myself take a sharp intake of breath and immediately thought that I wasn't her. This scar looked old. It wasn't red and I saw no lingering traces of scabbing.

My breathing increased but I tried to calm myself down.

Maybe I got it in the accident I thought.

Maybe there wasn't an accident.

I was feeling confused all over again. I knew I would have to point this out to Steve, but I was worried that he would take it at face value, walk out of my door, and I would never see him again.

_But I just got him back!_

I was startled by my own thoughts. I had literally just met Steve a day ago. How could I think I had gotten him back?

_You know that you know him._

Again my thoughts caught me off guard. I felt like an old cartoon with the angel and devil on opposing shoulders; except the devil was nowhere in sight.

I sighed and moved into my bedroom to get dressed. I pulled on a pair of khaki Bermuda shorts and a green sleeveless shirt. I dug around in my closet for a moment until I found my Converse. These were the only things that remained with me from the time I was admitted to the hospital to moving into this apartment.

I finger combed my hair and hung my robe laid my robe at the end of my bed. I straightened the covers and pulled a clean towel out of my laundry basket. After folding it and setting on the bathroom counter, I emerged from my room.

I walked into the living room and smelled something familiar.

I walked to the kitchen to find Steve flipping French toast onto a plate.

"I left a clean towel for you on the bathroom counter." I said to alert him of my presence. He looked up at me and smiled.

I was taken aback at how perfect he looked standing in my tiny kitchen. It was as if he was meant to be there.

"Thanks. I hope you like French toast." He said with a smile as he handed the plate to me. I nodded as I took it from him.

"It's my favorite actually." I said as I moved to the living room to sit on the futon. He joined me a minute later with his own plate and took a seat next to me.

"I figured it was the least I could do since you're letting me shower here." Steve said softly just before taking a bite of the cooked bread. I smiled and then immediately gulped as I watched him wrap his lips around his fork and take the bite.

"You haven't touched your plate." Steve said and I blinked my eyes several times and tried to wipe the mental image of his lips from my mind. I dropped my eyes to his plate to see that he had finished.

"Oh." Was my brilliant answer and began to eat. It was simple and good.

The man could make me French toast anytime.

"Well, I'll go get in the shower so we can leave." Steve said as he stood and moved to the kitchen. I heard him turn on the faucet and jumped up quickly.

"I'll do the dishes, since you cooked." I blurted out as I came round to the kitchen with a mouthful of food.

"Ok then." Steve wiped his hands on the dish towel and moved past me to my bedroom.

After a moment I heard the shower turn on and I moved to the kitchen to assess the damage. Luckily, it appeared that Steve was a clean cook. The eggshells were in the garbage already and the bread and vanilla were put away. All I literally had to do were the dishes.

I moved everything over to the sink, not wanting to turn the water on just yet. Instead I went and checked my phone.

I had no new calls or messages, but I wasn't surprised by that. I called my boss quickly and told him that I had a doctor's appointment and wouldn't make it in today. I was lucky enough to have a boss that understood my predicament with the accident. He knew there would be appointments and if I felt something was wrong, he would be kind enough to excuse me without a thought to go get myself checked out.

He was gracious and understanding. He always gave me a wink and smile when I showed up at the diner and had told me from day one to let him know if anyone gave me any grief. I wasn't sure what he could do, since he was pushing 70, but it was nice to have someone in my corner.

After I hung up I moved back to the kitchen sink and figured it was safe to clean up.

I was just finishing up when Steve walked out of my room. His hair was wet from the shower, but he appeared in clean jeans and a white t-shirt. In his hand was a small gym bag. I had forgotten he'd brought it up with him when we got back.

"Feel better?" I asked as I dried my hands. He nodded and I saw him shifting on his feet.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I turned to face him.

"It's just a little strange to use your shower." He said with a nervous laugh. "I mean, we really just met yesterday and..." he trailed off, and I could tell he was slightly embarrassed.

I laughed hard. It was slightly bizarre to see Captain America standing in front of me, embarrassed because he had used my shower.

"Steve, I know it had to be hard adjusting to the 21st century, but it's totally fine." I said after I had calmed down.

He mumbled a thank you and I went to grab my purse. I fished out my sunglasses and keys and gestured to the door.

He moved to unlock it and opened it, holding it open for me.

I walked to the door when some of my earlier thoughts came flooding back to me. I stopped in the threshold and looked up to him.

His eyes were expectant and his face was smiling.

"Steve, this may sound weird, but..." I looked down to examine the toes of my shoes. "If you aren't going to call me Nicole, I think I could get used to you calling me Paige." I said quickly as I stepped out into the hall.

I was catching my breath after my little announcement and after a moment he joined me the hall while I locked the door.

He didn't say anything to me as we made our way down the stairs and out to the street. Once we were on the sidewalk he turned to look at me.

"Why don't we take my bike over?" He asked with a smile. "Would that be ok with you...Nicole?"


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: I know its been a couple weeks since I updated, buuuutttt...it was my birthday week! And then my hubs had his birthday! And RL has just been crazy! Lots of medical issues going on and dealing with my hubs Naval retirement. ALL my love and devotion to yagalinus0420: I literally wrote this chapter in 2 days because of her! She bounces ideas with me all the time and helps me work out the kinks, (even though we really like the kinks!). She's a doll and such a fount of inspiration! **_

_**As always...read, enjoy, review? I don't beg for them, at least I really try not to, but can you guys give me some? Even if you just say you liked it/loved it/hated it! Please leave me some loving?**_

_**Same disclaimers apply!**_

**Cap POV**

_3 months later_

"_Harder, I need you harder!" She screamed as I pounded relentlessly. This was definitely a perk of the serum. I was pretty sure I could go all night._

"_Nicole, I can't keep up with you...Turn this way." I flipped us over so she was straddling me._

_I watched her breasts as they bounced up and down; sweat dripping off every inch of our bodies._

"_I just need a little more...CAP!" She screamed._

"Cap! Hello? Earth to Steve?" Nicole called out as I landed flat on my back.

I looked around for a minute feeling dazed. I saw Tony smirking at me from just outside the boxing ring Nicole and I were currently in. Pepper had a bottle of water and was taunting me with it.

"Get up old man; I know you're better than that." Nicole offered her hand to me and I took it graciously as I stood.

"Where's your head at?" She asked with a lazy smile. I grinned back at her and shook my head.

"I'm a little distracted this morning. Cut me some slack! I'm like 90 years old!" I said with a laugh.

Nicole had taken to calling me 'old man' while I was helping her with training.

"Maybe I should cut in for a bit Capsicle. You look a little flushed." Tony said as he cleared his throat and stepped between the ropes.

He came close to me and grinned, and with his stupid facial hair, he had the look of the devil himself.

"All the shop talk getting to your v-card?" He teased smugly. I rolled my eyes and shoved him away from me and stepped out of the ring.

I took the bottle that Pepper offered me and plopped down on the floor. I tried to clear my head of the mental images that were running through my mind.

The dream last night was by far the most graphic and real to me. I had woken up sweaty and hard; internally begging that she was in my bed with me.

But Nicole was never there.

3 months ago our suspicions were confirmed. She had been exposed not only to the serum, but to Vita-Rays.

Stark had no idea where someone would have found the plans, let alone the materials needed to build the machine.

After we had run some endurance tests on Nicole, we found that she easily kept up with me, sometimes even surpassing me. She was strong and fast and could last longer in any sparring that we did.

Tony and I had been helping her with training, but we knew she was feeling restless going up against the two of us day in and day out.

So after much convincing and debating, Tony and I had decided to bring Natasha and Clint in on our little secret.

The only thing I can really say about that was for once Natasha was at a loss for words and Clint spoke up.

"_What do you mean you found Paige? When?" Clint asked us as Tony and I met them in his office._

_Natasha stared dumbly at us as we explained everything we knew at that point._

One thing that they both agreed on was that they wanted to see her for themselves; and that was before Natasha agreed to train with us.

I had apologized profusely for keeping this from them, but in all honesty, we thought the less people involved, the better.

I looked over at Pepper who was sitting on the couch behind me and she smiled gently.

"I know your secret." She sing-songed at me. I was confused until she jerked her head in the direction of Tony and Nicole.

Nicole had her head thrown back and was laughing at whatever Tony had just said to her and I knew the smile on my face was mile wide.

"Does she know how you feel?" Pepper asked quietly. I simply shook my head. I couldn't face Pepper to tell her the truth; that I wasn't even sure how I felt.

I wanted her; every red-blooded American cell in my body wanted her. But the part of me that had thought I loved Paige...well, that part loved and wanted Nicole too.

"You should tell her soon." Pepper pushed gently, "If she ever comes back to us as Paige, she'll probably be confused."

I turned to look at Pepper to respond when I saw Natasha and Clint standing in the doorway.

I watched them as I slowly got to my feet and saw them watching Nicole spar with Tony.

Walking over to them I noticed that the grunts from both people in the ring had ceased.

"Hey guys, I'm glad you came." I said quietly, not wanting to interrupt whatever their thoughts were.

Clint was the first to speak, "Dammit Cap! It's really her, isn't it?"

I nodded slightly as we both stood and watched Natasha move towards the ring.

"Hey Tash." Tony started before she cut him off with a glare. She said nothing as she stepped into the ring and Tony quickly exited.

Natasha circled like a vulture, waiting for the right moment to attack the road kill that was Nicole.

She lunged but Nicole didn't flinch. She stared Natasha down with such ferocity that I was sure we were in for one hell of a fight.

"It's about time we had a decent girl fight." Tony muttered as he came to stand by me.

"You look the same, but different." Natasha accused loudly enough for all of us to hear.

"I have a scar on my lip now...Paige never had one." Nicole offered up, never taking her eyes away from the other woman.

"I knew Paige, I liked her. She was...my friend." Natasha said simply.

"I'm not Paige, at least not now. I don't really remember anything." Nicole said, eyeing her up and down.

"But I'm fairly certain I can take anything you can dish out."

I saw Natasha quirk an eyebrow at her and a snarl came over her face.

"I seriously doubt that." She said defensively. I watched Nicole as she was poised to strike, but I knew she wouldn't take the hit. She'd let Natasha have that one.

I watched as Natasha swung out with a left uppercut, but Nicole deftly moved out of the way of impact.

"I've heard you can do better than that." Nicole taunted. For just a moment Natasha looked confused and then a hint of a smile passed her lips.

"Paige used to say the same thing when I would go easy on her in the gym."

With that single comment, Nicole threw a right jab that landed squarely on Natasha's left cheek and swung down to kick her legs out from underneath her.

I gasped and I saw Clint and Tony slacked-jawed, staring at the scene in front of us.

Nicole stood over a surprised Natasha with a smile, but kept her distance and didn't offer her a hand up.

"I told you I wasn't Paige." He voiced wavered lightly and my heart and head told me to break this up now.

I felt someone grip my arm and turned to see Clint holding me back.

"Just watch." He said quietly. I turned to look back at the ring to find Natasha awkwardly hug Nicole.

I could faintly make out Nicole mumbling reassurances to Natasha.

"It's ok Nat, I'm ok." She kept repeating as she wrapped her arms around Natasha and rubbed her back.

I watched as the two women separated and Natasha looked over to me and smiled softly.

"What do you need from me?" She asked simply.

Several hours later I watched as Clint wrapped Natasha's wrist. She was bruised and a little bloody, but she had sparred with Nicole for almost 3 hours.

I knew she wasn't hurt, but she liked to wrap them for stability after a workout.

"Thanks for working with me today Nat. I really appreciate it." Nicole said sincerely as she made her way out the locker room where she had showered and changed.

"Anytime, I know how boring those two can get." Natasha said with a smile as she gestured between me and Tony.

I smirked and heard Tony cough to cover a laugh.

"We're not boring, we just have more experience." Tony said smugly. "Now get the hell out of my building."

He walked away as he said it and we all smiled as we gathered our belongings.

"So Nicole, have you met anyone else from our motley crew yet?" Clint asked as we made our way down the elevator and into the garage.

Nicole simply shook her head. I gave her a long look as I pulled the helmets from the saddlebags on my bike.

We had discussed going to Director Fury as soon as we discovered the truth about Nicole; her being Paige and the serum and the Vita-Rays.

Nicole said she wanted more time to see if she could remember anything more.

So far she hadn't.

I watched as Natasha and Nicole exchanged phone numbers and I heard Tasha promise to help with training.

Nicole strapped the helmet on as Clint and Natasha walked away and as soon as I had started the bike and we were both settled we took off.

I navigated directly to Nicole's apartment. It had become somewhat of our routine. After every meeting or training session together, we would ride back to her place and sit and talk for awhile. Later we might go to the cafe where we met again or just order in.

It was incredibly difficult for me to do this with her almost every day. To be this close to Nicole, the woman that took Paige's spot in my heart and mind, and have it seem so platonic.

All I really wanted was to gather her up in my arms and kiss her gently.

I just wasn't sure I'd be able to stop if I did. I would if she asked me of course, but it would be so hard.

"Steve, did you hear me?" Nicole asked me, snapping me out of my thoughts. I had pulled up and parked in front of her building.

"I'm sorry." I shook my head at her. "What were you saying?"

She smiled softly at me, "Losing your hearing old man? I said we should do something different tonight."

I laughed quietly, "You think so? What do you think we should do?"

Nicole shrugged and looked positively nervous.

"I don't know, but this relationship, this uh friendship is feeling a little stagnant." Nicole stuttered and her face was growing redder by the second.

She had used the word relationship. I had always seen us as being in a relationship that couldn't be defined.

I took off my helmet and looked up to her as she stood over my sitting frame.

"Is this a relationship Nicole? Do we need to...spice things up a little?" I asked quietly as I reached a hand up to caress her cheek.

She leaned into my touch and I heard a small sound of pleasure from her in the form of a hum or a slight purr.

"I always kind of thought so. My mind wants you, my body wants you..." she trailed up and her hands made it up to my hair. Running her fingers through it, she sighed and looked at my lips.

"I thought I was giving you enough signs, but you never did anything." She said on a whisper.

I berated myself internally. I had wanted to make a move for so long; to do something so she would understand what I was feeling.

With my hand still on her cheek I pulled her closer to me and I watched as her upper teeth worried her bottom lip.

"What is your heart telling you Nicole?" I asked on a quiet breath.

She audibly swallowed and she blinked once, twice and then she moved closer by just a hair.

"My heart calls your name. In my head, in my sleep. My dreams have changed." She said before I pulled her completely to me and kissed her like both of our lives depended on it.

I felt her hands grip my hair and try to pull me closer to her. My hand left her cheek to wind behind her neck as I deepened the kiss by sweeping my tongue across her bottom lip.

I felt the sweet warmth of her mouth and tongue as she parted her lips to allow me to enter.

That's when I heard the throaty moan escape her that made my already hard cock feel like it was made of steel.

I left her lips to suck in some oxygen and kiss along her jaw.

"Fuck me..." she murmured softly and I wanted to scoop her up and do just that.

That's when it hit me; no matter the decade, this wasn't right. Even if we slept together, and as glorious as it would be, this was the wrong way to go about it.

I pulled away from her gently and saw the lust clouding her eyes. She licked her lips, as if she was trying to capture every bit of my taste that I had left on her.

"Nicole, I think we should slow down." I said and he reyes popped open suddenly.

"I mean, we are on the street making out like teenagers." I added quickly, hoping she wouldn't think the wrong thing.

"You're right, of course." she said with a smile and shake of her head. "Can we go eat and talk about this?"

I nodded and she offered to take our bags and helmets up to her apartment.

I waited for her knowing that we wouldn't leave if I followed and pulled my phone out to look for a place to eat.

Nicole came back out and had a light jacket on.

"How about Thai?" I asked, knowing that while it wasn't her favorite, we didn't eat it often. It would be a nice break from everything else.

"Sure." She smiled and tucked her arm around my waist. I was caught off guard by this affectionate display. We had cuddled on her futon watching television or movies, but we never held each other in public.

I draped my arm across her shoulders and led her in the direction of our dinner.

When we reached the restaurant, both of seemed happy that it was a tiny, hole in the wall type place. We had never ordered from here and it was obscure enough that I especially wouldn't be recognized.

After ordering our drinks and food we sat staring at each other for a few moments.

"Why aren't we talking?" Nicole asked after the waiter had left our drinks. I let out the breath that I hadn't realized I'd been holding and laughed with her.

"Can I ask you a serious question?" She looked at me with a slight scowl on her face.

"Of course. You can always ask me anything." I offered and wanted to take her hand, but I had the feeling she would pull away. I had learned over the last few months that when she wanted to talk about something serious, she needed to be in control of her own space.

"Well...I said you could call me Paige and you never do. I hear my name fall from your lips more often than anyone else. Is there a reason for that?" she asked as she took a sip of her iced tea.

To say I was taken aback would have been an understatement. As much as I had desperately wanted her to be Paige, with all her memories and be able to tell us what had happened in the year she was gone, the woman who stood in front of me that day had offered something she couldn't give me at the time.

She wanted to be Paige for me.

But she wasn't prepared to be her. I wasn't prepared for her to be Paige.

"It's hard to explain." I started and looked down at my hands. I watched with fascination as I saw one of Nicole's hands grasp for mine.

At that moment the waiter had decided to deliver our food. I groaned internally; knowing that he was just doing his job, but seemed to have the worst timing known to man.

We started to eat and I heard Nicole laugh.

"At least it isn't shawarma." She said with a laugh as she slurped up some noodles into her mouth.

I about dropped my fork, "What did you say?"

She looked up at me and shrugged, "At least it isn't shawarma? What's wrong Steve?"

"Paige used to joke all the time about how lucky she was that everything wasn't shawarma. She got tired of it really quickly." I answered her.

She was looking at me confused and a little nervous.

"Oh, that's...strange." I saw her gulp and reach for her drink. She swallowed it down in about two seconds.

"You were going to explain something to me right?" she asked, deftly changing the subject.

"You said I could call you Paige, and a part of me, a huge part wanted to be able to call you by that name. But I got the feeling you were doing it to make me happy." I said as I wiped my mouth and threw down the paper napkin.

"I was touched by that, but I need you to understand something. No matter whom you are; Paige, Nicole, or Cleopatra, I'm simply happy because you're alive." I said as I smiled at her gently.

"Did you love her? I mean, I know you told me that you both kept your distance and that you weren't even friends really, but...did you?" She asked gently. I saw the curiosity in her eyes and knew that no matter what, I could never lie to her.

"I was...at least to some extent." I paused as the waiter came by to collect our plates and refill our cups.

"It was different a year ago, I was different. She reminded me so much of Peggy..." I sighed. Nicole and I had had several long discussions about Peggy Carter. She knew what that meant.

"You do too. But it's different." I looked up to her and she had her head cocked to the side in question.

"At the time, Paige had brought out the worst in me. She had angered me in our only session and I couldn't bring myself to apologize or set things right." I started and ran a hand through my hair.

"I started to watch her from afar, like the stalker I am." I laughed and so did Nicole. "I wanted to try to figure out who she was and then try to be her friend. It was a terrible plan in retrospect. Why didn't I just go to her? Talk to her? Listen?" I shook my head sadly, because I may never know why I had acted that way.

"And yes, maybe I loved her in a way. Because she reminded me of Peggy or because she was strong enough to call me out and not be outwardly bothered by my lack of response...I don't know." I sighed.

"But you don't now, do you?" Nicole asked suddenly. I met her gaze and held it for a moment before I answered.

"No, no I don't." I answered truthfully. "And not because she isn't here, but because you are."

I watched to see the recognition spread across her face. She smiled wide and I knew she understood what I was saying.

I didn't have to say those three little words; they weren't necessary.

"You're here too." Nicole said softly. I reached across the table to squeeze her hand.

"You want to get out of here?" I asked as I pulled my wallet out. She nodded and I went up to the counter to pay.

I felt as if I was being watched and scanned the restaurant quickly, but the only thing I noticed was the bell ringing on the door as someone exited.

I walked back to the table to leave a tip and collect Nicole so we could leave when I felt the same sensation.

The hairs on the back of my neck were standing at full attention, but there was no one else around.

We left quickly and began our walk back to Nicole's apartment.

We were wrapped up in each other again, but I couldn't shake the feeling of being followed or watched.

"I feel it too. Let's get back so we can check out the place." she said quietly and we quickened our pace slightly.

We made it to her building a few minutes later, and I was tempted to tell her to wait in the hall as I swept her apartment for bugs or unwanted visitors, but I knew she would never go for it.

We unlocked the door and noticed that it looked like it hadn't been tampered with.

We both nodded at each other and separated. The floor plan was small enough that we could reach each other quickly if we needed to.

Stark had gifted Nicole a radio equipment analyzer to be able to check for electronic equipment in her apartment. If was a precaution since we still didn't have a clue as to who took her.

She pulled it out and turned it on. It ran through its course and we decided it was safe. She turned it off and stashed it away.

"That was weird. I've never felt that before." She said as we both moved to the futon.

I sat first and pulled her to me and she squealed in delight as she came plopping down on my lap.

"I would do anything to keep you safe." I said seriously as I caressed her cheek, just as I had done earlier on the street.

"I can take care of myself old man." she countered with a smile. I leaned in to kiss her and she offered her lips and mouth to me.

I greedily attacked her mouth and peppered kisses along her jaw and up to her earlobe.

I felt her grip my shoulders and claw at my back.

Tonight wouldn't be sweet and gentle; tonight would be raw and we would feel unhinged.

I went to gather her up to carry her to the bedroom, regardless if we had more things to discuss; this was happening tonight.

Our bodies, minds, and hearts were going to be one.

Just as she grabbed my shirt and deftly ripped it from my chest, my phone rang.

I cringed as I heard the emergency tone I had set specifically for the person that was currently trying to reach me.

Nicole pulled away, knowing this call I would answer no matter what was happening between us.

I pulled the phone out of my pocket and looked at the screen.

_Director Fury._

My mind raced; was this the reason we were so on edge after dinner?

"Yes sir?" I asked quietly, trying to slow down my heartbeat. I swore he could sense that over the phone.

"_I know what you found. You and Stark aren't as sneaky as you think." _He said simply and I couldn't detect any malice in his voice.

"Sir, I-"

"_Save it Cap. I expected more from you. Bring her in tomorrow for a debriefing. I'll be calling all members of the team, although I doubt the thunder god will make it."_

I waited for anything else he might add.

"_Is she alright?" _ He finally asked.

It was not in his nature to be overly concerned or emotionally involved; but his team mattered to him.

"I'll bring all the paperwork and lab results. She doesn't remember anything." I said and at that Nicole turned to look at me with wide eyes.

"_I thought as much. 8 AM Cap. Don't be late."_

The call was disconnected and I looked at Nicole who had moved just far enough away from me to make my heart ache for her presence.

"We knew it couldn't last forever, right?" She offered as she stood and began pacing.

I only nodded. How had Tony and I screwed this up? He had sworn he was being careful and covering his tracks.

"It could be worse...Fury could have shown up here." I said, trying desperately to push down the fear and frustration.

"I think it will be alright though. He'll want to get to the bottom of this. To figure out who took you." I said as I stood to stop her from wearing a groove in the carpet. "It will be fine, I'll protect you."

She let me hug her and I felt her arms wrap around me.

"I know you will...but who's going to protect you?"

_**A/N #2: Ok, I know I left you a not up top...but I want to apologize that this is a cliffhanger or sorts. AND, I apologize for being a huge C.B. That's what yaga called me when she read it...if you want to know what that means...leave a review and I'll tell you!**_


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Ok, so only 1 day over a week and y'all are getting another update! Woohoo! I crack myself up! Big thanks to yagalinus0420 for basically keeping me sane...which is a difficult task! Sorry I was such a cockblocker last chapter! More at the bottom...**

**Paige POV**

I had been awake all night. After the kisses Steve and I had shared on the street and in my living room, I would have given anything to be awake all night with him in my apartment.

I would have preferred to have been naked, hot, and sweaty with Steve; moving my body with his. Looking into his eyes, my hands roaming over his taut muscles and feeling that familiar tightness in the pit of my stomach before we explode together.

The only reason I was sweaty was because my window AC unit decided to stop working and I was currently pacing my living room. I was sure Steve would tell me to stop because I was wearing a groove in the floor, but he was currently asleep in my bed.

I stopped to look through the bedroom door and I could see his sleeping form with the light being cast from the ceiling light in the living room.

The bed sheet had slipped down his chest and was resting just at his hips. I stood for a moment admiring his body and smirked to myself; while he was beautifully built, it was his mind and his heart that attracted me from the very beginning.

He had been so kind; even though a large part of that was because of _whom _I was. But in my mind, that didn't change anything. He stood by me when we went over my blood test, helped me train and prepare because we knew this day was coming.

I glanced at the clock on my stove and decided that at 1:30am was as good of time as any to try to get some sleep.

I contemplated lying down on my futon, but I knew that if Steve woke up before me, he'd be disappointed I hadn't slept in my own bed.

After he got the phone call from Fury we talked about what possibilities would come up today at this meeting.

The one, and most important, was that Fury was going to be pissed. Steve told me that Fury _knew _about me. That fact alone scared the shit out of me.

He knew and he obviously had waited for several members of his Avengers team to clue him in. My worry for Natasha, Clint, Steve, hell, even Stark were founded in reality.

I just had a terrible feeling about all of this. Something was going to be said or done, and I was afraid of becoming a freak show.

What if Fury tried to reprimand them? They were acting in my best interests and theirs, but he should have known as soon as they knew, right?

The questions were never ending as I sat gingerly on the edge of my bed and set my alarm. Five hours of sleep would have to suffice.

I gently picked up the covers and slid underneath. I was as still as I could be, holding my breath to make sure I hadn't woken Steve.

We had talked for several hours after that phone call. Steve was trying to drill it into me that I wasn't to blame and that perhaps with Fury on our side we could get to the bottom of my initial disappearance...and find out who was responsible.

After a few moments I let myself relax and as I rolled onto my side I felt Steve shift on the mattress and wrap his arm around my waist.

"Wearing a groove in the floor again?" He asked his voice laced with sleep.

"I thought you were asleep?" I answered. It didn't surprise me though; Steve seemed to know what I was doing even when I thought he wasn't paying attention.

"How could I sleep in your bed alone?" He asked as his nose nuzzled my neck. I sighed contentedly. I felt safe, protected, loved.

"Well, we need to get some sleep so we don't look like zombies for this meeting." I said quietly.

Sleep was the furthest thing from my mind at this point, what with Steve nipping and kissing at my neck and ear.

His hand ghosted down my side and came to rest on my bare thigh. I had seriously contemplated wearing pajama pants to sleep in, but I found them ridiculously uncomfortable and always felt like I was tangled in them. My tank top and underwear would suffice.

"That's a little hard to do knowing your half naked beside me in this bed." Steve said and I heard the lust rolling off his tongue.

I rolled to my other side and he moved to lie on his back. I rested my head on his chest and he wrapped both of his arms around me.

I looked up and kissed his chin. I could just make out the outline of his face and couldn't help but notice how peaceful he looked, even in the darkness.

Steve shifted again so he was hovering over me. He raised his hand to caress my cheek and I leaned into his touch.

"You are so amazing Nicole." He whispered in the dark. "You're so strong; taking all of this in stride, even when you had your doubts and concerns in the beginning."

I shrugged, "You've been by my side this whole time. Thank you, Steve." I smiled and lifted my head enough to touch my lips to his.

I felt him sink down onto his elbows as he deepened the kiss; his teeth nipping at my bottom lip and darting his tongue into my mouth. My hands moved across his bare back and up to his hair.

Steve tore his lips from mine and kissed along my jaw and down my throat. I shivered at his touch and felt my body explode with goose bumps.

I felt him skim his nose along my collarbone and swept his tongue out to lap at the hollow in my neck.

Steve continued his travels, using his lips, teeth and tongue to pick out a path down my torso. I felt his fingers brush against my breasts and my nipples pebbled immediately at his light touch.

"Nicole, tell me if we're moving too fast..." Steve said as he blazed a trail of kisses down my covered stomach onto the tops of my thighs.

I could only nod into the stillness of the room. I somehow knew that I wasn't a virgin, but I couldn't remember the last time I had been touched like this.

"Steve?" He was reaching for the waistband of my underwear and removed his hands immediately.

"I'm sorry." He said softly, but made no move to come and lay next to me again.

"No, it's ok. I just...I just don't remember the last time I did something like this." I said finally.

I heard him sigh, "We can stop if you're uncomfortable." He started to move back up and I put my hands on his shoulders to stop him.

"I'm not saying that at all." I whispered. He grinned and I saw him lick his lips.

"I'll be gentle, I promise." He said as he resumed his previous position. I settled back and willed myself to relax.

Steve fingers tentatively reached for my waistband again and I bucked my hips slightly to let him know that it was alright. He snaked his fingers underneath it and pulled them down slowly. I lifted my hips again to help him ease my panties down my legs. I heard the soft sound of them falling to the floor as Steve spread my legs wide and settled him between my thighs.

I could hear his heavy breathing and I wondered if he was feeling as nervous as I was.

"You are so fucking beautiful." Steve whispered as he caressed my wet fold with the tip of one of his fingers.

My hips bucked seemingly on their own and he laughed lightly.

"Just let me tease you for a moment." He said before he made a long, slow swipe of his tongue from the bottom of my slit to my clit.

"Oh my god!" I shuddered and I felt Steve chuckle.

"Save the praise for later baby. I'm not even close to being done with you." He said as he flicked my clit with his tongue.

The feeling of his warm tongue over my protruding bud was almost too much for me to bear. My hands found their way to his hair once again and my fingers held on for dear life.

I felt him move one finger down to my core and he continued to lick, nip, and suck my clit. When he entered my most vulnerable spot, I felt my body clench around him.

"Please don't stop." I panted as he picked up his pace from languid to racing. The combined movements of his finger, then _fingers, _pumping in and out of my wet pussy and his lips and tongue on my clit, were bringing me dangerously close to that glorious edge.

I could feel my belly clench and I knew it wouldn't be long before the explosion hit me.

"Steve, I'm so close...please." I wasn't above begging at this point.

He lifted his head and I felt his other hand grip my hip. His thumb brushed over my clit as his fingers continued to slam into me without any sign of stopping. He moved up enough to kiss me, and I tasted myself on his lips and tongue.

"Let go, Nicole. I want to see your face when I make you cum." He said huskily before kissing me again.

I whimpered against his lips and he pulled back immediately. I could see his clouded eyes watching me intently and he continued to fuck me with his fingers.

Suddenly and without much warning, I fell over the edge and saw stars.

"Oh fuck! Steve!" I screamed as I came over his hand and he crashed his lips to mine to perfect the moment.

I vaguely felt him slowing and removing his fingers from me but he kept rubbing my clit, coaxing one more orgasm from me.

"That has got to be my new favorite thing. Give me one more Nicole, can you?" he teased as he deftly moved back down to my nub and attacked it with his tongue.

I felt his lips wrap around it just as I was coming back up to the peak. When he sucked it into his mouth, I was done for. Calling his name and clawing at his back and shoulders. My back arching off the mattress, as my body went wild for him.

He slowed and pulled me back down to earth and chuckled softly.

"Thank you." He said simply as he sucked his fingers clean and then kissed me deeply. I giggled into his mouth and he pulled away to look at me.

"Shouldn't I be thanking you?" I asked with a smile. He grinned and moved himself to lie next to me again.

He wrapped his arms around me and even in the darkness it wasn't difficult to see his erection tenting in his sweatpants.

He pulled me so I was resting against his chest again.

"I could live a very happy life if I got to see the look on your face every day." He said simply and I smiled to myself.

My hand was rubbing circles on his chest and I gradually moved it lower until I had reached the drawstring. I felt his sharp intake of breath and I hesitated thinking he would want to stop me. When he said nothing I continued moving until my hand was wrapped around his cloth covered cock.

"Lift your hips." I commanded quietly and Steve obliged. I gripped the pants and pulled them down to his ankles where he used his feet to kick them off.

I hovered at his side for moment just looking at the hard member before me. In my mind I knew I had a penis before, and while I certainly didn't think they were beautiful by any means, I had to give credit to the universe for the one currently residing in my bed.

I swung a leg over Steve's body to straddle him as I peppered kisses across his chest. Somehow, instinct was taking over and I felt empowered as I heard him whimper softly and my wet core slid across the tip of his cock. I knelt between his legs, mimicking his earlier position and lightly scraped my nails down his shaft.

"Nicole." He warned me with a hiss, and I decided not to waste anymore time. I flicked my tongue out and tasted the wetness that had gathered at the head and being spurned on by his incoherent mumbling, sank my mouth down and took him into my mouth.

I took a moment to breath and adjust to the length and thickness and slowly moved back up. As I reached the tip Steve bucked his hips and I moved my mouth down faster.

I reached out to cup his balls in one hand, while my other moved to grasp the shaft. I rolled his tight balls between my fingers and began to suck the tip as my hand pumped up and down his length.

"Nicole, I'm not going to last baby." Steve murmured as I continued my movements. His fingers were woven into my short hair and he lightly pressed on my head to take him deeper into my mouth.

I moved faster and sucked harder while continuing to play with his balls. I felt the muscles in his abdomen tighten and I knew it was a matter of seconds before I made him mine.

"Ugh, fuck!" Steve yelled as I felt the first shot of his hot cum hit the back of throat. I was taken by surprise by that and my motions faltered for a split second. He moved his hands to pull me off of him as he continued to erupt into my warm mouth.

I fought against him and continued to suck him down. I wasn't put off by swallowing him and I reveled in the fact that I heard a string of curse words and praises to whatever deity he could think of escape his lips.

I felt him twitch between my lips, but felt no more come out of him. I slowed my movements and released him slowly and softly. I licked my lips and saw his staring at me with wide eyes.

A smile was playing on his lips as he reached down and pulled me up and settled me into his side.

"You're amazing, Nicole." Steve told me as he brushed a kiss across my forehead. I smiled and snuggled in closer to him and draped an arm across his abs.

I heard his breathing even out and felt his body go slightly limp and heavy as sleep took him over.

I rested peacefully against his strong body and reveled in the knowledge that I had turned Captain America into an incoherent mess with only my tongue.

"Nicole, wake up baby. We have to get going soon." Steve said as he shook me gently. I shook my head into my pillow and groaned as he placed a smacking kiss on my cheek.

"We're going to be late." He said as I slowly opened my eyes. I saw him smile at me and walk out the bedroom.

He was already dressed and I could feel the humidity coming from the bathroom telling me he had already taken a shower.

I jumped up quickly and ran to the bathroom to shower. I was changing when he came back into the bedroom.

I was standing in my underwear and bra staring into my closet trying to decide what to wear.

"Nice look, but I don't think Fury will like it." Steve said with a smile as his eyes roamed over my body.

"Ha ha ha! Seriously though! What should I wear?" I asked exasperated. "This is a big deal, Steve."

"I know baby." he kissed the top of my head as he gathered me in his arms. "Just wear something comfortable."

I shrugged and went to my dresser to pull out a pair of yoga pants. I tugged them on and went to my closet to grab a simple white t-shirt.

"Nicole...you need to be prepared for anything." Steve told me nervously. "I'll be bringing all the lab results from Stark, but Fury may want to run his own tests."

I nodded as I pulled on some socks and grabbed my running shoes.

"Will you be able to be there with me? The whole time?" I asked quietly as I laced up my shoes.

"I won't leave you...no matter what." Steve said as he grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the bedroom.

I grabbed my keys and my wallet and handed them to Steve. After he locked the door we headed down to the street and immediately got on Steve's bike and headed for the docks.

A surprisingly easy 30 minute drive later and Steve and I dismounted the bike in front of what appeared to be a naval carrier.

What I really noticed when I took the helmet off was Natasha, Clint, Stark, and even Pepper waiting for us.

"Looks like we're busted, eh Cap?" Stark called out as we made our way over them.

I smiled at them all, but suddenly felt as if all my words should be saved for the meeting, when I was sure I would need to defend myself.

Steve placed a hand on the small of my back and guided me up the gang plank and into the first round of security.

I went through a metal detector and waited as everyone followed. We made our way through the halls and it felt slightly odd to me.

It was somewhat familiar, but Steve and I had discussed that possibility. What was really odd was that Steve and I were leading, with the other four flanking us.

I saw stares from many people as we passed and when we reached the final security check point I started to feel like I was going to puke.

We walked into a large conference room that had large glass floor to ceiling windows instead of walls. I saw a bald man in a black trench coat standing on the opposite side of the room from where we entered.

"Dr. Smith, what a surprise." The bald man said to me confidently. "I'm pleased to see you alive." He took a seat at that end of the table and everyone else began to take their seats.

Steve leaned down to whisper in my ear, something reassuring I suppose, but I was distracted by someone pushing past me to get into the room.

Steve wrapped an arm around me and gave me a concerned look, while my attention drifted to the man that had just entered.

"Am I late?" He asked as he removed his glasses and polished them with the hem of his shirt. "What's so important anyway?"

His eyes finally settled on me and I gasped quietly.

I knew this man...I had seen him somewhere before.

His eyes went wide and I noticed something odd about them' while they were brown I noticed that around the iris's they were an unnatural shade of green...and it looked like they were glowing.

"Paige?" He asked and I shrunk slightly into Steve's embrace.

"STOP TOUCHING HER!" He screamed at Steve who started to push me behind him and out of the way.

I saw Natasha and Clint start to rise out of their chairs when I heard a sound like fabric ripping.

I chanced a peek from around Steve and saw this man visibly shaking.

I stepped out and as soon as I moved his eyes darted to me.

They were filled with rage and I couldn't understand what I had possibly done to elicit this reaction from him.

That was when I heard the low rumble emanate from his gut.

"MINE!"

That was when I knew where I had seen these eyes before; a year ago in a dirty alley...and 6 months before that in the darkness of a hotel bar and then later in the privacy of room.

Everything came rushing back to me and I felt faint.

I tried to grasp onto Steve but we were both too late to stop me from falling to floor.

**A/N: How many of you hate me for ending it there? I'm kinda mad at myself for that too...OK, cliffie and short...I'm sorry! I can say that the next chapter should be a doozy! **

**If you are so inclined to see how insane I am, come over and check out my new blog :aushapashafanfiction . blogspot . com You know to take out all the extra spaces! I'm thinking by the time this chapter posts, there *should* be a new post there. I haven't decided yet to post teasers...but we'll see! In other fanfiction news for me, I am currently getting back to my other story, set in the Twilight fandom: The Walk...if you don't hate the stories, come by and give it a look see! **

**I'm also starting a collab fic with my friend and beta, yagalinus0420! We've got 2 1/2 chapters done and would like to have at least 5 before we post! I'll be sure to let everyone know! **

**Other non-related news...My husband retires from the US Navy in 59 days...and I have no idea what to do to celebrate...thoughts? Medically, things are looking better! **

**Leave me some love on this story and we can discuss how the shit is going down!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Soooo...here's an update? I know its been a bit, but I am working on another story that was started back '09, but here's this! Things are starting to get intense...I would love to hear what you all have to say or are thinking about this...Much love once again to yagalinus0420...she's my beta, my friend...and you should be mad at her for this! More at the bottom!**

**Paige POV**

_Sitting in my room and thinking about all the possibilities that the procedure tomorrow would hold and I hadn't even realized that someone had entered my personal space. _

"_What are you doing hiding in here?" Lorraine asked me as she stood staring at me with her arms crossed over her chest. _

"_I'm not hiding, I'm thinking." I responded quietly. I didn't look up to her but I felt her move to sit next to me on my bed. _

"_What are you thinking about now?" She asked as she leaned back against the wall. _

"_Lorraine, I know it took some time, but I agree with what we're doing here, but..." I trailed off and my mind wandered to my former life. _

"_You miss them don't you?" she asked surprised. I looked over at her finally and rolled my eyes._

"_You seem surprised. I spent over two years of my life with them." I said pointedly. She just shrugged and turned her direction away from me._

"_It's just so strange that we never heard of them looking for me. I mean, it's not like this facility is really hiding under the radar or something." I sighed, "I just thought that...that maybe one of them would have found out where I was." I finally spit it out. _

_My mind wandered to Captain America as it often did when I was feeling like this. He would have been the ideal person to speak to while I was going through this metamorphosis. _

"_Would you have let him take you if he found out where you were?" Lorraine asked me quietly. _

_I knew who she meant; we had talked about Steve numerous times before. How I had always felt drawn to him and how I felt that if all the puzzle pieces would fall into place, that maybe I could make him happy._

"_No, I wouldn't have. But that's not really the point though." I said as I stood to pace the room. _

"_I don't know why you don't talk to Dr. Banner. He's been injected with the serum, and even if it didn't go as planned, Paige, he has personal experience with it." Lorraine said as she stood and moved back to the door. _

_I stopped abruptly in my tracks. Not Bruce Banner..._

"_There's something about him I don't trust, Lorraine." I explained for the umpteenth time. _

"_It doesn't matter to me if he's in charge here or that he has never done anything to me personally...I just don't trust him." I said feeling defeated. _

_Lorraine stared at me for a moment before I resumed my pacing and she left. _

_I moved back to my bed and sat restlessly, my knee bobbing up and down in a frantic rhythm. I chewed on my thumb nail. _

_Truth was I was feeling paranoid; if any members of The Avengers had found me, I would have left with them without a second's hesitation. _

_My brain was fuzzy and I had suspected for some time that I was being manipulated. I stood and resumed my pacing; trying to recall anything that would be important later on, when there was a knock at my door. _

_I froze and watched the handle turn. I saw a head of moppy, dark brown hair pop through the small opening. _

"_Paige? I was wondering if we could talk before the procedure tomorrow." Dr. Banner said as he smiled at me. I nodded fearing my own voice. _

"Nicole! Nicole, are you ok baby?" I could hear Steve yelling at me, but something told me to keep my eyes closed and play opossum for the time being.

I felt him cradle my limp body in his arms as Fury told Agent Hill to get a medic. I could hear murmurs and scuffling.

I listened intently and heard Natasha and Clint convincing Bruce to wait in the holding room. That triggered a memory in me, but I couldn't remember what it meant.

Steve was still hovering over me, but I was confused. He wasn't calling me Paige.

I heard someone enter the room and tell Steve to back off so he could look me over. I'm not sure how I did it, but when he shined a penlight over my eyes, I did my best not to react. It obviously worked well enough.

"She's unconscious. Did she hit her head?" I heard the medic ask.

"I caught her just before she hit the floor." I heard Steve answer quickly. In my mind I could see his blue eyes clouded with worry, and I wanted nothing more than to open my eyes and kiss his concern away.

Wait...not kiss him, reassure him...but why would I want to kiss him?

My head was swimming and I was feeling incredibly confused.

"Take her to the medical quarters and put her under observation." I heard Director Fury order.

"Please, can we put her in a private room?" Steve pleaded. "She'll be scared if she wakes up there."

I didn't hear an answer but I felt Steve lift my body up in his powerful arms and begin to walk. All along the way I heard Pepper mumbling to Tony about how worried she was. I never heard a peep out of Stark.

We came to a stop and Steve whispered to me, "I promised nothing would happen to you. I'm keeping that promise."

We moved into a room that was unearthly quiet.

I couldn't hear the hum from any computers or electronic equipment. Even with my eyes closed I could sense the room was small.

I felt Steve lay me down on something soft and I assumed it was a bed of some sort.

"Why here?" I heard Pepper ask.

"All of Paige's things are here. She'll probably feel more comfortable." Tony answered and I knew where I was.

My personal quarters; my home aboard the Helicarrier.

"Captain Rogers, you and Mr. Stark come with me." I heard Director Fury's voice again.

"I'm not leaving her alone." I heard Steve say from next to me as he gripped my hand.

"It's not a request Captain." Fury said and I heard the distinct sound of the doors opening and closing as he left.

"Steve, I'll go to her apartment and get some of her belongings." Pepper said quietly.

I didn't hear Steve respond, but I felt his fingers brush my hair away from my forehead.

"I love you Nicole." He whispered softly, "I'll protect you."

My heart swelled at his simple, soft admission but I was confused about why he would say that to me.

I felt the mattress shift as he removed his weight from next to me.

I had the feeling that someone was up close to me and staring. I remained as still as possible.

"What did he do to you? Hmm?" Tony Stark asked me quietly before he sighed.

"Tony, let's go." Steve urged. "The sooner we're done, the sooner I can get back."

Again, I heard the distinct sound of the doors opening for the three of them to leave and then close again.

I waited, breathing evenly and not moving. I wasn't sure if anyone else was in the room, but if there was it would only be a matter of time before they made some noise.

When I felt a significant amount of time had passed, with only me making any noise, I sat up slowly from the bed.

I took in my surroundings and immediately felt comforted. _This _was my room on the Helicarrier...I remembered it.

I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and stood up to take a look around. It seemed that every surface was covered in a thin coating of dust.

I moved to my desk and saw that my laptop was sitting where I usually kept it; files were still on the table tucked into their folders.

As I looked around, I got the feeling that while most things hadn't been disturbed in some time, _someone _had been in here recently.

I sat in the desk chair and slowly looked around at everything. The shelf above my desk that held a few precious pictures and knick knacks. The bed and side table that I had just been laying by. I could even see into the bathroom. I couldn't remember how I had left everything, but I knew something was out of place.

My gaze traveled to the door. When should I leave? Should I just go out and into the corridor and make my presence known?

That's when my gaze met with a side table that was fuzzy in my memory at best. I walked to it and found that it was tall enough to hit my hip.

It was a beautiful cherry stained wood, but otherwise very plain and simple. It had no drawers in it and the tabletop itself did not lift up. I took a few steps back feeling lost. It was familiar...but not.

That's when I saw it; something hanging down from underneath it. I dropped to my knees to find a small envelope taped to the underside. At one point all four sides had been taped up, but over time the tape had become loose on two sides and it hung down slightly.

I stepped back and looked at the table again. It wasn't very noticeable; in fact, if I hadn't been studying everything so closely, I doubt I would have seen it.

I went back and snatched it from the table, peeling the tape away.

The front of the envelope had one name written on it: SMITH.

I turned it over quickly to find that it was still perfectly sealed. I stared at the envelope for several minutes before finally opening it.

When I started to read what was there on that page before me, I almost screamed.

_Paige, _

_Do you remember what I made you promise me? That if something should ever happen to me and your questions weren't answered, that you would wait to hear something from me? _

_Well, here I am reaching out to you. Although at this point, with your disappearance who knows if you'll ever get this. _

_The battle of New York was a turning point for The Avenger's Initiative. Without going into too much detail...my death was a necessity. _

_Everything that happened wasn't planned, but we needed a way to bring them together to fight for the bigger picture. _

_I wish that I had been able to tell you what was happening, but it all came about so quickly. _

_Paige, I can't tell you how worried I am for you. I have information for you and the team, but it's sensitive and not everyone can be trusted. _

_Knowing you as well as I think I do, I can tell you this...whatever you thought about Bruce is true. I know somewhere deep down you'll understand this. Be careful around him. _

_I have been keeping tabs on you and hope that you are the one reading this. It means that you've come back to the team; they need you. _

_You are the missing puzzle piece. That's all I can say at this point, until we are face to face. _

_I left a small trail, not big enough for anyone except Stark to find. _

_Find me. Bring the one you can trust and leave the others behind; things are in the works that need to be stopped. _

_I apologize that this sounds so cryptic; but in case this gets into the wrong hands, well it's just safer this way. _

_SHIELD recruited you because of what your parents set into motion all those years ago. _

_That's all I can tell you now. _

_Paige, I hope you are alive and well, and I hope that this letter from me doesn't cause you any additional pain or anguish. I promise when you find me you can yell at me all you want. _

_I'll be looking for you. _

_Phil_

I sat and read the letter over and over. Phil was alive! Well, at least when he wrote this letter. Fury and he had used his death as a catalyst.

I knew that's how the team saw it, but to learn from Phil that they used the opportunity as an advantage...I wasn't surprised.

Phil had never been shy about his faith in the Avengers team. I had always been proud of him for that.

His letter confused me though; he wrote about my disappearance.

I could tell by looking around this room that I had been gone for some time, but I couldn't remember where I was.

I needed to talk to Fury. I folded the letter and slipped it back into the envelope and stood up. Phil told me to trust my gut and only share this with the people I trusted.

I wasn't sure that Fury was one of those people.

I went to the door and pressed the panel to open it. Before I could step out into the corridor I was met by two nameless guards.

"Dr. Smith, Director Fury has ordered you to stay in your quarters until further instruction." Guard number 1 told me as he and his sidekick tried to force me back into my room.

"I'm going to see Fury. Move out of my way!" I said forcefully. The guards didn't respond and continued to push me backwards into the room.

"You can't keep me here!" I shouted as guard number 2 started to pull my left arm behind my back to move me into a submissive position.

I knew I had to get in control of this situation, but I would be damned if anyone manhandled me.

I used the momentum of the guard shoving me into the room and spun out with my left wrist grasped in his hand. With two arms length between us he started to pull me roughly back to him.

I used the movement to swing my right fist out and land a right hook on his jaw. His head snapped back and his grip loosened enough that my left arm was free. Guard number 1 started to charge me and I ducked quickly to flip him over my shoulder, his forward momentum to send him easily over my shoulder.

Guard 2 was staggering in front of me while guard 1 was moaning on the floor behind me. #2 put his hand up in a boxing stance and threw several punches that I deftly avoided.

I started to circle him and I was struck with the faint memory of doing this with Natasha. I moved around him and as he tried to follow I launched myself into the air low enough to avoid the ground but forcefully enough to land my foot in the crook of his right knee. He toppled easily and I landed on my knees on his back.

I grabbed a handful of his hair and pulled his head back, just to slam it into the floor. His body went slack underneath mine and I turned my attention to #1.

He had picked himself up off the floor and was looking at the scene that lay between me and his unconscious counterpart.

"What is your deal?" He asked, fear lacing in his words.

I was confused for a split second, but it was long enough for him to try to charge me. He landed a punch into my side, and it knocked the wind out of me. I clutched at my side and tried to catch my breath.

I looked up and he was hovering over me. He easily had 6 inches over me. His fists were balled in front of his chest and his nostrils were flaring as he sucked in air.

"Please...I'm so sorry..." I trailed off and he started to lower his arms when I threw my right fist up and hit directly under his jaw. As his head came back down, I threw out my right elbow effectively breaking his nose and he fell to the floor. I stood gasping for air and looking at the two men lying at my feet.

I checked their pulses and found they were both very much alive. My heart was racing, and I wondered where I had learned enough to defend myself. I shook away the haze in my mind and made my way out of the door and into the corridor.

The hallway was empty and I made my way to Fury's office. I had heard Fury tell Steve and Tony to go with him and I knew they would be in his office. I kept my head down as much as I could and made my way to Fury's office without incident.

I vaguely remembered that Fury had cameras outside his office but that didn't stop me as I pounded on the door.

The door was wrenched open in front of me and there stood Director Fury.

"I see you found your way just fine." Fury said confidently as he stood in front of me.

"You put me on watch?! How dare you?" I shouted as I shoved past Fury and into the office.

I saw Stark turn in the chair he was sitting in and look at me curiously. Steve was on his feet and moving towards me. The adrenaline was still coursing through my body, but when Steve met me, as I was halfway into the room, I was grateful for his hold on me and my body sagged against his.

I clutched his shirt in my fist and looked up at him. He had one arm wrapped around my waist and was smoothing the hair away from my face with his free hand.

"Oh Nicole, are you alright baby?" He cooed worriedly at me. I nodded slightly, ignoring the use of my middle name, and reveled in the intimate embrace we were in.

"What happened to me?" I asked. Steve sighed and pulled me closer to him.

"Nicole, how did you get past the guards?" I heard Stark ask me from his spot in the chair.

"They're both unconscious on the floor in my quarters. They're alive, but they'll need medical attention." I said simply.

_Why were they calling me by my middle name? Because that's your name!_

My head was swimming with confusion and questions. Steve laid a kiss on the top of my head and I had flashbacks to the night before; hands roaming over slick, naked skin. Moans and screams of ecstasy. Visions of coming undone with his mouth on me; of me bringing him over the edge with his hands in my hair.

But Steve was my patient...at least at one time he was. _But things are different now. YOU are different. _

My head was giving me conflicting information. Steve and I were closer now. We had just met three months ago...no, we met more than two years ago.

I shook my head and pulled away from Steve.

"What the fuck is going on?!" I screamed as I ran a hand through my hair and stopped abruptly when I realized it was no longer hanging long down my back, but was cropped short.

"What happened to me?" I asked softly. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

"We're hoping you can tell us that." Stark said as he rose and came to where I was standing. I had moved a few feet away from Steve and took another step backwards as Tony approached.

"Maybe we should start at the beginning..." Steve trailed off. He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked down at the floor.

"I don't care where we start, but somebody better start talking!" I said as I began pacing. "My room looks like it hasn't been touched in ages, I took out two guards and I have no clue how I knew how to do it." I sighed.

Phil's letter was like a lead weight hidden in my waistband. The three men stared at me, and I could have sworn I saw Steve wiping at his eyes.

"What. Happened."

Stark led me to the chair he had vacated and I sat down with a thud.

"You disappeared over a year ago...Nicole." Fury started. But I held up a hand to cut him off.

"My name is Paige."

**A/N: yaggy told me to make it a cliffy! Sorry! If you guys review, you'll get another update later this week! I promise...its already halfway written. Leave me some love folks...I know you want to!**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Aren't you all a bunch of lucky ducks? I got one review...ONE for the last update...and I still decided to give you another one this week. Sheesh...spolied...:) Thanks to yagalinus0420...there's another short note at the bottom...PLEASE read it! There will be a quiz!**

**Cap POV**

"My name is Paige."

With that simple statement my heart broke.

I should have been excited! Paige was back it seemed, but she still seemed so confused. She let me comfort her for a moment before she pushed away from me.

Was it possible that Nicole was really gone?

"I don't understand...I know who I am. Paige Smith, criminal psychologist. I've been working with SHIELD for three years. But...that doesn't seem right. I have a job doing...I'm a waitress." Paige rambled.

"FUCK!"

All eyes heads turned towards where I stood behind the chairs that were occupied by Paige and Tony.

"Mr. Rogers, calm down." Paige said forcefully.

"Baby, if I could...I would." I answered her, my fists clenched in my pockets.

"Steve," she said as she reached a hand out towards me. I pulled a hand out of my pocket and grasped hers. "Please help me figure this out?"

She looked at me and all I could see was the woman she had been for the past few months. The woman that was confused and trying to come to grips with her former life; a life she couldn't remember.

She looked at our hands with our fingers entwined and smiled sadly.

"This feels right, but I'm not sure why." She said softly.

"Dr. Smith." Fury cleared his throat and she turned to look at him.

"You went missing one year ago. After looking over the lab results provided by Mr. Stark, it seems that you have been injected with the super soldier serum. The results also indicate that you were exposed to vita-rays. This is a technology that has been deemed outdated and SHIELD has no record of anyone having the equipment to build the machine needed to produce enough power to set off the effects of the serum."

Fury stood and moved to his windows. Tony was leaning over, his arms resting on his knees.

"Director, I remember you telling me that you wanted me to come back in and do some lab work." Paige said quietly.

"Yes, the day before you went missing I asked for you to come in and redo your blood panel. We had discovered that you had a diluted strain of the serum in you." He answered before moving back to the desk.

"Paige, we need to figure out how you became injected that first time and we need to find out where you've been for the last year."

It was silent in the room. I could hear my ragged breathing and the thump of Paige's heart.

"I don't remember being gone." She said finally.

"Paige," Tony spoke up. "When Steve found you, you had no recollection of him, or SHIELD. We learned from you that you had been in an accident and placed in a coma."

Paige withdrew her hand from mine and turned her body to look at Tony.

"That's absurd. I've never been in an accident in my life." She huffed, her voice laced with exasperation.

"Dr. Smith, I'd like to run my own lab tests. Go down to medical and they'll take care of it. I would also prefer if you stayed in your quarters here on the carrier." Fury ordered.

"No, I want to go home." Paige said defiantly.

"Dr. Smith, I'm advising you that going out into the city will not turn out well." Fury shot back.

"Director Fury, with all due respect, how do I know that SHIELD isn't behind all of this? How do I know that you didn't order me to be injected with the serum?" Paige stood and resumed her pacing.

It brought a small smile to my face to see that no matter whom she was Paige or Nicole, pacing was universal to her.

"Sir, I'd be happy to accompany her back to her apartment. I'll make sure nothing happens." I offered.

Fury seemed to consider this for a moment.

"In the interest of making you more comfortable, I'll allow it. However, I expect that if you should remember anything, I will be the first to hear about it." Fury said as he took his seat.

"Thank you sir." I touched Paige on the shoulder. "Let's go."

She stood and took one more look at Fury and Stark before turning and walking with me to the door.

My hand was on the handle when she turned around to look at the two men.

"Where's Bruce?" She asked.

"I want to go on record as saying that I think this is a horrible idea." I said as we rode the elevator down to the holding cell.

Paige rolled her eyes at me. "Steve, I remember seeing him this morning and then I fainted. I need to speak to him. And I need to do it alone." She said just as the doors opened.

"Nicole um, Paige...UGH! Whatever, I don't think that's a good idea." I pleaded with her.

"Cap, I'll be fine. Just wait back here for me, please?" She looked up at me with her deep brown eyes.

I couldn't stop myself in time. I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers.

I felt her stiffen, but relax almost immediately. Our lips moved together and I felt her arms grip my shoulders.

I pulled back just as quickly as I kissed her and her eyes shot open and stared into mine.

"I promise we can talk about why that felt so right later." She said. I nodded and let her go. I stepped out of the elevator and leaned against the wall.

I couldn't see where she was, but I could hear her.

"Hello Bruce." She said quietly.

"Dr. Smith. To what do I owe this pleasure?" I heard Bruce ask, his voice slightly muffled behind the Kevlar plastic walls.

"What happened Bruce? I don't remember anything...but you seem to have an effect on me." She stated and I began to worry about his reply.

"I have no idea what you mean." He answered dismissively.

"Damnit Bruce!" Paige yelled and I swore the walls rattled. "You freaked out when you saw me walk in the room this morning! I'm getting flashes of you screaming at me in a dark alley."

I heard her sigh and I imagined that she was pacing.

"What do you know? Please Bruce, help me." She was begging him now.

I heard him begin to laugh bitterly, "I never would have wished this life on anyone. Imagine my surprise to find out that you had already been exposed as a child."

My ears perked up. _Exposed to what? _My mind was racing.

"What were you searching for before you were taken Paige? Can you remember?" He was taunting her now.

"I'm not sure what you're talking about. What was I exposed to Bruce? Tell me!" She was shouting again.

"I'm in too deep Paige. Find what you were searching for. That's where you'll find the answers. That's where you'll find my salvation." Bruce said.

"What do you mean you're in too deep? Your salvation?" Paige was screaming now. "If you had something to do with this Bruce, I will kill you! Do you hear me? I will kill you!"

"I WOULD GLADLY WELCOME IT IF YOU COULD!" He bellowed.

At that I ran over to where the holding cell was and grabbed Paige.

"Oh look, your knight in shining armor is here to save the day!" He laughed as I brought Paige's body against mine and started to drag her away.

"You leave him out of this! I love him!" She screamed as she tried to get away from my grasp.

I stopped moving and Bruce just stared at us. His smirked left his face.

"Then kill me when you find your answers." Bruce said as he walked to very back of the cell and slumped down to the floor.

"Paige, let's go." I said softly. She looked at me with tears in her eyes before looking back to Bruce's form on the floor.

"Bruce, please?" She begged of him again, but he gave no response.

I moved with her towards the lift and once we stepped inside she never left my arms. There was no speaking between us and Paige never cried.

We made our way quietly off the Helicarrier and down to where my bike was parked. She took the helmet I offered her silently and climbed on behind me.

I drove us around the city mostly because I wasn't sure where to go. She had said she wanted to go home, but would she really want to be there if I took her there.

We were sitting at a light on Grove Street when Paige pointed to the cafe where I had literally run into her 3 months ago. I nodded and when the light turned green I headed straight for the cafe.

I parked about halfway down the block and after we stowed our helmets, we began walking to the building.

"Steve, can I ask you a question?" Paige asked suddenly before we made it to the door to the cafe.

"Of course. You can ask me anything." I said seriously.

"What's going on between us?" She waved her hand back and forth between our bodies. "I told Bruce I loved you...do I love you?"

"If you do...well, today is the first I'm hearing about it." I answered honestly. I felt what was left of my heart falling apart. How much more could I take?

"Let's move inside and I'll tell you everything I know." I offered as we moved inside.

We stood at the counter and ordered half sandwiches and bowls of soup. We chose a table in the back where no one else seemed to want to be.

I was shredding a paper napkin when Paige laid her hands over mine.

"Just tell me Steve. I can take it." She said, her eyes pleading with me.

"Why did you point to this place?" I asked as a waitress brought out our meals to our table.

"It seemed familiar to me." She said with a shrug.

"This is where I found you Paige. 3 months ago we literally ran into each other at the door." I said as I stirred my soup.

"I was so excited to see you; it had been a year and we were thinking the worst." I explained.

"I remember talking to you late the night that we all went out. You came to my hotel." She said as she picked up her sandwich.

"What did we talk about?" She asked before she took a huge bite.

I told her about what she told me about her interaction with Bruce that night and she frowned.

I told her about how I wanted to go and hunt him down that night, and how I was beyond distraught when I found out she was gone.

I even let my thoughts vomit out of my mouth and told of how I felt about her before she was gone.

When I felt like I had spoken for hours, she asked me the next big question.

"Why were you calling me Nicole?"

I told her about her ID, her life where she was Nicole Smith. I told her the story of her being in the accident and waking up from the coma.

I told her everything that Nicole had ever shared with me.

I told her about her dreams. Dreams of being strapped to a table where she couldn't move and just when she thought all hope was lost; I came crashing in to save her.

"You never came to my rescue, Steve." She said sadly, "Did you even try to find me?"

That's when I hit my ultimate breaking point and broke down in tears.

"We searched for you for so long," I explained between sobs. "There was never any trail, no ransom, nothing."

"I continued searching on my own until Fury called me into his office one day and told me I had to let you go." The gut wrenching sobs wracked through my body.

"Shh, Steve calm down. It's alright." She said as she soothingly rubbed my arm trying to comfort me from across the table.

"It's not ok Paige!" I said. "We had a memorial for you!"

"Steve, did you think I was dead?" She asked, but I couldn't respond. "Steve it's natural when dealing with the loss of someone that you need to find closure."

I sucked in a breath, "I never gave up on you." I said as she wiped my tears away.

"That's all that matters to me." she said as she flashed me smile.

I calmed down slightly and after blowing my nose, she started in on her next line of questioning.

"Steve, what's going on between us?" She asked shyly.

"Do you remember when we first met?" I asked, hoping she would remember trying to comfort me when Phil first brought her into our ranks.

"I told you that I would be there if you ever wanted to talk." She whispered as she looked down at her hands.

"That meant more to me than you can possibly imagine. You seemed to be the only person that opened up to me without wanting something in return." I said as I reached across the table and lifted her chin up with my fingers.

"That's when I knew how special you were."

She blushed and then I saw a look of confusion flash across her face.

"But...we never spent time together." She placed her head in her hands, "It's all so fuzzy. Like trying to look through the fog."

"You're right Paige. We had one disastrous session and I never came back. I kept my distance from you because I was afraid of getting close to someone again." I explained, mentally kicking myself for wasting all that time.

"Every single day I wanted to go to you, to talk to you. I heard from everyone else how amazing you were and I guess I started to fall for the impression I had of you." I said as I looked into her eyes, searching for understanding.

"You were projecting Steve. I understand." She told me and I nodded.

"We had made an agreement to be friends and I went to your hotel room that last night because I was worried about you." I ran a hand through my hair.

"Bruce had upset me in the alley...I was smoking." She said softly.

"Are you remembering that?" I asked and reached for one of her hands.

"He was so angry. He was mad because we showed up at dinner together. He..." She gasped and shook her head.

"What Paige?" I asked and she continued to shake her head.

"I don't want to think like this...it's so self-centered." She looked so heartbroken.

"Bruce wants me...he resents you." She murmured so quietly.

"You two were very close, do you remember?" I prodded, hoping she wouldn't remember some feelings she had for him.

"I know that, but I never had an inkling...I remember feeling so surprised because it seemed to come to a head that night." She said as she looked at me, "That was the night I disappeared..."

I nodded, "Yes, we began the search for you the next day."

"Bruce knows something..."

"I've always felt that way Paige." I told her truthfully.

We sat in silence for several minutes when she spoke up again.

"How did you feel about me when you found me again?" She asked.

I smiled wide, "I was so relieved and then so scared because you didn't remember me or your life."

"How did you feel about Nicole?" Paige asked me.

"I wanted to comfort her. Lock her away so no one could hurt her or you again." I sighed. I knew this was necessary, but I didn't like it.

"Nicole was so different from you, Paige...but so similar. Not just physically, but you both pace the floor when you're nervous or trying to control your temper." I laughed lightly and I watched as she brought her thumb up to her mouth and began to chew on it slightly.

"And that," I said as I pointed at her. "Nicole did that too." Paige immediately dropped her hand back into her lap and we both laughed.

"She laughed a lot and she was quick to open up to me." I said and leaned back in the chair.

"Nicole was the version of me that you wanted." She said softly, but I saw the question in her eyes. "I didn't laugh with you or open up to you."

"Paige, it was like a relaxed version of you. Quick witted like you, beyond smart, and wanted to make sense of her life." I explained hoping to relieve some of the tension I was feeling from her.

"You helped her with that. That's why she...why I love you." Paige said softly.

"Paige, don't say that if you don't feel that way. It's not fair to either of us." I said slowly, wishing desperately for her to smile at me and reassure me.

"I feel it Steve...I can't explain why I do." She said as she mimicked my posture. "I can remember your hands on me, the way you kiss me, and I can remember how much my body wants you."

I swallowed audibly and dared to look directly in her eyes.

"I don't know what to say." I finally said honestly.

Paige leaned forward and grinned at me.

"Say you'll take me...home."

I nodded and threw a few bills onto the table as a tip and wrapped my arm around her as we walked out of the cafe.

We moved down the street to where my bike was parked when Paige looked up at me and smiled.

"This feels right." She said with a wink.

Just as I was about to stop her in our tracks and kiss her again we were interrupted by a loud explosion.

The ground trembled under our feet.

"What the hell was that?!" Paige asked as we looked around. Cars that were parked along the street had alarms going off, people that were sitting outside the cafe were standing and gathering at the corner and looking up at the sky between the tall buildings.

Paige and I ran over to where the crowd was and we saw billows of black smoke rising in the air.

I heard my phone ring and when I pulled it out of my pocket, I wasn't surprised to see Tony's name on the screen.

"_Cap, we've got a situation. Get back to the carrier now!"_

"Let me drop Paige at her apartment and I'll be right there." I said as I dragged her back to my bike.

I heard both Tony and Paige protest at the same time.

"I'm going with you Steve!"

"_Bring her with you Cap."_

I looked at Paige for a moment and realized this was the day when we would find out what she was really capable of.

I shoved my phone back in my pocket and tossed her a helmet and strapped mine on.

We jumped on my bike and I raced through the streets to get back to the pier.

We hit traffic and ended up parking and running the rest of the way to where the carrier was docked.

As we ran up to the gangplank I saw where the explosion had been; in one of the lower levels very near to where Bruce's holding cell was located.

We pushed past security and met Director Fury and Stark on the deck.

"What happened?" I asked as I scanned the area.

"The Hulk happened. I told you that cell wouldn't hold him if he wanted to get out." Tony said and I saw Fury frown in his direction. "I'm just saying."

"Cap, we need to find him immediately." Fury ordered.

"That's fine director, but where do we start? We know he's smart enough not to go anywhere we would think to look for him." I sad, exasperation lacing in my voice.

"I think I know where to start." The three of them turned to look at Paige as she reached into her shirt and pulled out a folded envelope. She handed it to me as Tony and I looked at her quizzically.

"It's from Agent Coulson."

**A/N: Thanks for reading and hanging in here with this story. OK, two things on the docket. #1...The Assignment will be taking a brief hiatus. I've have another WIP that was started back in 2009...I have about 5-6 chapters left and I'm going to knock it out in the next month. I WILL BE WORKING ON THE ASSIGNMENT ALSO! I'll need to keep you all happy, but don't expect an update for at least 4 weeks. Sorry folks, but if the stories were reversed, I'd being the same thing for this one. **

**#2...Speaking of this story...I'm planning for about 7 more chapters. (With the other story finished, these 7 should be loooonnnngggg ones too). That being said, I know how its going to end. I can see it on the horizon...does this story deserve a sequel? Or will you let me know at the end? Think on it and let me know.**


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